Aibu to send him for more mince?

[EatTheMince]

DP went and got all the ingredients for tonight's dinner which he is going to cook. We don't live together but are in a bubble so eat together a lot.

We are on a strict cut cycle before the gyms reopen so counting calories and macros. I obviously get a lot less calories than he does though. He tries to eat 2500 and I get 1400.

He is making chilli and he has bought pork and beef mince rather than lean mince beef. I wasn't going to say anything but when logging the calories this morning (I plan my day out in advance) I figured out that it is significantly more calorific. I mean if we had lean mince I could have chilli rice and a mini naan for less calories than just the chilli made with the other mince.

I couldn't help myself but mention it and BF has agreed to go any get more mince but I feel like an absolute brat! Usually I would just be great full that someone has bought and cooked a meal for me and eat what I am given but I am really trying to focus right now.

So YABU - it's only one meal you should have kept quiet.

YANBU - he knows you are on a strict calorie allowance and should get the lean mince.

The nights must simply fly by...

I wouldn’t say you have an eating disorder just from this one incident! However you do seem a bit obsessive about your hobby and not willing to “let go” at times when life gets in the way of the hobby. Which isn’t great, whether your hobby is body building or crochet. But body-based hobbies do have the additional danger of potentially tipping over into eating disorders. Not saying that’s where you are, but just be careful that you’re not losing perspective.

He was happy to go
His mistake
Yanbu

It goes to show how many have no idea about nutrition , diet and calories

To even suggest that you have disordered eating shows scary lack of knowledge about the topic

I did admit the over reaction straight off and explained why I over reacted, being at the very start of a new diet and wanting to give it my all.

Yes if I was that concerned all the time I would probably wear myself out. Though think how many calories I would burn worrying about it!

People post on Mumsnet about all kinds of things, doesn't have to be all doom and gloom all the time and I got myself a clearly much needed grip.

Though I stand by my point mini naans are essential to my personal happiness.

@EatTheMince can I ask, how frequently do you think about food in general? Is what you eat and how much calories etc on your mind a lot? Do you have a realistic view of your body? And can I ask why you’re calorie and macro counting if you’re normally fit and healthy and going to the gym?

Christ on a bike there's some miserable people on this thread , someone doesn't automatically have disordered eating if they are calorie counting
You have a lovely DP, what's in the lemon meringue thingies?

@Nicolastuffedone

The nights must simply fly by...

They really do, honestly not enough hours in the day to fit everything in!

@Chloemol

Wow boring couple counting calories etc

I am all for eating healthily, undertaking exercise etc

But when it becomes the be all and end all, that he has to go out to get extra mince it’s to far

Life is for enjoying

Can you not RTFT?

This is part of an exercise programme OP & her DP are following. They are cutting now, to bulk later, with the aim of lifting heavier weights.

It may not be for you. But it's not unhealthy or boring or all about counting calories.

No need to be so dismissive about something that you don't understand.

All seems very obsessive, both the calorie counting and the exercise

@Cocolapew

Christ on a bike there's some miserable people on this thread , someone doesn't automatically have disordered eating if they are calorie counting You have a lovely DP, what's in the lemon meringue thingies?

I'm not allowed to know the exact secret recipe but usually some kind of protein powder, an egg, baking powder and then the flavours so in this case meringue and lemon curd, he makes cracking rocky road cups with chocolate chips and mini marshmallows too. Maybe they have flour in?

It depends how you asked but YANBU if it was in a way which is polite, very chilled and no big deal, he could have said no if he didn’t want to 🤣

@Cocolapew

Christ on a bike there's some miserable people on this thread , someone doesn't automatically have disordered eating if they are calorie counting You have a lovely DP, what's in the lemon meringue thingies?

What's miserable is stressing about eating mince with a slightly higher fat content than normal.

Calorie counting alone might not necessarily equal disordered eating, but the rest of OP's posts definitely scream "problem eater" to me.

My dad is similar and although he eats incredibly healthily and exercises a lot, he definitely has some form of disordered eating. Most likely orthorexia, which is an obsession with healthy eating that goes too far.

Your disordered attitude to food is the problem.

Honestly so many posters unable to RTFT

OP has clearly explained what this is about. Both people are approaching food / exercise in the same way.

There is no evidence at all of disordered eating. Just the OP probably panicking about moving away from her plan.

[quote ChancesWhatChances]@EatTheMince can I ask, how frequently do you think about food in general? Is what you eat and how much calories etc on your mind a lot? Do you have a realistic view of your body? And can I ask why you’re calorie and macro counting if you’re normally fit and healthy and going to the gym?[/quote]
Well Chances you can ask ...or you can read OP's posts where she explains why she's doing this.

