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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

The “Cycling Send-Off Woman.” What the hell?

813 replies

4cats4kids · 31/05/2021 16:41

Sorry if this sounds petty, but the most terrible woman came to my house yesterday and I still can’t believe the audacity of her. My husband is in a cycling training team and one of the things they do is meet at 7am on a Sunday morning at a cafe and then they go off out of London on their various routes. This has been going on years and they are basically cycling round the world in stages (as part of a larger group).

So apparently, this weekend was “our turn” to do lunch for this lot - a.k.a “my turn” (but don’t worry, I will not be making a habit of it). I was expecting about 8 who are all men, but this atrocious woman turned up in a sports car before them and was sitting on the drive waiting until they came. I thought she must be something to do with nextdoor (shared driveway), but when they showed up on the bikes she came in with them.

My husband was kind of mouthing, “sorry” to me and they all looked embarrassed. Then he tells me, he’s really sorry, but this is “the cycling send-off woman” Confused and today she has followed them in the car. So basically, I have since found out that this nut job of a woman seems to think she is in the cycling team and turns up at the crack of dawn when they meet and in all weathers, though she never actually cycles with them. Apparently, she always says she will join them one day, but never does. She doesn’t even have the right kind of bike, her bike is apparently more a shopping bike with streamers on the handlebars like a 4 year-old! Once she did cycle with them, but only for about a mile as she couldn’t keep up. She wears really short shorts and brings them all muffins and god knows what apparently at 7am Hmm. DH says they never eat them. Also, she waves pom-poms when they leave. I couldn’t believe it. I asked my husband why he’s never mentioned her before and I said it’s fairly obvious why she’s showing up. He just said they don’t know why she comes and they all think she’s mad. On this day, she had driven to some other cafe where they stop in Surrey because it was a nice day and she fancied the drive. Then she took it upon herself to turn up for lunch because she thinks she’s in the cycling club!

She is like something from Ab Fab and really loud. They were in the garden and there I was, backwards and forwards, while she was going on about how she’s just bought a Zwift, but she can’t seem to get it set up, so could any of them come over to her house and set it up for her (nobody offered and it was very awkward). I also heard her tell my husband (loudly) that she’d really like to bring her son to his boxing club and maybe he could he train them both? It was so very strange. As if! Also, she wasn’t exactly making an effort to talk to me. How rude. I have never come across a woman like this in my life. She is late 40s - who behaves like this?

AIBU to be annoyed that this happened at all? My husband has apologised but seems to think it’s a joke. He doesn’t get it at all. These men are late 40s and collectively, should be able to get rid of this lunatic. He says it’s a public cafe and there’s lots of people there and they can’t really stop her. Well, just find a different place to meet then!

OP posts:
Changechangychange · 04/06/2021 19:32

We had a man in our village who went to all the funerals, and the wakes. You could always spot him, because he was the one grinning when everyone else looked serious

There are two old women in our village who used to crash all of the wakes too, after the free food. They would be in the church at the ceremony, then ask a guest for the address.

They tried to crash my dad’s wake, pretending they were great friends with him. He was a 35yr old City worker, who was out of the house from 6am-10pm. They were elderly women. They were not “great friends” with him. My uncle gave them short shrift.

VodkaSlimline · 28/06/2021 21:14

It's been four weeks and I still can't stop thinking about this. Have there been any developments @4cats4kids ?

Skysblue · 28/06/2021 22:29

I’m with you OP. Is ridiculous. They need to remove her from whatever system they’re using to arrange meets - wattsapp, email or whatever - and stop telling her where and when they’re going to be!!!

Creepy and disrespectful to their wives to keep encouraging this stalker who is inviting them to her house and clearly wants a shag.

Garraty47 · 28/06/2021 22:30

Ooh yes, what happened?

Murraytheskull · 28/06/2021 22:47

My money is on the cycling send off woman having run off with one of the men from the group. Grin

dappledsunshine · 28/06/2021 22:56

She wasn't at the Tour de France recently was she op?

Tatapie · 28/06/2021 23:06

@dappledsunshine

She wasn't at the Tour de France recently was she op?
😂
GreenClock · 29/06/2021 08:07

I feel sorry for her. The men probably tolerate her because she adds a bit of colour and humour to their Sundays, giving her very little thought otherwise. She, however, thinks they’re her mates and probably talks of her “cycling friends” to others. The whole thing is a bit pathetic. It’s weird that the wives take it in turns to to lunches too, it’s like something out of the 1970s.

OhWhyNot · 29/06/2021 08:52

Your dh is being a bit too blasé

She is shagging one of them

Middle aged men who are obsessional about a sport and appear boring do also have affairs (maybe some of them are single)

AThousandStarlings · 29/06/2021 10:09

@ACPC

Thread of the dayGrin
Agreed !
GingerLiberalFeminist · 20/12/2021 20:11

Picked this one up from the Great 2021 threads thread.

This woman sounds terribly vulnerable and lonely.

There's a character in the Archers, Joy, who just moved in to the village and would walk up to people and never shut up about her family. She was actually terribly lonely and wanted to fit in. It breaks my heart a little bit.
😅
But tue pom poms did make me laugh

Greenpolkadot · 20/12/2021 20:51

Who gave her your address?
It seems that your gripe is mostly with your husband

Biddie191 · 11/01/2022 12:21

Just picked this up, and would love to know what happened afterwards!

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