Losing friends due to who I'm marrying

[coppafeel]

I'm due to marry someone, I hate to use the word 'famous' so I will say someone 'well known' - a D list celeb if you may. We are due to get married in December. Been with him for 2 years and throughout those 2 years I have been lost really good or so I thought, friends.

He is very controversial figure and so many of my friends have opinions about his views and can't even tolerate him for me. I'm at a loss of what to do, my friends were my life and were there for me through all the bad times but they have turned on me since meeting my partner. I can't just not be with the man I love because of their views but I don't understand why they cannot separate his views from me.

What can I do here?

Do you have problems with some of his views? Is he someone who says things to be controversial? Is it Nigel Farage?

Is that you Carrie?

Sorry, not sure what being a Zeleb has to do with this. If your partner has harmful views then of course people aren't going to like him.

Is it Lawrence Fox? Or some similar 'I'll say anything for attention' type?

What are his controversial views?

@toffeebutterpopcorn weirdly Nigel jumped straight into my mind as well

I can't just not be with the man I love because of their views but I don't understand why they cannot separate his views from me.

Surely that depends on his views though? I can kinda understand if you've been married for 20 yrs & someone becomes more extreme in their views but I wouldn't fall for someone who had abhorrent views or made a living from them. I have no idea for example how Piers Morgan still has a wife!

Mrs Yaxley-Lennon?

Piers Morgan is already married.

If the people you love don't like him that should tell you something.

Hard to say without knowing what the views are. They can’t separate your views from his because you’re marrying him - surely that suggests that you find his views acceptable or tolerable? And if his views are awful enough to alienate your friends, why are you ok with them?

Surely it depends on his views and whether your friends see you accepting or excusing views they find abhorrent.

We all thought farage then 😂

This sounds a very unusual reaction from people who have always had your back before. I'd listen to what they had to say (and dump him).

Nothing

You are judged by the company you keep. If you love someone who has views they find repugnant then it's fair for them to assume those views are ok with you. If not, how could you love him? 🤷‍♀️

You'll just have to respect their decision to remove themselves.

If you are marrying him, surely you must share his views, or at least be sympathetic to them to a fair extent? Because if not, why are you marrying someone with abhorrent views??

The future Mrs Lozza Fox? If you were my friend I'd dump you too if that's the case.

I wouldn't say his views are abhorrent, but they are strong political views on the complete opposite end of the political spectrum than what my friends are. I'm not very politically minded so his views go over my head and if they were vile they would not. They just have different views but somehow I am being vilified for them. Also no he doesn't say them to be controversial they are just his opinions, however, has received a lot of backlash for them.

Are you marrying Laurence Fox?

They say you can tell a lot about someone by observing the company they choose to keep.

So yes, it will be very difficult for your friends to separate your partner and his controversial views, from you.

Good luck, I hope loving him is enough for you.

If his views are bad enough for longstanding friends to cut you off then you may want to reassess who you're in a relationship with... People don't tend to ditch their mates over bog standard political differences.

What better reason is there to avoid someone than not agreeing with their controversial positions, esp if they are known for going on about them?

If you are marrying somehow gobshite, it stands to reason that your friends are leaving you to get on with that, without them.

Laurence Fox?

If he has reprehensible views in your friends’ opinion, and you are not appalled by them, then if I was in your friends’ position I would judge you. I’m tolerant to an extent on different political views, but anything which is sexist, racist, ableist is an absolute 100% no for me. You’ve chosen your partner over your friends - don’t put this onto them.

Tommy Robinson?
But I do agree with others - what are the views? It’s quite a strong reaction for your friends to have especially if you have been friends for a long time.

Sorry, not sure what being a Zeleb has to do with this. If your partner has harmful views then of course people aren't going to like him.
Exactly. I

You couldn't be in love with someone if they had strong views on something important. I'd assume you agreed with him.

I'm not very politically minded so his views go over my head

Christ on a bike. Really?