To ask for money for wedding presents?

[AvocadoHo]

Myself and fiancé have been together years, lived together 3years. We have everything for our home. Although, we are currently in the process of renovating. We get married next year and fiancé has said about asking for money for wedding present that we can put towards house renovation.
Is this acceptable? How would you word it? I've had a few wedding invites with the cheeky/funny poems asking for money and these make me a little uncomfortable. 🙈😂

I’ve seen threads on here saying it’s not ok but I’m in my early 30s so the last few years have been completely full of weddings including ours and every single couple have asked for money as they all love together and don’t want presents.
I think we used something I found as a suggestion online saying that if people wished to give a present then we’d very much appreciate contributions to our honeymoon. I think that’s very much the norm now to just give money.

Asking for money in lieu of other gifts is in extremely poor taste.

No, you don't ask for money. Very rude IMO.

Awful. If you don't need presents then say so. Weddings are expensive enough for guests without expecting them to fund your DIY.

I would be happy to give you cash or vouchers for B&Q or wherever you'd buy your materials from. The poems are mega cringey though.

Times have changed and giving money as a gift is generally the done thing at a wedding. I don't think I've been to a wedding in the last decade that has asked for anything else, including my own. Nothing wrong with it at all.

Every wedding I've ever been to has asked for money so I think it's perfectly acceptable. Don't like the poems or anything though I think it's better to just let people know if they ask or maybe a note on wedding website if your doing one.

I love couples asking for money. It’s the easiest gift - pop it in a lovely card, done!

Ignore everyone who says it’s in bad taste. In the 20+ weddings I’ve been to in the last 5 years, everyone has asked for money. No one thinks it’s in bad taste or vulgar anymore

If I cared about someone enough to attend their wedding, I'd be planning on buying them a decent gift anyway. So I'd see no difference in saving the cash I would have spent on a gift to give to them. Same difference really.

I've never been to a wedding that asked for money (though only a couple of weddings in last 10 years).

Poems are awful. Don't do that.

Fine to ask for money/vouchers for B&Q etc. I have never brought an actual present for a wedding - it's all cash, currency for honeymoon or vouchers in my circles.

If it made YOU uncomfortable, why would YOU also ask for money?

I’ve never actually been to a wedding where I didn’t gift money. It’s the done thing nowadays, at least in my family and friends circle.

I love it, it’s so easy and requires no thinking. Don’t do the poem though.

Don't mention gifts at all on the invitation.

Most will likely give money anyway.

I would say thank you but due to renovations we are unable to accept and store any gifts. We will have a wedding post box available for any cards if you would like to use that. No mention of money and anyone but who wants to will pop a voucher or cash in a card.

It's vulgar in my eyes sorry.

Maybe don't ask, see what you're given.

I think it's rude to ask for any kind of gift with an invitation. We didn't ask for anything, the vast majority of people gave us money or vouchers (john Lewis etc) with the occasional gift.

I think it's in poor taste. I've never understood why people expect presents at a wedding anyway.

The last year will have been hard on some, so asking for money is just insensitive IMO.

I hate people who say we have everything so just give money. There's no good way to ask for cash. It's just rude. If you are renovating perhaps look at a John Lewis gift list for some nice homeware. You presumably need curtains and furniture. Sorry.

No, very rude.

I would be very uncomfortable with that and might just avoid the whole thing. Or ignore the request and give wine or give something to charity instead.

If it makes you uncomfortable when others do it why would you consider it for yours?

We just didn’t mention gifts. Some people asked if they could give money, some gave gifts. We didn’t invite them for what they would give.

It’s fine OP. Most of the rest of the world gives money as standard. It’s just practical.

Of course the silver photo frame brigade on here love an excuse for a froth.

I think it’s very poor taste to ask for money for a wedding gift, it’s akin to charging an entry fee.

I’d never turn up empty handed to a wedding but would decline an invite that asked for cash as would feel like I was being invited for the cash.

It’s grim lm afraid. Even on some wedding websites people cringe at money poems