To want an apology from DH's son

[RainbowCarpetSurfing]

DH has two DS'

We get along well apart from one or two issues with regards to them (mainly one) being rough with my small toddler. DSC are always keen for me to join in whatever they're doing.

We have a large living room and they were batting a balloon to each other and to me. I suggested we try to 'header' the balloon to each other across the room and they enthusiastically agreed.

After a few minutes of the game going well, they both went for the balloon in the middle as it was crossing the room (which wasn't what we were supposed to be doing) and bumped heads. Not hard. They are fine.

With that, the oldest one turns to me and literally screams "that was your fault, why would you say that" and runs out of the room furious.

('say that' being my suggestion to header the balloon)

Now, in hindsight I can see that maybe it wasn't a great idea on my part so I'll own that in advance of the comments saying it's my doing, but in my defence I made a point of saying "you stay there" and the same to the other one.

DSS' screeching and disrespect has gone completely over DH's head however I feel as though he should apologise.

He's now sulking.

AIBU?

He was hurt and shouted ..that's what kids do. ...

What age is he?

He's almost 11.

You want to demand an apology and make a big deal out of this? Really? He hurt his head, he was shocked and upset, get over yourself for goodness sake. "Screeching and disrespect"... honestly, you sound so pompous.

You are on about a young child aren't you? The child was angry as they were hurting

He's only 10 YABU.

Get over yourself

I’d leave it.

I think people's instinct is to overreact with head injuries. Maybe it's some primeval response.

Disrespect??? He’s a child and he’s hurt himself.

This is not about you. You are the adult. He is a child who has hurt himself and now is upset.

No one needs to apologise. No one has disrespected anybody. We all get upset and shout when we hurt ourselves.

@PoppiesinOctober

Get over yourself

Quite.

@unmarkedbythat

You want to demand an apology and make a big deal out of this? Really? He hurt his head, he was shocked and upset, get over yourself for goodness sake. "Screeching and disrespect"... honestly, you sound so pompous.

Where have I said I'm going to 'demand' an apology? I said I think I should get one, big difference.

Screeching and disrespect

Yes.

I know times have changed but I wouldn't have dreamt of shouting/screeching at an adult like that and I don't plan on tolerating it from my own children, past toddlerhood.

@unmarkedbythat

You want to demand an apology and make a big deal out of this? Really? He hurt his head, he was shocked and upset, get over yourself for goodness sake. "Screeching and disrespect"... honestly, you sound so pompous.

This!

Forget it and move on, this is what kids do, often. He’s learning to control his emotions still.

Bit daft to suggest headers in a small room

I'd be a bit miffed but I wouldn't be demanding an apology off him. He hurt himself and lashed out trying to find someone else to blame. Kids do these things.

I would have gone to see if he was ok, and gently explained that he'd been warned not to move, but it was really no ones fault and just one of those things that happen. Had a cuddle and forgotten about it.

We all get upset and shout when we hurt ourselves.

True, but shouting out and shouting at somebody is different.

He's 10, he hurt himself, he shouted. He's not disrespecting you and doesn't owe you an apology.

And it's head the balloon, not header it

This was an entirely foreseeable accident. It was a stupid idea.

Check he's OK and move on from it.

He is a child and was hurt and probably a bit embarrassed. I wouldn't make a big deal of it. He is a child.

@Indecisive12

Bit daft to suggest headers in a small room

It's a large room.

We all said that when ours were toddlers OP 😂 'my child will be perfect, this is just a phase'. You have it all to come.

DSS' screeching and disrespect has gone completely over DH's head. He's obviously well covered in the grip department

Kids often do that when they're hurt, something about not wanting to admit to being vulnerable I think. My son does it sometimes (he's 8) but if I give him a minute he'll come and cuddle up like he's still little. As he storms off, I can hear the tears starting as he runs up the stairs; I think he doesn't want to be seen to be hurt.

Have a wee bit more understanding. Definitely mention it later but first he probably needs a hug.

Erm it was your idea so 🤷🏻‍♀️
He hurt himself and reacted the way kids do when they are hurt - seriously get a grip.

Given the heightened emotions and not being at school for them it is I suspect fairly normal reaction for a 10 year old whose world is out of kilter.

Just give it a pass OP this is not the battle to fight