AIBU and what am I missing here?

[AccidentallyOnPurpose]

Two days ago DD had a nose bleed in the morning. Nothing massive, stopped after a minute of pressure all well and good.

Later she went on a walk with her friend and the friend's mum. Half an hour later mum rings and tells me DD has had a nose bleed. I told her she had one in the morning and she has wipes and tissues in her back pack and I can come and get her if she wants me to. Her entire tone changed and was very angry I didn't tell her and that it wasn't fair I let her deal with this and "if I had known..".Weird ,but fair enough.

Went to get DD, turn out the "nose bleed" was a couple of sneezes where DD's snot got mixed up with old blood so there were traces but not a full blown one. Friend's mum barely talked to me and when she did was to reiterate that I should've told her. I'm just explaining this because there was no mess for her to clean up, she didn't touch any blood or anything like that. DD sneezed(albeit in her arm not in a tissue) , saw and cleaned herself up.

Later on I sent her a message apologising , saying I didn't really think it was a big deal and asking if there's anything else going going on between the girls or with me that made her react that way.

This morning I got another ranty message about how I don't get it(it's true I really don't ) ,nothing else is going on and she can't believe I'm not taking this seriously. I broke her trust and I should've told her and that's that. At this point I just left it, I still don't get it and I'm not apologising again.

So AIBU? What am I missing?

I agree with her. You should have made her aware of what had happened.

I might have mentioned it to her in passing but don’t think it’s a very big deal at all that you didn’t mention it. Think she’s being dramatic.

She sounds really over the top, it’s not like you sent her with sickness & bad belly, how bizarre

Does she have a phobia of blood or something? Its still over the top and a bizarre reaction

YANBU. Weird, is she stable? Does she have anxiety or irrational fears? If she can't deal with a little nosebleed how does she manage with her own child?

How old is your DD?

Seems like a very bizarre over reaction to me. Maybe she has a blood phobia.

I don't get it either. A nose bleed is not s big deal, it's like scraping your knee, over and dealt with in a couple of minutes. I don't see why you should have told her either, very strange behaviour frim your friend.

What ???? People are nuts!
You’ve done nothing wrong!

She probably got nervous and scared and if she'd known would have been fine.

How old is your daughter?

And has this woman explained what it was exactly that she is so fussed about?

She’s being absolutely bizarre. Maybe she has health anxiety, or a phobia.

I don't get it either. Is this a COVID related issue or something else?

I think you should have mentioned it. Some people freak out if a child they are looking after starts bleeding! I do think her reaction is totally over the top though.

I honestly cannot see the issue either.

@Rillington

I agree with her. You should have made her aware of what had happened.

Fair enough, but why? Genuine question.

I get a cold (especially at this time), or a tummy ache or whatever other pains and things, but not a nose bleed .

I wasn't "hiding" it, it just never occurred to me that I should mention it.

Have you asked what be she's talking about? I would just say that, no, I don't get it and all her to please explain how and in what way you've broken her trust.

@AccidentallyOnPurpose I have never had a nosebleed or dealt with one. If your daughter had started to have one she might not have known what to do or she might have a blood phobia. If anyone ever took my child out I always told them of any issues they may have had. You are probably a pro at dealing with nosebleeds but it would freak me out to be honest.

I don’t get nose bleeds and never have. I think if I saw one it would freak me out a bit. Maybe this woman is the same and doesn’t fully understand that they’re harmless.

@Chamomileteaplease

How old is your daughter?

And has this woman explained what it was exactly that she is so fussed about?

She's 10 , which is why she sorted herself out with no input from friend's mum and wasn't fussed at all.

I honestly don't know. The main issue really seems to be that I didn't tell her and the implied "you've hid it from me".

I just don't get it and that's what really bugs me.

@TheWaif

Have you asked what be she's talking about? I would just say that, no, I don't get it and all her to please explain how and in what way you've broken her trust.

This exactly!

This depends on the age of your daughter, if she is young, 8 or under I would be angry with you too because if that happened to me whilst your daughter was in my care I would have shit myself! So would be pissed you didn’t tell me beforehand.

If your daughter is 14 or so then the mum is overreacting, but that could also be due to a phobia, but if you don’t know about the phobia then she should have told you too.

YANBU, I wouldnt have apologised but I understand why you did. The friend is being a total luvvie and needs to calm down. Nosebleeds happen and you've confirmed that it's not dangerous.

She can't believe you're not taking this seriously?

Taking what seriously? It was a nosebleed, that people do get sometimes, pinch, tissue, all done. Not something I would have mentioned unless it has just happened on the way to meet them.

I would be tempted to ask her what it is that you should be taking seriously as you can only see a nosebleed that was done and dusted well before you met up with them. But I can see that would only make her more cross. So probably just nod, smile and say yes you'll tell her if there ever is a next time. Either she has some kind of phobia or anxiety that she's not told you about or she's mad.

She sounds nuts, I would have probably mentioned it but if I was the friends mum I wouldn’t call over a bloody sneeze!

She sounds way OTT.

Your friend is acting very strangely. It's a really none of her business if your daughter had a nose bleed that morning. It doesn't mean it's going to happen again and if it did, it's literally just one of those things you deal with when looking after children. It was just a bit of bloody snot, not a full on nose bleed. She's reacted very oddly about this. Maybe she realises she's been ridiculous as she refuses to explain it to you - just fobbed you off with her 'if you don't get it then I'm not going to tell you'. The mature thing to do would be to explain to you why she got so annoyed over nothing.

[quote Rillington]@AccidentallyOnPurpose I have never had a nosebleed or dealt with one. If your daughter had started to have one she might not have known what to do or she might have a blood phobia. If anyone ever took my child out I always told them of any issues they may have had. You are probably a pro at dealing with nosebleeds but it would freak me out to be honest.[/quote]
The thing is what happened on the walk wasn't a full on nosebleed. That I could kinda understand because they do look terrifying, blood everywhere,messy,having to deal with it etc.

DD literally just sneezed, snot with traces of blood came out, she wiped herself off, sneezed again ,the same.

Hell, she's had worse when vigorously picking her nose when she was little.

I suppose if it had been a full blown nose bleed I would kinda get it.