Aibu to send him for more mince?

[EatTheMince]

DP went and got all the ingredients for tonight's dinner which he is going to cook. We don't live together but are in a bubble so eat together a lot.

We are on a strict cut cycle before the gyms reopen so counting calories and macros. I obviously get a lot less calories than he does though. He tries to eat 2500 and I get 1400.

He is making chilli and he has bought pork and beef mince rather than lean mince beef. I wasn't going to say anything but when logging the calories this morning (I plan my day out in advance) I figured out that it is significantly more calorific. I mean if we had lean mince I could have chilli rice and a mini naan for less calories than just the chilli made with the other mince.

I couldn't help myself but mention it and BF has agreed to go any get more mince but I feel like an absolute brat! Usually I would just be great full that someone has bought and cooked a meal for me and eat what I am given but I am really trying to focus right now.

So YABU - it's only one meal you should have kept quiet.

YANBU - he knows you are on a strict calorie allowance and should get the lean mince.

@Beautiful3

Honestly, I think I wouldnt have said anything until after we had eaten. I would have said that it was delicious but really calorific! So next time could he please use lean mince instead? But its just one meal.

That was my plan but when I popped it into the macro calculator I kinda squeaked in shock and he was sat right there. Plus I really didn't want to sacrifice my mini naan

@lazylinguist

I think you might have got different answers if you'd made it clear in your OP that you had such specific diet aims because of weight lifting and that you were being trained by your body builder partner. I mean... it still sounds a bit OTT to me, and I can't imagine why you'd be that bothered by one meal, but the context would have been helpful.

I said in the OP that we were on a cut cycle before the gym re opens but appreciate I could have been clearer about what that meant and why.

You don’t sound ‘lucky’ at all. I couldn’t think of anything worse.

That's one minute of my life I'll never get back.

I dont think you're being unreasonable. But DH and I have done similar in the past and even when he's counting and I'm not, I still take his calorie allowance into account and would have bought him the lean mince. He understands clearly.

I would say a light hearted YABU 😂 Me and my boyfriend are both really into the gym and often go through cut and bulk phases. Not body builders though (not sure why some posters presume you have to be to cut/bulk it just makes things a lot easier once you get over the cut phase!), but I’d feel like a brat asking! Enjoy your dinner

I get ya, I have been there preparing for comps counting every measly calorie and macros but in all honesty get over it.

The idea right now is to minimise journeys (assuming you're in the UK) so sending him back out to get mince is definitely unreasonable behaviour. If you're that serious about it just make sure the week's deficit and macro count balances it out. One day doesn't undo the work of the month.

Oh god . It’s one meal Jesus it’s not going to harm you.

I'd say its just one meal and not to worry too much about it, but if you are are both on the same wavelength about the bodybuilding then I'm sure he will understand and won't mind getting the lean mince.

Sounds a bit obsessive
Do you have disordered eating generally?

@Hoppinggreen

Sounds a bit obsessive Do you have disordered eating generally?

I don't have disordered eating, I have a very healthy, balanced diet and am smack in the middle of a healthy bmi.

Unfortunately at the moment I am also focused on a particular goal which requires me to be very strict.

Usually I wouldn't think twice about eating the mince but when you have a goal to achieve you have to work for it.

@MuddleMoo

YABU it's not really an essential trip to go out and buy mince when you have some. Just eat less of it.

Wondered how long some bore would make this covid related

Thanks :)

Spoon the fat off the top?

It's fine op. If more people were aware of their macros and calories maybe there would be less obesity. Jus sayin'.

YABU and the pair of you sound like you're one mini naan away from an eating disorder.

@daisyjgrey

YABU and the pair of you sound like you're one mini naan away from an eating disorder.

We actually have a healthy body composition and eat a well balanced diet.

Yes I over reacted to the mince because I am in week 2 of a cut with a deadline looming. That is focus not disordered eating.

he is the one who guides me on nutrition and training so he gets it. He just didn't realise the difference in nutritional value he just picked up the first mince and didn't check.

Hang on, if he's the one guiding you then he should know surely?

Holy fuck, life's too short for endless food scrutiny. Eat the meal. Job done.

@Bluesheep8

he is the one who guides me on nutrition and training so he gets it. He just didn't realise the difference in nutritional value he just picked up the first mince and didn't check.

Hang on, if he's the one guiding you then he should know surely?

He didn't realise he had picked up the wrong mince, he just grabbed mince. He has plenty of calorie allowance to absorb the extra so would have just eaten it regardless.

He does understand me having a much reduced calorie allowance which is why he was so understanding and didn't make a fuss about popping to get the right mince.

I'm all for healthy eating but this sounds unhealthy and obsessive. More disorder than anything.

One mini naan and rice will not hurt you.

Isn't life crappy enough without worrying about a little cheat day?

@Tiktokersmiracle

I'm all for healthy eating but this sounds unhealthy and obsessive. More disorder than anything.

One mini naan and rice will not hurt you.

Isn't life crappy enough without worrying about a little cheat day?

I don't feel like life is crappy at all. I know covid is rubbish but I am very fortunate and am probably the happiest I have ever been in my personal life. Having a goal to focus on helps immensely too.

Maybe it's all the dopamine from the exercise.

Mini naan makes me happy too though!

I think the problem here is the audience you're sharing this . Most people on here wouldn't understand your mentality and the discipline it requires. By the sounds of it, you're into body building? However, you have come into a mainstream forum and asked people for their opinions so what you're getting is the honest opinions of people who don't necessarily understand your way of thinking. (You didn't say anything about being two weeks out of a deadline in your original post hence my previous reply)

You said your partner was happy to go out and get the item so that's all that matters really.

For those saying I sound like I have an eating disorder -

I am perfectly heathy other than body fat which is what I am working to address, this morning is a snap shot of our lives and came in week two of a diet, it's not unusual to want to give it your all when you start a new diet.

I quickly realised I was being a bit of brat and it wasn't that important.

But since you are so worried, here are my stats from this morning, actual figures blanked out of course but every aspect (bar fat) says healthy. So no need for concern here. Much as it is appreciated.

YANBU and your DP is lovely. Men often forget how every little calorie counts for women when on a cut. I think it's quite harsh you are being called obsessive and unhealthy here but worth remembering calorie counting etc can make people uncomfortable.