People are nicer to me now I'm a size 12....

[NoFashion]

Has anyone noticed the same?

I've been obese for at least 10 years. So school mums etc only ever knew me as a fat person. (Size 20+)

I'm now a size 12. So not slim, but normal looking and can shop in regular shops and buy nice clothes.

People are suddenly much chattier to me. Shop assistants (I've always been chatty, it's in my American genes, we chat to folk) will chat more frequently, with less of a "you're strange" vibe.

Any similar experiences? Or am I imagining it?

I don't think I gave off "leave me alone" signals when fat. But I deep down wonder if people suddenly see I'm a person too. It's hard to explain. But it's kind of crappy.

I also wonder if it's a UK thing. Don't think I ever noticed it back "home" (not that I've been there for ages now. Stupid Covid.)

I have wondered about this too.

It is not just fat thing. People are generally nicer to better looking people. There were many scientific studies on the subject. People tend to perceive a thinner person as better looking

You are not imagining it, people are definitely more attentive and nicer if you look good. That's life I'm afraid (& I've been there).

a UK size 12 is slim, trust me, unless you are very short. I was bordering on skinny at size 12.

@SomewhereInbetween1

"I'm now a size 12. So not slim, but normal looking and can shop in regular shops and buy nice clothes."

Rude. I consider myself slim at at size 12 😂🙈

Not rude at all, no one is saying you aren't slim. Different people have different body types, a tall size 12 woman is slimmer than a short one. I'm a small size 12, a 10 in some shops and at 168cm my pre-pregnancy BMI was 27 which is over weight. In most shops a size 12 is a medium.

Er, size 12 is slim thanks

@ConfusedAdultFemale

Er, size 12 is slim thanks

For some women it is, for others it is not. I'm a size 10/12 and my BMI is 27, so overweight. I'm not calling myself fat, but I'm certainly not slim.

I was slim, size 8 four years ago. I am now size 16/18. I have 100 percent noticed this yes, in shops, at restaurants, by the general public (ie door not being held open for me, no one smiles at me etc) and it's actually awful how noticeable the difference is. It doesn't actually bother me as I dislike people and prefer they wouldn't chat to me but I honestly remember being slim and so many people would chat away to me and now it's just radio silence.

Size 20,everyone hates you.

Size 12, women want to be your friend.

Size 10, men want to be your friend, women hate you.

How is size 12 not slim?!

OP, you're not imagining it, but there is another side to it. If somebody is obese people might look away because they are trying not to stare, so perhaps they end up accidentally making a person feel ignored. Also, a confident, friendly attitude goes a long way with most people, and you are probably putting out much more positive vibes, now that you are a healthy weight and feeling good about your achievement.

On the whole, humans seem to be programmed to react more favourably to attractive people, and most people do look more attractive if they are a healthy weight, rather than very overweight or underweight. Maybe the human race is just innately shallow, in that way.

How is size 12 not slim?!

It's not slim when it's me.

Size 20,everyone hates you. Size 12, women want to be your friend. Size 10, men want to be your friend, women hate you

This! Once you're below a size 10 you're the enemy of all women

Ha,ha, ha yes I have been both a size 6 and a size 16 and in between and it is so true.

Btw OP well done for achieving a healthy weight. It is wonderful isn’t it?

I agree- once in the past I managed to get down to a size 10/12 and you are absolutely night. People are generally much nicer to thinner people. I also got much more attention than when I was fat. It made me view people quite cynically given that some people only wanted to make an effort with me whilst I was slim.
I'm not slim anymore (size 18) but I care much less what people think of me anyway now that I'm a little older although I'd still like to lose a couple of stone.
Well done on the weight loss OP.

This is very definitely a thing. I used to be very obese, and I was very often either ignored or ridiculed by people, mostly but not always, men. Now in the ‘not slim but not fat’ category, I’m neither ignored nor ridiculed.

For those saying a size 12 isn’t always slim do you mean because sizing in places such as m and s is larger? I used to be happier if I got in a size 12 from Next for instance. Otherwise a size 12 is a size 12 and you’re slim end of.

@ConfusedAdultFemale

Er, size 12 is slim thanks

🙌🙌🙌

I had a gastric sleeve 3 years ago and lost 9 stone. Amazed at how much more nice and friendly the world is when you are slim.

Otherwise a size 12 is a size 12 and you’re slim end of.

So, all women who wear a size 12 clothes are the same proportions?

Yep, I went from a size 22 to a size 12-14 and people are nicer in general I find. Which is sad.
I don't miss the horrible comments from random people (mainly young teenage boys) on the street though!

It’s NOT ‘confidence’ or ‘how you carry yourself’ or dress and behave at different weights.

As PPs have said, it’s that some people treat overweight and especially obese people worse than they treat others.

Size 20,everyone hates you.

Size 12, women want to be your friend.

Size 10, men want to be your friend, women hate you.

This has been my experience. Although I don't think the men were interested in friendship as such.

@Kickthedoorbaby

For those saying a size 12 isn’t always slim do you mean because sizing in places such as m and s is larger? I used to be happier if I got in a size 12 from Next for instance. Otherwise a size 12 is a size 12 and you’re slim end of.

Different people are different! A size 12 looks different on some within it does others.

I'm short, I'm a small size 12, a 10 in some shops, but I'm overweight. I am 168 cm and 68kg *well was before I got pregnant) which means my my BMI is 27, that makes me overweight.

Overweight is not slim, I would say I'm fairly average/normal looking, but I'm certainly not slim. I weigh less than some of my size 12 friends, but for my height I should lose a stone or so.

I would suspect it's to do with your confidence. If someone is uncomfortable due to feeling fat or spotty or whatever they aren't so open, probably don't make eye contact so much. You are feeling happier about yourself - so are being more outgoing without you realising it.

To weigh in on the size 12 debate (see what I did there?), I’m a 5’3 and very small boned size 12 and I’m not slim. I have taller size 12 friends who do look slim.