Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8

Original poster

To be annoyed at this teacher?

197 replies

durchsuchenden · 15/03/2021 20:41

My DS is 12. His dad passed away a few years ago. Today ds came home and he seemed upset and he told me that he was crying In last lesson and the teacher told him to get on with his work instead of crying as he's in year 7 now so he should start acting like it.

Ds told me that he asked to go to the toilet to get a tissue and the teacher refused and told him to stay after the lesson was finished. The teacher told ds that he needs to get on with his work instead of crying and acting like a 2 year old

Aibu to be annoyed and wibu to phone tje school tomorrow?

OP posts:

JaquiMcquacky · 15/03/2021 20:42

Yanbu. I’d hit the fucking roof.

Anotherlovelybitofsquirrel · 15/03/2021 20:42

Terrible teacher! Yes you need to call the school. I'd be fucking livid. Poor DS, that teacher shouldn't be teaching.

boredinthouse · 15/03/2021 20:43

Poor kid, yes complain to the school.

Raera · 15/03/2021 20:44

I think we need to hear the other side of that situation

LaMainDeFatima · 15/03/2021 20:44

Yes! This teacher needs some serious training

BrumBoo · 15/03/2021 20:44

That's very odd. Why was he crying exactly? I'm really surprised a teacher would speak like this to a child, I mean it bypasses many safeguarding concerns to begin with....

FelicityPike · 15/03/2021 20:45

Why was he crying?

ChameleonClara · 15/03/2021 20:47

I would be pretty angry about this, I would bypass the teacher and ask someone more senior to find out what happened.

iklboo · 15/03/2021 20:47

And this is why male mental health is through the floor.

ChlamydiaSexPond · 15/03/2021 20:47

Ummm... I'm not convinced it happened just like that. I'm sorry your son was upset in school but no teacher would do this. They are educators, not arseholes!

I think your little darling might be telling fibs

MuddleMoo · 15/03/2021 20:49

Yes definitely take this up with the school. It's possible you're only getting half the story but if not then that is awful behaviour from the teacher.

BrumBoo · 15/03/2021 20:50

@iklboo

And this is why male mental health is through the floor.

That's a far reach, especially as you really don't know the whole (or any) truth here.

FreddyTheFlute · 15/03/2021 20:50

Yes that sounds like an accurate retelling of exactly what occurred.

RootyT00t · 15/03/2021 20:51

Mm.

I am obviously sorry what has happened.

But why was he crying mid lesson?

DenisetheMenace · 15/03/2021 20:51

Is the teacher aware of your family circumstances?

Original poster

durchsuchenden · 15/03/2021 20:51

Ds was crying because today would've been his dads birthday (I did say he didn't have to go to school but he said he wanted to).

Ds told me that he had his head on the desk and the person sitting next to him said he was crying and the teacher told him to sit up and do his work

OP posts:

RootyT00t · 15/03/2021 20:52

@durchsuchenden

Ds was crying because today would've been his dads birthday (I did say he didn't have to go to school but he said he wanted to).

Ds told me that he had his head on the desk and the person sitting next to him said he was crying and the teacher told him to sit up and do his work

Bloody hell.

Drip feed and a half OP!

Chosennone · 15/03/2021 20:52

Are the school aware? They see a range of students with lots if trauma? Did he explain why he was crying?

It is harsh though

toffeebutterpopcorn · 15/03/2021 20:54

Why was he crying? I assume he’s just back at school and a lot of children are probably finding it rather overwhelming.

And you can tell him from me - I was taking some training when I was... must’ve been in my early 30s... and in a seminar I started blubbing like a baby (it wasn’t long after my dad died and it just hit me). A woman nearby was crying too (not sure why). Our lecturer said it just happens sometimes in the classroom.

toffeebutterpopcorn · 15/03/2021 20:54

So anyway - teacher was being horrible.

BrumBoo · 15/03/2021 20:56

@durchsuchenden

Ds was crying because today would've been his dads birthday (I did say he didn't have to go to school but he said he wanted to).

Ds told me that he had his head on the desk and the person sitting next to him said he was crying and the teacher told him to sit up and do his work

Did you inform the school he may be upset today? It's very sad his dad passed away years ago, but if days like birthdays cause him to not want to go to school and burst into tears years later, it suggests he really needs some higher level of support over it.

As for the teacher, I still have difficulty believing this happened as it did. As I said, a randomly crying child is an instant safeguarding concern, never mind a distraction for the class. Any decently trained teacher would have dealt with it carefully and as discreetly as possible. In this regard, you most certainly should speak to the school about what happened.

needadvice54321 · 15/03/2021 20:58

I'd be fuming if the teacher was aware of the significance of the date

I'd tread carefully though unless you have concrete evidence it was exactly as your son said - ie another witness. There's usually two sides to every story and your son is already upset today so he may have taken something the wrong way possibly?

cansu · 15/03/2021 20:59

Did teacher know the pertinent info about it being his dad's birthday? If he or she didn't then you are being completely unreasonable.

HercwasanEnemyofEducation · 15/03/2021 21:00

OP. I would phone and speak to the school and try to find out what happened from the teacher pov too.

Whilst the stuff the teacher said is obviously wrong, they wouldn't have known about the significance of the day.

You may have an awful teacher who treats everyone like this. Or you may have a person who is struggling themselves and dealt with the situation badly. Speak to the school, without accusations, and find out what happened.

ChameleonClara · 15/03/2021 21:00

No teacher should just tell a child to stop crying. A child crying is cause for concern.

Flip

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

Join Mumsnet Log In

This thread is closed and is no longer accepting replies. Click here to start a new thread.

Swipe left for the next trending thread