Boys using the girls toilets.

[tarasharp]

Hi I’d just like people’s opinions on whether they think this is wrong. My granddaughter who’s 15 was upset yesterday because of the new system at school whereby the toilets are mixed. Apparently because of the way they’re all split into groups it’s the only way they can all use a toilet closer to them. My dgd knew of the changes during the holidays and worried about it, she knew the boys would cause problems, which they have.

The problem yesterday was the fact. that a group of boys were upsetting the girls by banging on the doors, shouting rude comments, and basically loitering doing their best to cause mayhem. My dgd suffers from very heavy periods and hated the fact that boys were immediately outside her cubicle whilst she sorted herself out.

My dd phoned the school to complain because there was supposed to be an undertaking that these toilets were monitored during break time and they weren’t. Do you all think this is wrong, and if so, is there any solution? Thanks in advance.

what is that some posters find so hard to understand about someone wanting privacy when dealing with private bodily functions?

no, it is not the boys fault if a girl is embrassed about crinkly paper noises etc, but why can she not just have the basic fucking right to a private cubical where any noise she makes are for her ears only?

PinkLegoBrick I get the impression that you have never had a heavy period, because from your post, you seem pretty clueless about them.

Calling menstruating 15 year old girls disgusting is a pathetic contribution to the thread ime.

@PinkLegoBrick

If a girl is embarrassed by the sound of sanitary wrappers crinkling that is hardly the boys fault. Girls should be taught their periods are nothing to be embarrassed about. Also it's nonsense to suggest a girl might come out of a toilet with blood on her hands. Why on earth would she? That's pretty disgusting - she should wipe it off with toilet paper before exiting the loo.

Girls feel embarrassed about it because boys make fun of them for it. By doing things like banging on loo doors and shouting rude comments when they have access to girls toilet facilities. Or, when those facilities are supervised by staff, storing up information and making rude comments to the girls later, when there are no teachers around.

You can’t “teach” someone not to be embarrassed when they are subjected to ridicule.

If a girl is embarrassed by the sound of sanitary wrappers crinkling that is hardly the boys fault. Girls should be taught their periods are nothing to be embarrassed about.

Oh it's woke bingo. Girls should accept whatever they are told and if they don't like it, they should be 'educated' about how wrong they are. Like the traumatised women in rape crisis centres, who didn't want men there. Let's start early.

Some people on this thread suggest that girls are at fault for being embarassed about periods. Those same people also suggest period blood is disgusting. I'll leave other posters to draw their own conclusions about this person and theie motivations.

Some people on this thread suggest that girls are at fault for being embarassed about periods. Those same people also suggest period blood is disgusting. I'll leave other posters to draw their own conclusions about this person and theie motivations

There is something deeply sinister about the sheer numbers of people determined to ensure that girs have absolutely no where to go on their own. Away from boys and men.

Why does it bother them to the extent that they call them disgusting for something that's happened to every woman here

If a girl is embarrassed by the sound of sanitary wrappers crinkling that is hardly the boys fault

Oh yes, because period shaming is nothing at all to do with the general atmosphere of sexism - misogyny really - that girls grow up in.

And boys and men never ever express disgust at the mention of menstruation.

Sheesh, could you get any more victim blaming or lacking in empathy?

The fact is that it's illegal to use a mixed sex communal toilet block in a school, so why should the girls, or the boys, accept it?

Safe to assume give never been a teenage girl or had a period.

@OutOfDateAppleCrumble

Safe to assume give never been a teenage girl or had a period.

Sorry that was to @PinkLegoBrick

@PinkLegoBrick my DD will be given a menstrual cup as soon as she feels ready for one. You definitely end up with blood on your fingers and it can get under the nails and round the side of your fingers where the nail joins the skin. You need to wash to clean properly - toilet paper will get the worst off.

So hey! She won't be embarrassed by the crinkling sound but she is going to be embarrassed by feckers like you calling blood like that disgusting.

Your mum/birthing parent will have had periods you know. Hope you're disgusted at that person too (and that can count whether you know your birthing parent or not). Your life has depended on someone having periods. How disgusting.

100% complain

Girls are just as bad as boys, so due to that fact your daughter should be accepting of being intimated by males too....as she would accept being intimidated by females

Mumsnet is a place of absolute madness sometimes! Going on about how males are different to females, stronger, taller etc then in the next breath saying there is no difference when it comes to a 15 year olds situation in the toilets.....disgusting!

Mumsnet is a place of absolute madness sometimes! Going on about how males are different to females, stronger, taller etc then in the next breath saying there is no difference when it comes to a 15 year olds situation in the toilets.....disgusting!
Mumsnet has some people who think women should roll over and be nice in almost every situation because NAMALT.

Hi, I’ve still not wrote the letter to the head teacher, having trouble getting his email address. I want to write a short, straight to the point letter perhaps reminding him that the law says toilst cubicles should have their own sink (which dgd assures me they haven’t) and also mention sexual discrimination because the girls are disadvantaged because of periods, and sexual harassment too because of the crude remarks. I’d be very grateful for anyone who could construct a short condensed letter or message me. Tia.

Girls are just as bad as boys

No. No they're absolutely fucking not. It's not the same thing, at all. If you've never had to go through shared bathrooms as a kid whilst at school, you have no place commenting.

@tarasharp

Hi, I’ve still not wrote the letter to the head teacher, having trouble getting his email address. I want to write a short, straight to the point letter perhaps reminding him that the law says toilst cubicles should have their own sink (which dgd assures me they haven’t) and also mention sexual discrimination because the girls are disadvantaged because of periods, and sexual harassment too because of the crude remarks. I’d be very grateful for anyone who could construct a short condensed letter or message me. Tia.

I’m afraid I’m not much help when it comes to letters, but I would add that they’re failing in their social distancing rules, if they’re not supervising the toilets, to the point that groups of boys can be in their harassing girls. They can’t say that they need the toilets to be ‘temporarily’ mixed due to Covid, but then let the boys run rampant.

Can I suggest that you copy your introductory post and repost on FWR? I don’t normally like people posting on multiple threads, but I think you’ll get even better advice over there. Some of the regular FWR are incredible and their knowledge far surpasses anyone here who is trying to convince you that this is not an issue.

Is that feminism support?

tarasharp
Yes, it's the feminism board.

It can get full of quite robust debate but the discussions are usually very interesting and there are lots of posters who know their stuff for situations like this.

Thank you, is there any particular one more suitable?

This one www.mumsnet.com/Talk/womens_rights

Thank you LolaSmiles