🤦🏻‍♀️

[quote ChancesWhatChances]@EatTheMince can I ask, how frequently do you think about food in general? Is what you eat and how much calories etc on your mind a lot? Do you have a realistic view of your body? And can I ask why you’re calorie and macro counting if you’re normally fit and healthy and going to the gym?[/quote]
I think about food in a general sense once a week when I roughly meal plan. In the morning when I log the days calories, at meal times when I am eating and any time my belly rumbles in between.

I have a slim enough body but my body composition is higher in fat than I would like and lower muscle tone than I would like.

I am counting calories and macros because my goal requires me too. You can't lose fat without a deficit and you can't really build muscle without a surplus so either way I need to be aware of what is going into my body. I am tracking macros because protein is essential for muscle growth and carbs are needed for energy to fuel workouts.

@EarringsandLipstick

Your disordered attitude to food is the problem.

Honestly so many posters unable to RTFT

OP has clearly explained what this is about. Both people are approaching food / exercise in the same way.

There is no evidence at all of disordered eating. Just the OP probably panicking about moving away from her plan.

Thanks I probably shouldn't have posted it in here, Mumsnet is notoriously weird about food!

I thought this thread was really interesting! I had no idea about cut & bulk & I feel like I've learned loads!
Is cut the same as a shred?
Op your daily food looked sensible & delicious, feel free to post more!
Not sure I could be disciplined enough at the mo but it's always good to have new perspectives on fitness.

Just fry the mince and once it's browned and the fat runs, add a little boiling water so the fat rises to the surface. Tip the pan and use a spoon to skim it all off. Or sieve it into a bowl.

@TopTabby

I thought this thread was really interesting! I had no idea about cut & bulk & I feel like I've learned loads! Is cut the same as a shred? Op your daily food looked sensible & delicious, feel free to post more! Not sure I could be disciplined enough at the mo but it's always good to have new perspectives on fitness.

Thanks! It's all the same yes cut/shred/diet just another way of saying lose weight. Although my weight figure doesn't really bother me , it's body composition I am interested in.

Oh believe me I am rarely so focused either but I just currently have that enthusiasm that comes when you start something new and the novelty hasn't yet worn off. By the time April 12th rolls round I will be sick of calorie counting!

YABU
For one meal, would it really have mattered?!

She is cutting. My husband is body building he is eating a crazy amount of calories while training and packing on mass after this he will strip it back to show the muscle and definition and he will eat at deficit compared to the building phase calories and increase cardio and intensity in training.

I'm powerlifting I'm eating macros high in carbs compared to protein and fats which will allow me to have energy for lifting heavy I eat more macros on lifting days and different macros non training days. I would only cut if I wanted to enter a certain weight category but I'm happy with my weight and size and maintaining that.

This may appear boring to others but it's what people with specific fitness goals do. The OP is new to it and wants to do her best and has obviously panicked thinking she has undone her hardwork but within time she will relax and understand going over the odd time will make no huge impact or learn that she just has to adjust something, portion size or next days macros.

YAB totally U. If he hasn't gone out to get the lean stuff yet, tell him to forget it.

You do sound very obsessive about something that is essentially superficial. Why not use all that time calorie counting etc on something actively useful or, dare I say it, enjoyable?

@Catcrazylifter

She is cutting. My husband is body building he is eating a crazy amount of calories while training and packing on mass after this he will strip it back to show the muscle and definition and he will eat at deficit compared to the building phase calories and increase cardio and intensity in training.

I'm powerlifting I'm eating macros high in carbs compared to protein and fats which will allow me to have energy for lifting heavy I eat more macros on lifting days and different macros non training days. I would only cut if I wanted to enter a certain weight category but I'm happy with my weight and size and maintaining that.

This may appear boring to others but it's what people with specific fitness goals do. The OP is new to it and wants to do her best and has obviously panicked thinking she has undone her hardwork but within time she will relax and understand going over the odd time will make no huge impact or learn that she just has to adjust something, portion size or next days macros.

You get it completely, thanks I only started lifting weights because I wanted that insta body type but I actually get a thrill from adding on extra plates, doing extra reps. It's so much more fun that I expected it to be.

It sounds like your BF is happy to help out so all good :) I used to lift weights before I had kids and the impact on my wellbeing was huge. Your post is making me want to get back into it, but I don't think I can afford a personal trainer these days :(

So you wanted some fake body image, then wonder why people are saying you have a disordered eating habit to get that image