AIBU?
To tell my husband that his parents cant come over
alwaystired234 · 06/05/2021 13:45
Husband has very on and off relationship with his family and will make effort every 4 or 5 months then not taking at all inbetween and has not seen his parents in a year. Purely his and their choices. hes told me yesterday that they will be coming over on Saturday to celebrate his mums birthday. They live 4 hours away and will be driving. I told him that I'm not sure that it's a good idea as its scheduled to rain and we will not be able to stay in the garden the entire time. I told him why dont we wait a couple of weeks until we can stay inside and I will cook a nice meal and it will be a pleasant experience. He has told me that we can come inside if it's cold (which I've said no to) and theyve booked time off specifically to come over. But haven't even asked beforehand. Am I being unreasonable for telling my husband they can t come over?
Am I being unreasonable?
AIBUYou have one vote. All votes are anonymous.
PinkPlantCase · 06/05/2021 14:14
Do they expect to stay over aswell OP if they live 4 hours away?
Either way YANBU, saying they can’t come would avoid the inevitable argument when it gets too cold/it rains and your DH invites them in but you say no - because those are the rules!!!
Could you suggest meeting somewhere else for a walk and a picnic? Moves the problem away from your house
Trixie78 · 06/05/2021 14:18
Of course YANBU, when you live together as a family it's just rude to make plans and invite people over without discussing it together first. How do the people who voted YABU ever coordinate their lives with their families if everyone's just doing their own thing.
Don't even get me started on the fact you're the only one who seems interested in following the rules even though we're at a bit of a crucial time in the pandemic response 🙄🙄🙄
alwaystired234 · 06/05/2021 14:25
We dont drive so cant meet half way and have toddlers. He hasnt seen or spoken to them in a year because they don't talk to each other, I speak to his parents more han he does to keep them updated on the kids. I told them to wait a couple of weeks and I'll make a lunch and do balloons the whole hog. I'm not a fan of them coming over as they dont respect me as a whole and will just come in anyway
SmidgenofaPigeon · 06/05/2021 14:31
Hmm yeah best wait until midnight on the 16th where magically covid won’t be able to enter people’s homes.
Or maybe just get on with it now, and let common sense prevail, but then it’s a little bit obvious you’re hoping to use covid as a reason to say no.
PatrickBatemann · 06/05/2021 14:34
@SmidgenofaPigeon
Or maybe just get on with it now, and let common sense prevail, but then it’s a little bit obvious you’re hoping to use covid as a reason to say no.
This
PatrickBatemann · 06/05/2021 14:38
@murbblurb
Science, data,pandemic and lots of other stuff that can be too difficult for some on here.
Common sense also seems 'too difficult for some on here' too apparently.
alwaystired234 · 06/05/2021 14:39
Oh right, I didnt realise everyone was just saying balls to it all now. 
how can I be using covid as an excuse when I said that I will do a whole party in a couple of weeks. What I'm not a fan of is being TOLD something is going to happen without even being asked, feeling anxious and stressed the entire and having 10 people shoved inside a tiny 2 bed when it inevitably pisses it down.
Horehound · 06/05/2021 14:41
@alwaystired234
how can I be using covid as an excuse when I said that I will do a whole party in a couple of weeks. What I'm not a fan of is being TOLD something is going to happen without even being asked, feeling anxious and stressed the entire and having 10 people shoved inside a tiny 2 bed when it inevitably pisses it down.Ah so it's more about the preparation?
Well, definitely get your husband to organise it/cook. He has offered it to then so he best get cracking and you just do what you can
honeybuns007 · 06/05/2021 14:42
@SmidgenofaPigeon
Or maybe just get on with it now, and let common sense prevail, but then it’s a little bit obvious you’re hoping to use covid as a reason to say no.
I think you are being unfair. The OP said that they should leave it a couple of weeks and then she will cook them a nice me and they can socialise indoors so it hardly sounds like she's using Covid as an excuse to not see them
GappyValley · 06/05/2021 14:44
But what if it rains in 2 weeks?
You’ll still have 10 people shoved inside a 2 bed house, but now with your balloons taking up more space!
Literally nothing is going to change, risk-wise, between now and then
So if you are happy to host them in a few weeks, there is nothing stopping you hosting them now other than complete pettiness and wanting to get one over on them and your DH
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