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AIBU?

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Original poster

I've got C19. Why is my DH now pretending to be ill??

406 replies

dinosaurusmum · 10/10/2020 19:18

I developed mild symptoms Monday (loss of smell, then taste a few days later) have felt a bit out of sorts but generally fine. Ordered home test anyway. Kept kids off school/nursery as precaution. Husband refused to isolate- "I'm not unwell. No symptoms. Why should I?!" In fairness he works outside and no contact with other others so not really a risk but not the point.

I've been extremely tired all week but thought it was migraine related. Imagine my shock to receive a positive Covid19 test today!

Literally the second I received it, DH has decided he is now absolutely desperately unwell. Has been ill for 2 weeks (err, no you haven't!!) Needs to rest over the next few days and has been generally painful to listen to all day.

I'm still feeling exhausted but getting on with it. He has absolutely no C19 symptoms but as with his usual attacks of hypochondria, I have to suck it up and get on with it. Including taking care of our 1&2 year old ds's whilst he sits on his fucking arse.

Aibu to expect him to grow the fuck up and help and that until he gets a positive test to assume he doesn't have it?! He was honestly 100% fine until my results came back.

OP posts:
OnCandyStripeLegs · 10/10/2020 19:20

Has he been tested?
Has he taken any painkillers?

Onlyonewayout · 10/10/2020 19:22

Sounds like he’s developing an excuse for getting out of his responsibilities.

Sunnydaysstillhere · 10/10/2020 19:23

Order him a test.
Tell him only when it arrives..

Dreamschool87 · 10/10/2020 19:24

@Sunnydaysstillhere

Order him a test. Tell him only when it arrives..
Yes this!
Parker231 · 10/10/2020 19:25

Pass him the DC’s and go and have a soak in the bath before having an early night.

He’ll have to look after them if your not around.

Bettysprocker · 10/10/2020 19:26

You were surprised to be positive with classic symptoms?
He's a lazy arse.

D00MGL00M · 10/10/2020 19:33

I wouldn't bother wasting a test on him as regardless of it comes back negative he now has to isolate anyway.

It sounds like now he's realised he has to home with you for the next few weeks he's trying to wriggle out of looking after his children and keeping the home tidy.

RealityExistsInTheHumanMind · 10/10/2020 19:34

My ex used to be nearly the same. He would play down my illness and complain about me being lazy. As I recovered, he would then become ill and useless and whine 'if I knew you felt like this I would have helped you'

Twat

MyMushroomsInATimeSlip · 10/10/2020 19:39

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

TW2013 · 10/10/2020 19:40

Tell him if he has been ill for two weeks he has probably given it to you but as he wasn't tested he and the dc will have to isolate together so they don't catch it from you as he is probably no longer contagious. You however should isolate from them as much as possible. No time for him to get out the dressing gown of doom.

DeliciouslyFemale · 10/10/2020 19:42

What an utterly selfish and lazy bastard, your husband is. You’re ill and instead of helping and supporting you, he uses it to his advantage so that he can sit on his hole. How can you even share the same bed with that unattractive character?

QuacksInTheDark · 10/10/2020 19:44

He doesn’t want to have to look after you/dc’s if you start getting worse so he’s getting in their ‘first’ so he can be worse than you and you have to look after him. He sounds utterly pathetic, how do you have any respect for him?

Gncq · 10/10/2020 19:46

This is completely absurd.
You're positive for Covid19. Chances are he's going to catch it. It's highly contageous, and in the meanwhile he could infect others, but you're both busy playing games rather than taking this seriously.

RandomMess · 10/10/2020 19:46

Take yourself off to bed and tell him you have to self isolate...

I would be livid tbh!!!

Original poster
dinosaurusmum · 10/10/2020 19:47

Don't know how to respond personally but...

He has no symptoms, has taken no painkillers. Managed to eat his dominoes pizza tonight and drank 4 cans of fosters last night. He's in no way unwell.

He drove straight away to test facility as soon as I got my result.

He refused to isolate from work as he had no symptoms and mine very very mild.

I was surprised at my result as I naively thought they were more of a secondary symptom to the dreaded cough (that I don't have)

He has form for this kind of shit including ringing 999 when we both had a d&v stomach bug (and I was pregnant!!) he told them on the phone he had chest pains (he didn't) so they'd come and check him over. I was absolutely livid. I used to work for the nhs on an acute medical ward so well versed in health care & knew protocol for that kind of thing.

He's now swearing at me for "not taking care of him when he's ill" except he's not Ill. And he's taking himself off to bed, so I have to see to toddler and baby myself. He sees no irony in the fact I am actually infected and he was fine until my diagnosis.

FIL is exactly the same and it gives me the fucking rage.

OP posts:
Asterion · 10/10/2020 19:48

@MyMushroomsInATimeSlip

I would recommend breathing on him and spitting in his food until he has symptoms. Actually give him something to moan about
That is assault.
Mylittlesandwich · 10/10/2020 19:49

Is he still going to work now that you have your result?

Asterion · 10/10/2020 19:49

He's now swearing at me for "not taking care of him when he's ill" except he's not Ill. And he's taking himself off to bed, so I have to see to toddler and baby myself. He sees no irony in the fact I am actually infected and he was fine until my diagnosis.

Oh dear. He sounds like an absolute tool.

wobblywinelover · 10/10/2020 19:49

I had an ex like this, whenever I was ill, which isn't very often, he had to be iller than me. Pathetic. Ended up ending the relationship because he always 'sat on the fence' with his opinions, was weak and a follower, and i'd gone off having sex with him but he blamed me for all the problems in the relationship because I wasn't having sex with him. So it reached a stalemate. Nothing more unsexy than a hypochondriac competitor.

everythingbackbutyou · 10/10/2020 19:50

Entitled fuck. I have the full on rage on your behalf. Does MIL fawn over FIL when he does this?

ceeveebee · 10/10/2020 19:51

“ Husband refused to isolate”
Your husband is a cock
HTH

Fluffycloudland77 · 10/10/2020 19:51

@dinosaurusmum

Don't know how to respond personally but...

He has no symptoms, has taken no painkillers. Managed to eat his dominoes pizza tonight and drank 4 cans of fosters last night. He's in no way unwell.

He drove straight away to test facility as soon as I got my result.

He refused to isolate from work as he had no symptoms and mine very very mild.

I was surprised at my result as I naively thought they were more of a secondary symptom to the dreaded cough (that I don't have)

He has form for this kind of shit including ringing 999 when we both had a d&v stomach bug (and I was pregnant!!) he told them on the phone he had chest pains (he didn't) so they'd come and check him over. I was absolutely livid. I used to work for the nhs on an acute medical ward so well versed in health care & knew protocol for that kind of thing.

He's now swearing at me for "not taking care of him when he's ill" except he's not Ill. And he's taking himself off to bed, so I have to see to toddler and baby myself. He sees no irony in the fact I am actually infected and he was fine until my diagnosis.

FIL is exactly the same and it gives me the fucking rage.

Are you happy in this relationship generally?.
Coffeecak3 · 10/10/2020 19:52

Sorry OP but you picked a right knobhead there.

Sexnotgender · 10/10/2020 19:54

He sounds like a fucking arsehole. Why the hell are you with this useless idiot?

rewild · 10/10/2020 19:54

Fucking men this is so typical. I can't tolerate their nonsense.

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