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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

The “Cycling Send-Off Woman.” What the hell?

813 replies

4cats4kids · 31/05/2021 16:41

Sorry if this sounds petty, but the most terrible woman came to my house yesterday and I still can’t believe the audacity of her. My husband is in a cycling training team and one of the things they do is meet at 7am on a Sunday morning at a cafe and then they go off out of London on their various routes. This has been going on years and they are basically cycling round the world in stages (as part of a larger group).

So apparently, this weekend was “our turn” to do lunch for this lot - a.k.a “my turn” (but don’t worry, I will not be making a habit of it). I was expecting about 8 who are all men, but this atrocious woman turned up in a sports car before them and was sitting on the drive waiting until they came. I thought she must be something to do with nextdoor (shared driveway), but when they showed up on the bikes she came in with them.

My husband was kind of mouthing, “sorry” to me and they all looked embarrassed. Then he tells me, he’s really sorry, but this is “the cycling send-off woman” Confused and today she has followed them in the car. So basically, I have since found out that this nut job of a woman seems to think she is in the cycling team and turns up at the crack of dawn when they meet and in all weathers, though she never actually cycles with them. Apparently, she always says she will join them one day, but never does. She doesn’t even have the right kind of bike, her bike is apparently more a shopping bike with streamers on the handlebars like a 4 year-old! Once she did cycle with them, but only for about a mile as she couldn’t keep up. She wears really short shorts and brings them all muffins and god knows what apparently at 7am Hmm. DH says they never eat them. Also, she waves pom-poms when they leave. I couldn’t believe it. I asked my husband why he’s never mentioned her before and I said it’s fairly obvious why she’s showing up. He just said they don’t know why she comes and they all think she’s mad. On this day, she had driven to some other cafe where they stop in Surrey because it was a nice day and she fancied the drive. Then she took it upon herself to turn up for lunch because she thinks she’s in the cycling club!

She is like something from Ab Fab and really loud. They were in the garden and there I was, backwards and forwards, while she was going on about how she’s just bought a Zwift, but she can’t seem to get it set up, so could any of them come over to her house and set it up for her (nobody offered and it was very awkward). I also heard her tell my husband (loudly) that she’d really like to bring her son to his boxing club and maybe he could he train them both? It was so very strange. As if! Also, she wasn’t exactly making an effort to talk to me. How rude. I have never come across a woman like this in my life. She is late 40s - who behaves like this?

AIBU to be annoyed that this happened at all? My husband has apologised but seems to think it’s a joke. He doesn’t get it at all. These men are late 40s and collectively, should be able to get rid of this lunatic. He says it’s a public cafe and there’s lots of people there and they can’t really stop her. Well, just find a different place to meet then!

OP posts:
Babynamechange1bn · 31/05/2021 17:23

"my muffins bring all the MAMILS to the yard"

HA!! 😂😂

OrangePowder · 31/05/2021 17:24

The oddest part of this story is that they meet at a cafe and don't eat there, but expect wives to lay on a spread when they finish.

Or maybe that the men haven't out a stop to it if it's really as odd as it seems.

There'll be a sensible story behind the woman, it's just that you and maybe, DH don't know it.

montysma1 · 31/05/2021 17:24

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RedToothBrush · 31/05/2021 17:24

@BigHeadBertha

Am I the only one whose BS detector was set off here?

It seems like this woman is more than a loony pest they all ignore, because someone is repeatedly telling her where they're meeting. Also, if she's such a hilarious spectacle, you'd think she would have come up in your daily conversation before now?

So, it seems she may be looking for a boyfriend? Are the other men married? If so, do their wives know about her? Would they like some male cheerleader/camp follower joining their wives' club when he didn't do the activity, looking sexy and asking for personal favors, or if their wives didn't think to mention it to them?

And not one of them in the whatsapp group knows how to boot her...
covetingthepreciousthings · 31/05/2021 17:25

@montysma1

Woman sounds harmless abs lonely and you sound like a bitch. If she wants to wave pom poms at middke aged men then it's no skin of your nose. I cannot fathom your level of outrage.
This is a bit harsh, OP had to run around cooking lunch for her as well as the others.
covetingthepreciousthings · 31/05/2021 17:26

This might be one of the best threads I've read on here Grin

Can anyone tell me what MAMIL stands for though?

newnortherner111 · 31/05/2021 17:27

I await the update next Sunday with interest.

DrSbaitso · 31/05/2021 17:27

@covetingthepreciousthings

This might be one of the best threads I've read on here Grin

Can anyone tell me what MAMIL stands for though?

Middle Aged Man In Lycra.
JustLyra · 31/05/2021 17:27

She's on their WhatsApp group. That means someone specifically added her.

I often roll my eyes at how quickly people jump to assumptions on here, but a woman that my husband sees every weekend and who behaves in funny/strange ways (and therefore is a likely talking point) never coming up in conversation, not even once in passing, in years would ring alarm bells for me.

PuppyMonkey · 31/05/2021 17:27

Middle Aged Men in Lycra.

AntiSocialDistancer · 31/05/2021 17:27

Middle aged man in lycra

mummydoingamasters · 31/05/2021 17:27

@covetingthepreciousthings

This might be one of the best threads I've read on here Grin

Can anyone tell me what MAMIL stands for though?

@covetingthepreciousthings middle aged man in Lycra
Eastscape · 31/05/2021 17:27

I don't really see what it has got to do with you? They (or one of them) are clearly inviting her - just leave her be.

MinorCharacter · 31/05/2021 17:27

@covetingthepreciousthings

This might be one of the best threads I've read on here Grin

Can anyone tell me what MAMIL stands for though?

Middle-Aged Man in Lycra.
Maireas · 31/05/2021 17:28

Middle Aged Men in Lycra 🙄

MinorCharacter · 31/05/2021 17:28

Sorry, X-post with everyone.

CovidCorvid · 31/05/2021 17:28

They need to delete her from the WhatsApp group.

CaveMum · 31/05/2021 17:28

She’s on the group WhatsApp?! Then tell DH to bloody delete her off it, if someone adds her back on then you’ll know who’s shagging/trying to shag her!

Jesus, if she was following them in her car then I’d call her a stalker, but they are actively encouraging her by allowing her to be on their private group.

Who’d have thunk it, 8 blokes and not a brain cell or pair of testicles between them 🙄

QioiioiioQ · 31/05/2021 17:29

A MAMIL groupie
she is isnt sheConfused
is she vulnerable?

PuppyMonkey · 31/05/2021 17:29

Yeah OP, it starts with muffins and next it’ll be macaroons and meringues, you mark my words.

murbblurb · 31/05/2021 17:29

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Blankspace101 · 31/05/2021 17:29

Well done keeping your cool OP. I’d have been furious Angry

Beefcurtains79 · 31/05/2021 17:29

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Maireas · 31/05/2021 17:29

We've all cross posted with the definition!
So, this has been going on and your husband has never mentioned it once? Hmm

QioiioiioQ · 31/05/2021 17:30

they should all be backing away slowly, she's surely unstable?

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