Husband has a nap, I'm pregnant and no nap allowed

[OneNapForMeNoNapForYou]

It's as tedious as it sounds.
Husband brings toddler back from shops 2 days in a row late, obviously toddler's had power nap so refuses actual nap. Over tired screaming baby.
I say on the second day of this happening that he can deal with the fallout. I'm pregnant with no.3, ill most of the time, throwing up, migraines etc.
Went for a lie down as migraine as ever if I'm tired.
He's obviously not happy he's having to look after toddler, stamps in afyer 1.5hrs, no asking how I am, no conversation, I'm woken up with bright light as he announces he's off to fix the lawnmower.

Toddler left in kitchen as I come out asking what the fuck.
He's already outside.

I yell after him asking if it's really normal to just run out the door and leave your wife I'll, of course then I look mad yelling.

He had naps all last week where he slept all afternoon til after 5pm, I didn't angrily throw kids at him after 1.5 hrs like a petulant toddler.

Maybe 2021 I start treating him how he treats me.

OP, for your username and hilarious responses to why you’re having a third child with him, you’re already a hero – let alone surviving a sicky pregnancy without naps. I want to storm round to yours with blankets, whatever food you can digest, and a human-sized sling to rock you to sleep.

Don’t have any helpful advice for dealing with the dickhead husband I’m afraid. Or for the weaning. Sorry. Any time he tries sneaking off for a nap, follow him with the toddler, turn the lights on, and play a nice game of banging saucepan lids together or play “How loud can we SHOUT?”

A perfectly healthy, I'm assuming fairly young man shouldn't need a nap every day, especially one that lasts several hours. What's he doing that he can't stay awake all day?

@BloggersBlog

Not sure I consider 1.5 hrs a nap. That is a sleep isnt it? And he woke you up after that, how long were you going to be?

But anyway, I think you have been given such great advice on this thread. Not sure why people have to tell you in some posts how great their husbands are though I think when we have prats for husbands.... errr.... we KNOW that, dont need others to tell you what you should expect

How long? As long as she bloody needed!!

@TheOneLeggedJockey

Does he not have a job? Why is he napping all afternoon. He sounds like a selfish arse why are you having a 3rd baby with him?

Read the full thread ya boring bastard

Reading the thread doesn’t provide any illumination to those questions....

Yes it does

🤣 cancel the nap.

Thanks for your offer of food and adult sling sleeps.
Weaning groups and advice are helpful as well thank you.

He's not young, has sore joints that flare up if he gets run down and so is used to being the unwell one, however this is sometimes magic in the fact that it almost disappears when it comes to fixing things/fun with friends.
🤔🧐

He does get flares and I facilitate his rest of course. It's just odd it's not reciprocated.

He's been ok today.
Middle child had their nap on time so we had a lie down together, not hugely restful with a little snuffler gripping onto me for dear life but a rest at least.

My stbxh was an ASSHOLE like this when I was pregnant with my 3rd. No naps or 'sitting around' for me, despite baby having already threatened to come out at 32 weeks. Cunt. He behaved just like you describe @OneNapForMeNoNapForYou, you have my utmost sympathies. It really put the lid on the coffin of my abusive relationship.

@moirarosebabay, I didn't know you'd been married to my stbxh! My story is horribly similar. Narcissist assholes.

He's not young, has sore joints that flare up if he gets run down and so is used to being the unwell one

This comment has stood out to me. He feels entitled to first dibs on a nap / sleep and you are ruining that for him. If you have nap you have to ‘pay’ for it in some way and he makes sure he gets his ‘nap’ in return right??
My advice is he just needs to bloody well get over this selfish complex and let you rest right now as you need it more.
Are you planning on discussing this with him as this attitude will eat away at your relationship?

So how old is not young?

There's lots of negativity here OP about you weaning your 1 year old. As the breastfeeding mum of a toddler I need to say well done for making it to past 1 year whilst pregnant and suffering hyperemesis. That alone is a massive achievement.

I wonder if your DH behaviour has worsened because he he didn't want a 3rd child and feels resentment towards you. Not that that is ANY excuse for the lack of support. But as others have suggested it sounds like you have lots of reasons why couples counseling is a good idea

I think you have had good advice and have a plan of what to do now...

Just wanted to say you have been incredibly patient with posters not reading the thread and being asked repeatedly why you had children with this man.

I hope things get better for you soon

Mine was like that - a show pony who will do anything for anyone. Just not for me.

I say "was" as he isn't here anymore.

[quote everythingbackbutyou]@moirarosebabay, I didn't know you'd been married to my stbxh! My story is horribly similar. Narcissist assholes.[/quote]
He's only been married once but he has already had another child with another woman who (thankfully for her and her kids) left him before Christmas. I still appreciate every day the simple things (like sleeping eating and going to the toilet) I can do without a fight. I was lucky not to be completely insane by the time I left. I was constantly trying to prove he was being unreasonable but my behaviour was totally unrecognisable by the end, so glad to be normal again and so grateful for all the little freedoms I never appreciated before.

He sounds terrible OP. You deserve to have your naps and you should perhaps make this new year the year that you find confidence and assertiveness to make sure you get the rest you need.

@NYNY211

@StiffyByng1

You both sound horrendous and very judgemental, what a horrible thing for you to say! Like as if she can go back and change it? Please think before you post. I have reported both of your posts.

Yep, @Meowchickameowmeow There are some real hateful and low people on here. Ironically, they usually can't take what they dish out. Just report them as I do.

You had three dc with this one, why? Do I get to take a shot now?

If this was a drinking games, I would be so plastered by now 🤣🤣.

Sorry - see my post has been deleted. I guess it's due to the naughty word I used. I'll rephrase:

Why are you having a 3rd child with this wanker?

I'm certain your child is wanted and will be loved but your husband sounds just completely awful, I don't understand why you are continuing the relationship?!

The question isn't why. The question is why not?

Because he can, he's got you right where he wants you OP. First rule of co-habitation, start as you mean to go on and don't suffer foolishness.
Complaining to strangers on the Internet isn't going to resolve this, you need to have it out with him. His 'punishment' is ultimately harming his child.

It sounds like he's punishing you. Did he not want to continue with this pregnancy?

My ex used to loose patience and be grumpy when I was ill. He is much more sympathetic now we are no longer together and he doesn’t have to actually do anything to help!

Your OH sounds like a nob, I don’t blame you for being pissed off 💐

My ex was like this. Would find non-urgent jobs to do in the garden to avoid childcare and housework. Then would return to bed for the rest of the weekend. Or get drunk. I would do everything that needed doing with the children, shopping, cooking and cleaning and if I dared to question it he would cite clearing out the shed as being a top priority.