Guy I've been on dates with has slept with someone else..aibu to be put off him?

[rachelsunshine]

I've had 3 dates with a guy and had a good time each time.
Tomorrow we have a date and we have booked for drinks and a meal.

He was out last night on a lads night out.
He has just text telling me he slept with someone last night and he wanted to be honest.
He said he still wants to see me tomorrow and hopes I still want to see him.
Aibu to be put off?
Would you still go ?

Nah.
I wouldn't
He will see it as a green light

Have you slept with him yet?

Over what period of time were the dates?

He hasn't technically done anything wrong but it just seems icky so I probably wouldn't go tbh.

The cynic in me thinks that he is testing you to see what he can get away with. Bin him.

Over the last 3 weeks.
Seen him every weekend
No we haven't slept together.

Nope. But then I would have made it clear when starting dating too that I don’t really put up with dating and sleeping with different people simultaneously. No judgement on people who do - I know it’s not really uncommon but it’s not for me 🤷🏻‍♀️

@AllDoneIn

He hasn't technically done anything wrong but it just seems icky so I probably wouldn't go tbh.

This

It's odd that he texted you to tell you that. If you're not committed and he's still free to see other people why even mention it? I guess I'd be more put off that he seems the kind of guy who's still into random hook ups etc. than the feeling he had cheated.

I'd be put off by the fact he shagged some random person he probably doesn't know on a drunken night out but that's just me

I’d think he is testing you. I’d bin him.

Fuck no. He’s obviously not that in to you if he slept with someone else last night. Does he think he gets brownie points for being honest?

I would send a message like "Thank you for your honesty, I really do appreciate it. I think I will be giving today a miss. Enjoy the rest of the weekend". And then leave it there. No drama.

Euwwwwww no

I wouldn't be put off by the shagging - you're not exclusive and haven't slept together - but why on earth would he tell you? So weird.

Yeah even though I don’t think he actually did anything wrong that would honestly put me off him.

Why would he tell you?

Very strange behaviour

Why have the dates been so spaced out? What's the communication like inbetween?
Sex is a lot more casual for some people. Didn't you have the talk about exclusivity etc? I'd say it doesn't bode well. How old are you both?

I’d see that as appalling behaviour.

The fact he told you is odd, seems like he is testing you and on that basis I would leave alone

This feels all wrong.

Urtgh.
Run.

Knowing kind of ruins any sexual tension you've been building over the last few dates.

No I wouldn’t go. I am in my fifties and find it odd to be seeing more than one person at a time never mind sleeping with them, this wasn’t how it used to be done. The strangest thing though is that he told you, his motives for that have me curious and a bit suspicious.

I agree you are not exclusive so he’s not done anything wrong but it’s the telling you that I don’t get and I find weird and odd and that’s what would put me off.