Shall I complain or just leave it?

[LemonsAreSour]

I'm possibly being sensitive, hormonal and really stressed about this whole situation. However, this incident did actually upset me and I'm mortified.

I had a miscarriage two weeks ago, but today I had an appointment (large global chain store) on the high street. I thought I'd go and enjoy the sunshine.

I had some culotte shorts on and I never in a million years expected what happened next

Had my appointment and was sat in the room after and I felt blood pouring out of me. I tried to get out the room quickly but as I stood up, the blood began streaming down my legs. I was stood holding my vagina whilst asking to use the toilet. I was told no, but I could use the restaurant over the road or some public ones. We had a bit of back & forth debate, I was still told no I cannot use the toilet. I told him I'd had a miscarriage and needed it ASAP.

He went off for 5 minutes and I really needed help by this point so I came out of the room and asked another customer to ask for another member of staff. The customer was lovely and offered To call an ambulance and asked if I was ok etc. At this point another member of staff came over but repeated the same as the first - I cannot use the toilet but gave me directions to the public one! I told him I’d had a miscarriage, I cannot walk over there in front of everyone and I was getting quite upset. I’m not sure what happened after then but a lovely female member of staff escorted me to the toilet and waited with me until DP came.

I guess eventually I did get to the toilet but why did it take so much drama to be allowed? What if it was an elderly or disabled person? It was humiliating stood there with blood pouring out of my shorts.

I guess they’ll just blame COVID but I’m really angry.

[doublemix]

@LolaButt I totally agree and I have and will continue to let people use the toilet and back room areas/offer first aid etc I just wanted to point out that it's not always a case of that person being funny and just not allowing it. Once they realised it was an emergency anyone with an ounce of common sense and decency would help.

[user1471538283]

I'm so sorry. Its human decency to allow you to use the facilities. Do complain and tell the company what you told us.

[nothingcanhurtmewithmyeyesshut]

They should have let you as soon as they saw the blood as it sounds like it was accessible enough.

We couldn't have let you though, where I work no matter what was happening. Our staff toilet is off the warehouse and you have to walk through an active forklift area with cutting machinery, scissor lifts etc. New employees have to go on a banksman training course before they can start because absolutely no one is allowed out there unless trained and wearing hi vis clothing and steels. No exceptions, it's an immediate sacking offence.

Best we could have done was called an ambulance. Doesn't sound like this was the case at Specsavers so obviously not condoning their behaviour but just pointing out that there are some placed that genuinely couldn't let anyone out the back.

[bumblenbean]

That’s so awful OP I’m sorry As if it wasn’t traumatic enough they made it so much worse by making you wait around and refusing to deploy a modicum of human compassion and common sense. Talk about sticking to the rules like an automaton

What would they do if someone shat themselves in the waiting room? Just send them on their way? You’d think if nothing else they would want to contain the damage and allowing the poor person into the loo would surely help with that!

[MsAdoraBelleDearheartVonLipwig]

Please do put a complaint to the store in writing. Obviously praise the lady with the humanity and common decency. Tell them it will be all over the local Facebook and Twitter. Ans then come back here and let us know what they said. I am raging for you. I hope you’re ok now.

[SpnBaby1967]

It seems when covid came along it had the side effects of removing people's ability to have empathy!

I hope you hear back from their head office, what appalling staff.

[Zari29]

I'm so sorry you were treated like this. Absolutely complain. Some people just have no humanity. Sorry about your miscarriage. X

[Houseofvelour]

Complain to head office and take it to social media if you don't get very far with them.
I'm so sorry xx

[LEAIssues]

I think depends on the individual staff members.

During lockdown, I took my ASD son for an eye appointment at our local SpecSavers. My son has extremely high anxiety. While waiting to see the optometrist, he mentioned that he needed to use the toilet and the staff just took a look at him and showed him where to go - he was wearing ear defenders and looking very anxious. In fact he asked to us it a couple of times during the appointment and they were all right with it. When I thanked them for being so understanding, they said rules were meant to be adapted for individual circumstance...

[FrenchBoule]

OP,so sorry for your loss.
I would definitely complain and make big issue out of it,what they did was inhumane.

On the other note- WHY THE FUCK shops are opened and toilets closed?
“Because of covid” is piss poor excuse (pun intended),people NEED the toilets to be opened.
Friend came across the toilets being shut at the services “because of covid”. I thought services were the places to stop, top up fuel,get a snack,drink and go to the toilet?

[Tistheseason17]

There are always exceptions to rules - common sense and humanity prevails.

Glad you have complained.

[RestingPandaFace]

@nothingcanhurtmewithmyeyesshut

They should have let you as soon as they saw the blood as it sounds like it was accessible enough.

We couldn't have let you though, where I work no matter what was happening. Our staff toilet is off the warehouse and you have to walk through an active forklift area with cutting machinery, scissor lifts etc. New employees have to go on a banksman training course before they can start because absolutely no one is allowed out there unless trained and wearing hi vis clothing and steels. No exceptions, it's an immediate sacking offence.

Best we could have done was called an ambulance. Doesn't sound like this was the case at Specsavers so obviously not condoning their behaviour but just pointing out that there are some placed that genuinely couldn't let anyone out the back.

In those circumstances you would have been quite right to call an ambulance, as would Specsavers but instead the left her standing there and suggested she go across the street to a restaurant.

