To think Mumsnet isn't any better than Tattle life?

[DebbieDowner101]

The site claims to be "commentary and critique of people who chose to monetise their lives as a business and release it to the public domain"

From my time on the site I've found it to be just that. Honest, and well measured critique of someone who has chosen to market themselves and/or their families online.

The threads I've seen via Instagramers claiming to be bullied has just been people giving a perfectly reasonable negative opinion on them, or something they have done. Surely if you are putting yourself online to gain followers you accept the good and the bad, and that not everything negative is bullying, still just an opinion?

Mumsnet on the other hand claims to be a resource of support for parents, but I regularly see posters jumped etc usually on a perfectly reasonable post.

AIBU to think Mumsnet isn't any holier?

can you not see the hypocrisy of calling out "people taking the piss"

should read Instcammers not people

It's no more a career than standing outside Asda asking people if they can spare any change.

I'd rather earn a living than beg thanks.

Well that's good because that's your choice. This is their choice. I don't understand why you'd get your knickers in a twist about it.

There are lots of jobs I wouldn't do because I find them a bit icky. I don't create threads on tattle or wherever to abuse them though 🤷🏻‍♀️

I think Tattle can get a bit out of hand and over excited but it is one of very few spaces online where people are able to talk about this specific kind of media they are consuming.

Review, discussion etc. of all other forms of media is accepted but very few influencers will accept even the most gentle of questioning let alone constructive criticism. All the while accepting money from their followers or because of their followers.

There is often a manipulation by the influencer of the connection that sharing every part of their life brings to many people. They rely on that connection to make money from people, the constant use of “I love you guys” and “you’re my best friends” when times are good and then “you don’t know anything about me, you bunch of horrible trolls” when people ask a simple question like “why don’t you recycle plastic bottles?”

These people are trading on a connection that is deeper than other forms of media. 1.) Films in the cinema built a connection between the filmgoer and the characters., television does it on a deeper level, it is in your home, more readily available, the physical gaze on the screen is more natural - hence some people building a deep bond to soap characters. But when it comes to influencers they are in the phone, at a maximum of an arms length away and they chat at the screen, sharing moments from the deep, through to the inane and mundane. 2.) it is relentless, many post hourly or even more often. 3.) it is an addictive form of media because it is so accessible.
They make money from (often) vulnerable and lonely people or people who get addicted to that form of media but they won’t allow any form of criticism - even valid.
No other industry does this.

So I can totally see why people look for somewhere else to discuss their frustrations. But often it does get out of hand.

There are important themes to be discussed when it comes to influencers:

• child exploitation (this is a huge issue)
• thousands of people breaking advertising guidelines and laws
• lack of ethics
• it is a new industry and is a bit like the Wild West currently
• Image manipulation impacting teenagers
• not to mention the many, many individual scandals

Until influencers are willing to have healthy and honest discussions about the above (and more) then people will seek out somewhere else to do it and sadly as with any place, some nasty idiots will get involved too.

I've been on mn for years, left quite a while ago and only back now with the latest data misuse as I use several other places including tattle instead.

Tattle, mumsnet and daily mail comments are all quite similar. The big difference on mn is it's sold as a supportive community. When in fact people genuinely looking for support are often subjected to vicious and nasty comments because they do something like use a word that some mn posters associate with a lower economic class so are fair game to rip apart. Tattle the name says it all - it's gossip, but people are talking about commercial entities and aren't unpleasant to other people for the sake of it and the insta celebs can easily ignore it. Some people on mn seem to get their kicks out of ripping someone a new one and knowing it hurts them.

Several here are misrepresenting tattle. No people don't insult a child's appearance, I've seen it happen once and people roundly called them out on it. Nore is talking about an adults appearance a big thing (you'd think by the way some say it here that it was all insulting appearances)! A very small number of comments are about appearances and that's usually calling them out on procedures they claim they haven't had or photoshopping their image to make them look totally different. I don't read all the threads, but the handful I do certainly don't match the picture that's been pained.

