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Original poster

to expect to have more disposable income than single mums claiming benefits

1050 replies

newnails · 09/11/2007 20:21

i no longer know why me and dh bother, he works full time and i work part time so that i can juggle the child care.

i know of 3 single mums who stay near me who seem to have more money than i can dream of, out every weekend, always shopping and 2 of them manage to run cars.

i know the benefit system is needed by some people but it seems to be a complete joke these days, the wasters in this country are leading the life of reilly while the rest of us are left to slog our guts out to pay for there existence.

no doubt i will get flamed for this post but i have been out xmas shopping today trying to work to a budget then i stand next to these people at the school gates and hear about all the grants they are entitled to so they can buy xmas presents, one of them has even cut back the last 2 months and managed to save £800, it would take me bloody months to save that up.

ok rant over, deep down i am glad i am not one of these people and i do actually work for what i have but it still pisses me of.

OP posts:
LuckyUnderpants · 09/11/2007 22:19

good point colditz. And Also my children have differnt fathers, it doesnt mean im a thick slag, ive just been unlucky in love.

juuule · 09/11/2007 22:19

Colditz, I have a husband and been asked that question

jofeb04 · 09/11/2007 22:23

A friend of mine is a single mum on benefits. She works damn hard at home with her child - not sprog.

I am lucky, when I want a break, my dh is there, when I want to go out, dh is there (when he is not working). I have time to myself, my friend doesn't. She wakes up with her dc, and puts them to sleep. I have my dh to help with that.

Why are you assuming that some single mums (and why just mums, not dads?) can go to work easily? And what do you think about sahm's - I am a sahm, and getting child tax credit - that is a benefit!

LuckyUnderpants · 09/11/2007 22:24

yes but 3andnomore, have you lived in their shoes? not everything is what it seems from the outside, poor people tend to put on a certain appearance for the outside world so as not to look like they are poor. I know ive done it! loans, catalogues, credit cards allowed me too!

GodzillasBumcheek · 09/11/2007 22:25

i have also been asked, because my kids are so far apart - they think i'm on dh2 i guess.

3andnomore · 09/11/2007 22:25

shock horror...my sis and I have a different father....like I said my mum was on benefits and had no choice...this is NOT about this...this is about people on benefit who do seem to have an exessive amount of disposable income....

kindersurprise · 09/11/2007 22:25

Very distasteful comments on this thread.

Is there any point in this? To upset loads of decent MNetters who are doing their best for their families?

Lots of single mums rely on benefits to get by, whether they like it or not they often have no alternative.

Yes, there are some people who abuse the system but the majority of benefit claimers would be very grateful to be able to get by without state help. It is an insult to the honest people who have had bad luck to make comments like that.

LuckyUnderpants · 09/11/2007 22:26

yes but that is what the debate is moving to 3andnomore

GodzillasBumcheek · 09/11/2007 22:27

And being at work or with one partner in work is not all it's cracked up to be either. You may have extra 'disposable' income, but what about all the extra things you have to spend it on? And just getting to work is the first one.

3andnomore · 09/11/2007 22:27

I grew up on benefits...luckily my mum never felt the need to pretend, neither did we....
come on, surely people know those that truely use and know the system...and surely it does annoy people....honestly...nothing agaisnt those needing the system , possibly having paid into it as well,. if a pensioner you have paid in for so many years and get so little....

Bectheneck · 09/11/2007 22:27

By Reallytired on Fri 09-Nov-07 22:14:31
Bectheneck, are you scared of hard work?

What do you mean by this?

I'm still waiting for an answer, RT.

expatinscotland · 09/11/2007 22:29

'if a pensioner you have paid in for so many years and get so little....'

and we, the working poor of today, will get even less, if anything at all.

kindersurprise · 09/11/2007 22:30

is about people on benefit who do seem to have an exessive amount of disposable income....

How do you know? Perhaps they are just spending their money on things that you can see. Perhaps they shop at Aldi and buy their DCs a playstation. It is their decision what they spend their money on.

Or they are abusing the system, that is fraud, it is illegal and they will eventually get caught out.

3andnomore · 09/11/2007 22:30

Well....
Kinder..I think there are more then ou think...honestly, since moving here, a lot of illusions were shattered

Oh, I get often asked if es and ms/ys have different dads because es is so much older...honestly that really isn't a problem and who cares...but really open your eyes, there are people using the system, and its unfair to those that need to use it, all those in genuine need would be so much better off!

