Covid has made this website toxic

[Asrui]

From last March to now there has been a preponderance of sanctimonious, patronising posts on here judging others and trying to depress people. It has just shown such a nasty side to people and imo the moderators of the site have been at fault for not having intervened to close down these posters.

@TammyTwoSwanson

I've been on MN for about 17 years. It wasn't always like this, I remember when if you were on it, you basically knew everyone else on it - as far as you can know internet friends at least.

It's not the same site as back then. It's huge now, for a start. And I think there's been a nasty side way before coronavirus.
I see a sanctimonious or nasty post now, and I just roll my eyes. But I know there are lots of people who are a lot more sensitive who would take it to heart. Shame really, because I have met some of the best people in the world from this site.

Exactly.

I REALLY miss how it used to be 😢

I would understand if you were forced to read them. But you aren't. Just stop reading threads about Covid and getting upset.

Job done.

@Sparklingbrook

When I joined in 2011 I just got stuck in and posted enthusiastically straight away after lurking for a week or so. But I got a PM asking 'who did you used to be?' which was a bit about.

I remember when you joined.

I think you just fit in so well that people assumed you'd name changed.

This isn't my original name.

f you want things to change, you need to challenge the bully, their followers and change the tone of the thread back to helpful/empathic or sympathetic

I used to try this but clearly I didn't get my tone right as I got a warning email from MN saying they'd delete my account as my posts were too aggressive.
It definitely drags you down to a certain level. And after a year of covid I'm as much of a cunt online as anyone I suspect.

I agree it’s brought out the worst in people but YABVU about the moderators. Free speech is eroding rapidly and this is a space where people can still have robust debate. Please don’t shut that down.

It’s become utterly vile. There’s no view too cynical to hold and nothing that can’t be sneered at. Some of the stuff I’ve read about the Royal family and Captain Tom in the last 24 hours has made me feel so sad and angry. It’s as if some people have lost their humanity.

Not sure it's just COVID tbh. One of my first posts on here (different name, for reason I'm about to share) I got absolutely torn to shreds, couldn't believe the viciousness I was getting from people on here that we didn't even know. It was about my partners smoking habit and lesson learnt - there are some topics on here it's not even worth starting.

@Radio4Rocks

I would understand if you were forced to read them. But you aren't. Just stop reading threads about Covid and getting upset.

Job done.

This.

I notice how it's yet another fucking thread about some MNers bringing others down, and not the Covid-denying arseholes/trolls.

@Sparklingbrook

I miss a good old 'reclining seats on an airplane' thread *@DynamoKev*

Oh yes @Sparklingbrook, they were fucking priceless -

"I was on a 14 hour flight and the bastard cunting cunt in front reclined their fucking seat aafter 4 hours the utter selfish cunting bastarding cunt - and I suffer from anxiety and entitlement.

@LatteLoverLovesLattes a bit of a naive newbie back then. I remember my first encounter with a thread that was pulled. I was shocked-people make stuff up? . Dan Snow Boss-it had everything and then-gone!

Yes, there are all sorts of nasty comments on here but I wouldn't want the sort of monitoring which stopped the robust nature of this site.
I have tried all sorts of other sites, from Gransnet to NetMums (can't think which is worst, to be honest) and find them boring, tame and lacking in vigour. I come back to this one time and time again.

I use to love how an OP could post a problem, pps could unravel the issue help them unearth problems they hadn't realised impacted on them then resolve it.
It was like being in an audience with a panel of psychologists.
Excellent reading.

@AuntieStella

If you don't like what's being posted, the answer is at your fingertips - post what you think is better

But given what you think of it ther MNetters, it might be better to have a fresh start on one of the many, many other platforms which might be more closely aligned with how you see the world

This is the kind of view that shuts down conversation. Basically: if you don't like it, off you fuck.

Here's how I feel: I've been on this site most days since my first pregnancy. In many ways it's my online home, and I feel a bit sad about the way it's changing, and fancied a discussion about it. As evidently did the OP.

What's wrong with that?

YANBU 🐍nest of vipers at times.

[quote Sparklingbrook]@LatteLoverLovesLattes a bit of a naive newbie back then. I remember my first encounter with a thread that was pulled. I was shocked-people make stuff up? . Dan Snow Boss-it had everything and then-gone![/quote]
There were some trolls back then, some really long term ones. Very sad though because they were obvious not in a good way to make that stuff up, but the trolls these days are just dim witted trouble makers

It has been toxic for years. Lots of unpleasant people who think they know best, which is never a good combination. However, there are plenty of genuine and nice people here.

@Emeraldshamrock

I use to love how an OP could post a problem, pps could unravel the issue help them unearth problems they hadn't realised impacted on them then resolve it. It was like being in an audience with a panel of psychologists. Excellent reading.

Yes. It was definitely a place for genuine debate in a robust way, but we cared about each other & though we were straight talking there wasn't the gratuitous nastiness that there is now. We got to know each other & welcomed newbies into the fold.

I wish it was still like that.

@Sinful8. You're wrong, it WAS Like that.

I completely agree with you.
It has really shown how vile and awful some people are. The fear some people have for COVID really shows in their awful comments towards others.

Your OP is pretty toxic so you fit right in.

I don't think it's limited to Mumsnet. It's the same on Reddit, Facebook, Twitter. They are all full of people shouting vile comments at each other and Mumsnet is just part of a wider problem that has seen people emboldened by the anonymity of the internet that enables them to be nasty without any consequence. 24 hour polarising news media had whipped up a frenzy and it's starting to spill out onto the streets. I've witnessed a few incidents on the streets lately where previously I think people would have let minor sleights go, now they are jumping on them and turning aggressive.

There's just far too many people stuck inside with little else to do than browse the web. I certainly wouldn't be here right now if I was able to be out and about. People's emotions are all over the place. There's fear, anger, goodness knows what else. It's all mixing together and causing a very toxic atmosphere not just on here but on most social media platforms. At least on here you can ignore the coronavirus board - even though people (like you!) keep posting in other areas about it.

What's wrong with that?

Nothing & those posters should often just read their own advice back to them. 🤣

One thing ive noticed and hate is a poster will post on a subject and their personal contact arrangements will get mentioned and the covid police will jump on this like a rat up a drain pipe completely ignoring what the poster has actually asked about.