I know the coma thread mentioned by someone, I was there and no people weren't being vile towards her. I think there were one or two people wondering if the statement posted on her insta had been exaggerated. While that's not my view, when someone is known for lying and being deceptive on social media it's understandable that when the truth is for once being told they don't believe it. What was interesting was the number of people who have for months been breaking covid 19 rules and spreading it now wishing Grace well! Glasshouse!

Many people I believe think these floggers on insta are their friend or they wish to be one themselves - when mrs hinch gets paid 30'000 big ones just to hold up some washing powder and say it smells amazing it does seem a very attractive career! But these people are selling themselves, they are the product. It's silly to call it bullying and harassment. Would bad reviews of a Beyonce album be called the same? Of course not. But these people don't have a product or skill beyond selling themselves and their families private life. That creates a tricky problem for themselves. Also find it silly calling it stalking, that would be like saying a thread on mn about I'm a celeb is stalking them for simply watching the tv show that't broadcast for people to watch.

I'm thankful for tattle and the things I've learnt. Its the anecdote to the wild west of social media. Influencers can't expect to live their life so publicly and then silence any critique. The free world doesn't work like that.

Anyway I doubt anyone made it this far, but thanks for coming to my ted talk!!

@SabrinaMorningstar

I looked at Tattle when they kept starting their stalkerish threads over here. It's a site that doesn't help anyone. It's bitchy, nasty and stalkerish. And even though it claims to be about exposing influencers, it seems to actually focus on tearing apart women in the public eye. It's a cesspit of misogyny.

AIBU is the place where trolls and gfs descend on MN. It isn't representative of the rest of the site.

Across the rest of MN, lots of posters receive excellent advice and support every single day.

I wonder if people on here would support the "male" version of tattle "tag your sponser".

Or if the clear misogyny of outing instagramers and sex workers is too much?

Tattle, mumsnet and daily mail comments are all quite similar. The big difference on mn is it's sold as a supportive community

MN is more than just the Talk Forum -there's information pages about Pregnancy/Childbirth/Parenting etc separate from the MN Talk. Does Tattle have anything else or just the discussion boards?

@Grenlei

What's despicable about it?

WRT Hinch, personally I'm much more offended by her blatant breaches of Covid guidelines, manipulation of her sheep, exploration of her child, and claims that her fame just happened when in fact it was carefully engineered by her and her husband from day 1. Oh and all her cleaning tips were stolen from other people/ sites. Much like her mate Stacey Solomon nicked all her craft ideas from Pinterest.

But do those things really matter? Of course both Mrs Hinch and Stacey Solomon didn't invent all their tips. Probably the people on Pinterest didn't invent the craft tips. I thought this was fairly obvious

Does it really matter if Mrs Hinch wanted to become famous? I mean why devote hours of your life to this fact? And again breaking covid guidelines its frustrating but tattle is people obsessing over and over again about things like this. Its something that should give you 5 minutes of frustration, and then you move on with your life.

The latest Mrs Hinch thread is relentless mocking of Jamie having a nose job. Does it really matter? Its just a fucking nose job, people have nose jobs all the time. Its really not a scandalous thing. Its just collective bullying sniggering together about someone having a nose job which affects no one but him

I don't think anyone spends hours on Tattle. Some people post more than others, but tbh there are lots of posters who are on here all day long, they're on literally every thread. You could argue they should get a life too

If you're the product, if you're selling your Insta perfect (but ultimately fake) life, why shouldn't you be called out when you're not being honest?