GodzillasBumcheek · 09/11/2007 22:31

I am on benefits, and i do not have a huge amount of disposable income. I make choices. Obviously i am not going to go through life whinging and crying and never buying any treats just because the only work i can get is minimum wage.

And i know plenty of people who do work without declaring it who do have vast amounts of disposable income, but dh and I have refused all offers of work 'on the side' because it's dishonest

KerryMum · 09/11/2007 22:31

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

3andnomore · 09/11/2007 22:31

what is your point expat?

expatinscotland · 09/11/2007 22:31

but the OP isn't going on about fraud, but about single mums on benefits at all.

colditz · 09/11/2007 22:32

people on benefits who have a huge amount of disposable income are on the fleece. benefits do NOT give you a huge amount of disposable income, not at all. So who are you moaning about? People who break the law? People who have the misfortune to fall pregnant while on benefits (cos NOBODY can be that desperate for £25 quid a week, not after they already know what babies are like!)?

Bectheneck · 09/11/2007 22:33

We may know of people who abuse the system. What I object to is being tarred with the same brush by people who can't be bothered to think before they churn out offensive sweeping statements.

KerryMum · 09/11/2007 22:33

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

expatinscotland · 09/11/2007 22:33

what's yours, 3?

how can you compare pensioners with single moms?

it's a non sequitur because one set, pensioners, are a different group of people, with different housing needs, different care needs, etc.

and contrary to the very backwards and sad attitude which seems pervasive in this country at this time, but plenty of pensioners work and enjoy it.

MissZee · 09/11/2007 22:34

So a single mum with two kids has 170 quid a week to pay bills and buy all their clothes and food, as well as any unexpected things like fixing a fridge... Doesn't sound like the life of reilly to me - I think they should get more.

The actual amount of benefit fraud is tiny. And to be honest if a struggling single mum does a bit of cash in hand cleaning or something while her kids are at school so she can give them a bit extra I don't have a problem with that.

People should spend more time and effort on their owns lives and less worrying about their neighbours!

3andnomore · 09/11/2007 22:34

godzilla, that is because you are honest and have a sense of pride...people born into that system seem to have lost that sense of pride and seem to expect it...and I am talking as some one who sees it here day ion and out....it really is sad and I want to shout....don't you have any aspirations...fgs....whilst I am so annoyed I do think poor buggers...no chance and no idea of the chances they have

susiecutiebananas · 09/11/2007 22:34

I too was responding to the first page, and found my post half way down the second!

I'm HORRIFIED by some of the comments i am reading on here. We are talking here about PEOPLE. Mothers or fathers with children, trying to do the best thing for their children.
IF that is to be at home with them and live on bugger all, then so be it. you go off and try doing the same. Try living in rented accommodation knowing you could be chucked out of your HOME at all but a moments notice. NO security. knowing you can never buy your own property of better yourself financially for the future.
Have you even considered those who are not well enough to work, such as myself? am I benefit scum too? my sick pay has run out. I have paid taxes as has my entire family since 17 years old. surely, i should be allowed to claim some of that back now that i really need it, in order to feed and clothe my daughter, and myself? My Dh doesnt earn enough to cover everything. He has to find rent for accomodation elsewhere due to his job, we cant pay both, and everything else as well. we have NO choice what so ever, and curently no way to even begin to think about buying a home for us.

I planned to have my DD and return to my job as a nurse. I cannot do this due to an injury i got whilst at bloody work in the first place!

Some of you really need to do a bit of soul searching here and really truly see what it is that you are complaining about.

I strongly suspect you you find its a case of projection, and you are infact pissed off about what you DONT have, rather what others do have. have you considered all you DO have? a loving partner, a roof over your DC's head. Family life. money cannot pay for some of those things. you are blood fortunate, and have things many single mums on or off benefits would dearly love.

also to pick up in the FREE BABYSITTING thing.. why the hell should a single mum not get this occasionally? You try being the sole carer for your Dc's with NOONE to help you 24/7 try dong that for a little while then see if you would be complaining about getting a few hours to yourself, to be a human. Sure, there may be some of you who have not been out for 10 years with your DH's but at least you get some respite from solely caring for your children. you have no idea how utterly exhausting it can be, day in day out, hour after hour 24/7

I've never been so pissed off at reading anything on here before. I'm disgusted by some posts i'm reading here. really disgusted.

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