If a man says to you..

[Runforyourlifeitsagherkin]

When you text back and forth with a friend from work and explain you are Upset and had a bad day and his response is:

“In another life, I would be down to give you a hug and make you feel better”

You are female, single. And he is married.

What does this mean to you? In what circumstance would you expect that response?

For the sake of voting
YABU= nothing in it
YANBU= he’s after something

Op
down dating is the opposite of punching above your weight it's the deliberate or unconscious act of dating a woman who is not in your league but "below it" in order to feel superiority or needed, Knight in shining armour type thing . For example men who are mega rich Captain of industry types who will happily have a " bimbo" type woman on their arm who is not his intellectual or work equal

maybe they like to be adored and in charge, I don't know ? my friend spent years wondering why she had been dumped for the other woman who " had nothing going for her". ( sorry you did ask me to explain and it's not easy explaining the phenomenon quickly without being un p c )

In another life.. as in, If I didn't have a wife. I'm sure you know that though.

OP do you trust him? Has he been acting differently ? What was it that this woman was upset about? Is she initiating the texts?

Maybe he is just a nice man and does not know how to handle the situation. Maybe he has got into something that has got out of hand ?

I had something like this said to me by a married man years ago and he was happily married. I took it as something said to make me feel better and nothing more.

Sorry that you had to see that OP I'm not sure that it means he would be unfaithful but even so, it doesn't say great things about his character, in my opinion. If he is saying it purely hypothetically then that comes from a place of complete self-interest - it's not really going to help her as it has no practical consequences: it's just to make him feel good about himself. Do you recognise something of a hero complex in other behaviours of his?

if you have the kind of relationship where you feel you can text him about having a bad day has it occurred to you that either he thinks you are already having an emotional affair with him or you actually are already having an emotional affair with him?

if i was his wife i am not sure i would like both the reply he sent you and the fact that you seem to confide your personal feelings to him. Have you thought about this idea?

Affairs are not simply when a physical relationship starts.......

Ive now just clocked that OP is the wife.

I think the text suggests there is already an emotional affair going on with the person to whom the text was sent

How can we know without knowing him? I'd send hugs to a female mate perfectly innocently but some men are creeps.

"In another life ..." - it is a code your dh is using to plan the seed of an idea to the female coworker that they are star-crossed lovers. What a creepy sleazeball. He is grooming her and boundary pushing.

Next time your dh asks you to do something, you could just say wistfully "in another life ..." and walk off dreamily.

men who are mega rich Captain of industry types who will happily have a " bimbo" type woman on their arm who is not his intellectual or work equal, maybe they like to be adored and in charge

Another factor I think is that carefree people sometimes tend to be more fun. Somebody with extreme amounts of financial security can afford a fast car and a 'fast woman'.