Hinch has made her money claiming that she came up with all these cleaning ideas, when she was grubbing round various forums for years. She doesn't even do any cleaning any more really which is somewhat ironic. It wouldn't matter that she wanted to be famous (she did) but then fucking well own it. Don't come over all fake Uriah Heep 'ever so umble', that it wasn't planned and a sheer surprise when it was engineered. But it's all about the engagement - her market is mainly those who don't work (predominantly women), from lower socio economic groups, who are quite lonely and vulnerable, and are engaged by someone claiming to be just like them, to be their friend. The messages she and others like her put out are very carefully worded to build a connection, make followers feel special and included. You only have to see some of the comments those followers make, they genuinely think that she's their friend. Which in turn means buying stuff she constantly suggests, doing their own Hinch hauls etc so they can share it with her. Spending money they can't afford. Some even getting into debt stockpiling cleaning products whilst not being able to buy their kids clothes or shoes.

Oh and don't forget that some of the things Hinch has suggested were actually dangerous..keeping fake flowers on your hob, filling a jar with boiling water and zoflora and leaving it overnight, using zoflora as air freshener and around pets, mixing toxic cleaning products. There's more but those are just the ones I can remember. A woman died after she mixed 2 products and basically created chlorine gas or similar. And yet despite that, despite fire officers calling out some of this stuff as dangerous, she's never alluded to it. Never said - hands up, I got it wrong. Because being wrong wouldn't tie in with the brand. And so her followers will carry on doing this stuff because she's told them it's fine. And she's their friend, surely if it was dangerous she'd say so?!

I have a friend who knows the husband of a very well known instagrammer (not Hinch) who has a crazy amount of tattle threads dedicated to her. Some of the things he’s told my friend that these people who are obsessed with tearing them down have done is ridiculous. From obtaining copies of their birth certificates to contacting local businesses to try and obtain info about her or cancel appointments she’s made. I’m no fan of this woman, her account is of no interest to me but because she’s local I obviously know of her. To go to these lengths is pretty pathetic. My friend does not know the wife other than to say hello in passing when she’s with her husband

She doesn't even do any cleaning any more really which is somewhat ironic

Yes she does, and so what if her stories have branched out a bit over the past couple of years to include more family life as well as cleaning?

If you're the product, if you're selling your Insta perfect (but ultimately fake) life, why shouldn't you be called out when you're not being honest?

As said, people have "genuine concerns" and are "just keeping tabs to make sure they are being honest and true at all times" - but why are you ignoring what the posters before you have said - what about the undercurrent that if you scratch or question, is nothing but playground bullying - WTF has if someone has or hasn't got a nosejob got to do with anything?

From obtaining copies of their birth certificates to contacting local businesses to try and obtain info about her or cancel appointments she’s made.

Not surprised though as from the IG threads on here before some of them got pulled people were doing the exact same type of shit like publishing addresses etc, it's insane

@Quaagars

From obtaining copies of their birth certificates to contacting local businesses to try and obtain info about her or cancel appointments she’s made. Not surprised though as from the IG threads on here before some of them got pulled people were doing the exact same type of shit like publishing addresses etc, it's insane

I forgot about that, they have never posted the exact address but between a few of them they posted enough information to make it pretty obvious. Whatever you think of the woman, her kids live in that house:

I love it, its my total guilty pleasure.
The only person they seem to like is Harry Styles and I can get on board with that.

There’s a huge difference between posting on a forum and “hate following” a particular individual on social media. Surely Tattle users of all people would be familiar with the latter term?

If someone says that MumsNet can be hostile and unfriendly, I would concede the point and tell them to get off AIBU, for starters.

If an outsider repeatedly comments that a website reminds them of the bitchy cliques at their secondary school, there’s probably something to that impression. Instead, the response is ‘oh but we’re all doing this noble work’. .

There’s a huge difference between posting on a forum and “hate following” a particular individual on social media

Exactly.

No one publishes addresses on Tattle, that wouldn't be allowed. However a lot of these influencers take huge risks with their own security and that of their families, plus they often use their home addresses on their Companies House info. No one needs to publish anything because it's all readily available from a simple search. Anyone with half a brain doesn't put their home address on those records - all the people I know who own their own companies use their business premises or accountants office, not the place where they live!