[Nanny0gg]

@MintyMabel

I guess eventually I did get to the toilet

You guess?

OFGS!!

[StacysMomMandyJessiesEx]

from the stores perspective (i dont work for this company but do work in a place where toilets are now closed)

in order to stay open operating, stores need to prove they are abiding by covid guidelines set by government and then in turn, head office

part of that is if toilets are shared customer/staff then they have to ensure a safe environment for the staff....the staff of course have to be there, its work....customers can choose. its harsh but the duty of care is to staff who are contracted to be there

our covid policy is the same but relaxed now ....we have had clean tidy toilets until the policy relaxed...now they are back to being a state due to allowing public to use them. so can see both sides.

also....giving first aid/medical emergencies.....its the personal choice of the first aider as to how much first aid they are prepared to offer with covid around

personally i have gone straight in with no thought to covid on 3 occasions now. but we are not forced to.

[StacysMomMandyJessiesEx]

op, i hope you are ok now. i think for most people instinct would kick in and they would help.

[HOkieCOkie]

Complain they sound awful

[FictionalCharacter]

@StacysMomMandyJessiesEx Stores also have a legal duty of care towards customers. I’ve studied health & safety law and I can assure you employers have a duty of care to customers, visitors, contractors etc., not just to staff. The fact that the customer chose to be there is irrelevant. One she’s on their premises that they control, they have a duty of care.

OP was left bleeding profusely and not offered either use of a toilet nor medical assistance. Utterly unacceptable. She wasn’t just asking to use their loo for a pee because she couldn’t be bothered to go to a public one.

[Queenie8]

@LemonsAreSour I'm so sorry for your loss.

I too had an awful experience with S**s last week. I was out shopping and a lady fell outside their store, I was ten yards away, plenty of people walked past. I and a stall holder went to her aid. I went into the store to ask for a first aid kit. They literally handed it to me and went back to the store, no help whatsoever. Thankfully I'm first aid trained. I administered first aid, stayed with the lady for half an hour, and then returned the first aid kit. You'd have thought I'd have taken a poo on their doorstep the way they spoke to me.

[StacysMomMandyJessiesEx]

how far would a legal duty of care go though? to break covid compliance?

an ambulance was offered i believe.

as i said, i personally would have (and actually have) bent the covid rules/guidelines to help customers. i'm human, of course.....but where would i stand if a colleague complained? i'd be in a disciplinary....or worse, if covid cases came off the back of it.

we are audited on covid. theres a lot of pressure on places where the general public mix with staff

again,'m not being horrible here, just interested and trying to understand

[StacysMomMandyJessiesEx]

[quote Queenie8]@LemonsAreSour I'm so sorry for your loss.

I too had an awful experience with S**s last week. I was out shopping and a lady fell outside their store, I was ten yards away, plenty of people walked past. I and a stall holder went to her aid. I went into the store to ask for a first aid kit. They literally handed it to me and went back to the store, no help whatsoever. Thankfully I'm first aid trained. I administered first aid, stayed with the lady for half an hour, and then returned the first aid kit. You'd have thought I'd have taken a poo on their doorstep the way they spoke to me.[/quote]
thats lovely....well done for doing that, i can imagine it was very much appreciated. can't understand people walking past or not offering distanced assistance at the very least

[eclipsechips]

@LemonsAreSour I'm so sorry for your loss and the way that you were treated.

[Summersun2020]

Oh OP I’m sorry you went through this no you’re not being dramatic. I feel like humanity has gone out their the window in the name of covid! Please let us know the response from the head office.

[DaddysGirl36]

@StacysMomMandyJessiesEx

how far would a legal duty of care go though? to break covid compliance?

an ambulance was offered i believe.

as i said, i personally would have (and actually have) bent the covid rules/guidelines to help customers. i'm human, of course.....but where would i stand if a colleague complained? i'd be in a disciplinary....or worse, if covid cases came off the back of it.

we are audited on covid. theres a lot of pressure on places where the general public mix with staff

again,'m not being horrible here, just interested and trying to understand

The ambulance offer was by another customer who OP had to ask for help when the staff left her alone. Then she was offered a toilet by the female staff member so obvs an ambulance was not called.

I feel that SS staff should have offered an ambulance immediately at least more in the way of first aid than what they did. It was not a normal toilet request, it was a medical situation

[LemonsAreSour]

Thank you for your advice and support and well wishes 

A ambulance wasn't offered by SS, it was another customer who, when I opened the door (I was in an eye testing room) and said can you shout a member of staff? She gasped as she saw the blood seeping through my shorts and running down my legs.

I said I'd already called my partner and told him they weren't letting me use the toilet and come he come to help me get out the opticians, so he will be 10 minutes and can take me to A&E if needs be.

Like I mentioned before, it all seemed to go into a blur then, don't really remember much. I remember a female member of staff giving me a white apron to wrap round me and escorted me to the toilet.

@Queenie8 sorry to hear you had a bad experience with them too. How lovely of you to stay and help.

It's clearly a very strict no toilet policy, all staff were very robotic with their responses so it's obviously drilled into them.

I sent the complaint on Saturday to HO, we never received a call back from the manager. I'll keep you updated with what happens today. I'm not sure I'll even get a proper response, probably a prewritten response and a bill for the eye test. I didn't pay for that and I've just remembered.

[StacysMomMandyJessiesEx]

Hopefully you will hear something today op