Neighbour asked us not to do fireworks?

[lockdownqueen]

I'm in a group chat with girls on our new build estate I've sent out a pre warning as hubby has gone and bought some. Everyone was fine and said they will be in there gardens to watch then one of the girls asked us not too as her dog has severe panic attacks.

don't know what to do? Kids have been looking forward to them.

aibu to go ahead and do them?

go for it. my son has panic attacks when dogs run up to him, but people still walk dogs every single day.

I never understand this. If people know their pets are going to be frightened at this time of year, every year then isn't there something they can do about it?
Maybe I'm just being heartless because I'm not a dog person and my cats have never been bothered by them but surely it's to be expected each year.

Tell her you are going ahead.

That's a tough one. Dogs can sometimes die when very stressed by fireworks - something to consider.

Go for it. We are

That’s difficult. You should not have given a heads up if you were not willing to act on feedback

If you’re adamant you’re going ahead them I’d email her and say ok, I was not aware but don’t feel I can let the children done tonight. They will be between 6 and 6.15 if you’d like to take your dog out for a walk during this period so they are not impacted.

It's bonfire night. Lots and lots of people will be doing them, so even if you don't I assume her dog will be affected.

Yes. Message her back & say you're going to be doing them at x o'clock for x time

You are not going to be the only ones letting off fireworks tonight. Anyone with any sense who has sensitive pets will have prepared for it.

Hope your family has a fun evening.

Yes YABU

If I knew it was going traumatise an animal I couldn't do it. I think most kids would understand that tbh.

I am generally very anti home-display fireworks, but if they are taking place only tonight (and especially considering most displays aren't going ahead this year) I'd say do it anyway.

Maybe just respond saying the kids are very excited, but we'll be doing them at x time so she has a chance to soothe her dog at that time.

Fireworks are bloody horrible, I was up until 1am this morning as they had woken up my toddler pretty much straight after he went to sleep, leaving him hysterical. It's a horrible time of year for people with young children, pets or any other issues that means the loudness is frightening.

However, the 5th of November itself, most people know it's coming and accommodate. She can't stop you or anyone setting them off. It's up to you if you want to keep relations friendly or not.

Wish they would ban the bloody things for home use though.

I’d say just do it. At least you gave your neighbours notice, unlike some of our neighbours who have set them off randomly since last Friday!

It's more important to teach your children empathy (and have some yourself) than to set off fireworks.

Can't wait for private firework sales to banned.

Don't do it. A pity you did not know earlier.

You would be very cruel to do this and I'd expect the person not to speak to you again. Sorry if your kids are looking forward to it, but it's well know that fireworks are problematic for some animals and also some people with PTSD, etc. Good lesson for your kids in empathy.

@firstimemamma

That's a tough one. Dogs can sometimes die when very stressed by fireworks - something to consider.

Then as a good dog owner it is on her to train her dog and desensitize it to the sound

@Shitonthebloodything

I never understand this. If people know their pets are going to be frightened at this time of year, every year then isn't there something they can do about it? Maybe I'm just being heartless because I'm not a dog person and my cats have never been bothered by them but surely it's to be expected each year.

You can, you can sedate the dog, the vet can provide something. We had a dog who was so badly impacted they had to be sedated as otherwise her heart may have given out. It was absolutely awful I won’t lie.

The only thing I can think of is to tell her a strict time line and she takes her dog out for that period.

@GuillermoVanHelsing

If I knew it was going traumatise an animal I couldn't do it. I think most kids would understand that tbh.

This. I wouldn’t have the heart to be so cruel.

We have only bought a few anyway, I have told her the time we're doing it and that it won't be for long. I can't do anything else

If you are in the middle of an estate it’s quite antisocial anyway.

Then as a good dog owner it is on her to train her dog and desensitize it to the sound

You clearly have no clue about dogs.

Pity your DH didn’t buy quiet fireworks.

Poor dog.

@Bluntness100

That’s difficult. You should not have given a heads up if you were not willing to act on feedback

If you’re adamant you’re going ahead them I’d email her and say ok, I was not aware but don’t feel I can let the children done tonight. They will be between 6 and 6.15 if you’d like to take your dog out for a walk during this period so they are not impacted.

She was letting them know, not asking permission.

It would be incredibly STUPID to take a sensitive dog out for a walk tonight. The OP is not going to be the only person letting off fireworks!

@lockdownqueen

We have only bought a few anyway, I have told her the time we're doing it and that it won't be for long. I can't do anything else

Yes you can, tighten the time line, stick to it and then suggest she’s out for that period.