Then of course there's all the Backgrid lot of ex reality TV people who let photographers know when they'll be in certain places and when (and then complain about being followed!)

The comment about bullying - I'm not 'ignoring', I thought it was covered pretty well upthread by other posters. It's just criticism of their product. If I go to Gordon Ramsay's restaurant, or see a film starring Tom Cruise, or read a novel by JK Rowling, the 'product', what's being sold to me, is that food/ film/ book. If I think the food's over rated, or the film is boring and his performance wooden, or the plot of the book is hackneyed, for example, I might write a review of it, or comment on social media or on a forum to share my views with others.

With instahuns, THEY are the product. They're wanting others to aspire to how they decorate their homes, how they dress, the make up they wear, the cleaning products they use. Everything about them is on show, even their toilet brushes! So saying that their clothes don't fit or aren't flattering, or that they haven't lost a stone as they claim, they're just photoshopping, or that their dramatically fuller lips aren't due to lipgloss but because they've had fillers, that isn't bullying, it's just comment. No one says an author is being bullied if their work is criticised.

I find the ones who cry about bullies are often pretty unpleasant themselves. By crying bully or troll, making up messages and claiming they've been sent to you, is all just another ploy to elicit sympathy and keep the cash rolling in.

And don't forget, none of them have to do this. There are plenty of other honest ways to earn a living.

If people learn anything from Tattle then tbh they must have been incredibly naive to start with . People in the public eye have always been gifted items for free in the hope it would increase product visibility and sales.

Yet, for some reason, Tattle isn't going after the famous celebrities who make fortunes from those type of associations or the media barons whose magazine pages are full of 'gifted' items being reviewed.

No, they're viciously targeting women and their families ... whilst claiming to care about those very families being exploited.

Did they ever get to the bottom of who established Tattle, who funded it and who runs it? It's odd how little scrutiny, Tattle members put in that direction.

I've never received a single unpleasant comment on Tattle, I feel far more community on there. On MN I've previously been called a liar, fantasist, mentally disturbed, slutshamed and worse. I actually stopped posting entirely for a few years as a result. I post a lot less frequently now and stick to certain threads.

@Quaagars

From obtaining copies of their birth certificates to contacting local businesses to try and obtain info about her or cancel appointments she’s made. Not surprised though as from the IG threads on here before some of them got pulled people were doing the exact same type of shit like publishing addresses etc, it's insane

Someone posted the blueprint of Mrs Hinch's house plans today. 🤯

I completely agree with outing these instahuns for advertising crap without using the correct tags etc. However, some of what I read is so beyond the pale.

Of course there's a sense of community on Tattle. Everyone is united in hatred and jealousy. That shit takes hold of insecure people deeply.

Why would anybody be googling companies house to get these peoples' addresses. That is VERY disturbing behaviour.

It is an honest living. At least the same as working in PR, advertising, sales, promotions etc. Just because you don't like it doesn't make it honest or a career.

Doesn't make it not honest that should read

@Grenlei

I've never received a single unpleasant comment on Tattle, I feel far more community on there. On MN I've previously been called a liar, fantasist, mentally disturbed, slutshamed and worse. I actually stopped posting entirely for a few years as a result. I post a lot less frequently now and stick to certain threads.

Well obviously, if you’re part of the clique you’re ‘safe’ aren’t you? It’s not hard to understand. You’ve established an ‘in-group’ and you have a clearly defined, external target. I don’t see that as in inherent virtue of any community. Would much rather that it’s self-reflecting and is capable of critically interrogating its own practices and traditions.

Someone posted the blueprint of Mrs Hinch's house plans today

Jeez
However much people protest "it's just being worried about the ads, are they being displayed properly, this next level shit underneath is what it's really all about.

It is an honest living. At least the same as working in PR, advertising, sales, promotions etc. Just because you don't like it doesn't make it not honest or a career

This