Reported to Housing Association

[GrumpyOldFart]

Moved into a block of Housing Association flats around a year ago due to disability requirements. We have a neighbour on the same floor who at the time said she sees everything and knows everything.

Her attitude changed earlier this year when she claimed there was an unpleasant smell from our flat (we have diffusers in the living room and hallway, and also an odour neutraliser in the kitchen and hallway. We hoover/sweep bi-daily and mop kitchen once a week.

She grabbed me a couple of months ago to tell me she had reported us to the HA for the smell, and because we don't answer the door to deliveries and dislikes the knocking on the door (I am predominantly bed-bound and have erratic sleep patterns due to disability and DP doesn't answer the door because of medical conditions).

Now the neighbour has started banging on the windows whilst calling my name and telling me there's a parcel by the door, that my partner isn't living here, that my car alarm was going off.

Except my partner IS very much living here, and my car alarm 110% wasn't going off (DP was in the front room and would have heard it. The alarm is also disabled between certain hours, including when she claimed it was going off). These incidents have been reported also. She also reported me to Social Services for "needing help".

I'd tell her to piss off but this would just antagonise the situation but it's getting truly ridiculous. I could complain about her to the HA, but she would obviously know it was me.

Any ideas would be great...

AIBU/AINBU to tell her to piss off/report her.

Do you know why the previous tenant left? Phone the H.A to find out any details and add your complaint in writing to the case. Good luck x

Poor bloody dog, subjected to diffusers and scent materials all the time. A dog has an incredibly sensitive nose. I would report you to the RSPCA.

Why don't people just clean their house instead of filling it with masking chemicals?

After your repeated (patient) replies to the same questions, could we assume your neighbor is a busybody, please?

In short, report her for harassment, the banging on windows, the parcel annoyance, the nonstop complaints, the cannabis smoking. Report this both as a disabled harassment and as escalating your disabilities.

What you can do, is put a sign on the front door: PLEASE DON'T KNOCK, LEAVE PARCEL IN XX PLACE.

(Stop using so many diffusers they are not healthy)

Best of luck.

Your DP needs to do a bit more.

I'm sorry about your DP , as you will be aware, being registered blind is a catch-all once sight drops below a defined level (as is being registered partially sighted), my DP has 0% sight in one eye and ~5% in the other, with objects appearing as shapes at a distance beyond a couple of metres, blurred vision and poor accuracy in identifying colours. DP also has other dx's. It's totally impossible to get the door, there are also totally valid underlying psychological reasons why this is completely impossible.

@Haffiana

Poor bloody dog, subjected to diffusers and scent materials all the time. A dog has an incredibly sensitive nose. I would report you to the RSPCA.

Why don't people just clean their house instead of filling it with masking chemicals?

This.

We sell diffusers, lots of people use diffusers and they do not use them to cover up smells! I think that's a bit insulting. They have become an alternative to candles at the moment.

I think she might be smelling her teenage grandson's cannabis and is attributing it to you.

I think a lot of these posters here are as bad as your neighbour, getting on your case about other things you've clearly replied to and cleared up. If you've nothing nice or helpful to say then don't say anything at all comes to mind. I agree with the majority though who are saying to keep a log of harrassing/bullying behaviour etc. She sounds like a nightmare tbh, but we all have that one neighbourhood watch wanna be busy body in a block of flats or on a street we live on. Hope you get it sorted. X

I appreciate everyone's postings both supportive and negative, the posts being plain nasty not so, some of which are verging on disablism.

Also, you need to realise that due to my disabilities, I have Rheumatoid Arthritis, Myasthenia Gravis, Post Cholecystectomy Syndrome and other conditions, it takes me up to five minutes to get out of bed, and up to another five to get to the door - that's assuming I don't stumble or fall on the way. It matters not if it takes me half an hour to get to the car as it's not on a time schedule, unlike a delivery, and I have put messages on orders, the first being "Please knock once and wait, disabled", I've now changed it to "Knock once, if no answer leave parcels on the doorstep".

It would help if people read my updates (especially now there's a button to show just my posts) so I didn't have to repeat myself so much.

@79andnotout

I grew up in various HA and council flats. There were loads of individual flats that had their own unique smell wafting out from under the door as you walked past. I think ours smelled of potatoes (we were pretty fresh off the boat from ireland). Isn't the smell of your house, just like your body smell, a unique identifier of where and what you are? That is why I don't like diffusers. There was a family from the west indies downstairs from us in our last place and the smells coming from there were great, much better than potatoes!

Anyway, think I'm missing the point but it seems to me like a lot of people on this thread are giving you a hard time for nothing.

It's true I live in a block of flats and each flat has its own smell coming under the door some are pleasant some are not it's part of living in a flat.

Poor bloody dog, subjected to diffusers and scent materials all the time. A dog has an incredibly sensitive nose. I would report you to the RSPCA

Why don't people just clean their house instead of filling it with masking chemicals

Can you not read? Is your nasty little comment so important that you can't be arsed to read the thread? The dog is with the OPs daughter most of the time. The OP does clean her house. People like you make me sick. Why don't you crawl back under your rock.

Do you open your windows daily. Stale air tends to smell and nothing can hide it. Although it is quite possible it is her relatives smoking she is smelling. You mention your front door is an an alcove. Could you get a free standing parcel post box and put it there (you can get them on amazon). I would stick a note on your door advising delivering people not to knock.

Other than that avoid her, report the smoking and keep a record of everything.

Poor bloody dog, subjected to diffusers and scent materials all the time. A dog has an incredibly sensitive nose. I would report you to the RSPCA. Why don't people just clean their house instead of filling it with masking chemicals?

One reason is that it's become a thing on here to constantly berate people if they do smell- so people who don't shower twice a day, wash their towels after every wash, hoover all the time are told they are smelly, and need to constantly clean/deodorize. Same with houses- anyone who doesn't constantly clean should be embarrassed. A whole industry has developed around people shaming others for smells- 'you've gone nose blind' is a genius bit of marketing as it suggests that even if you can't smell something, you still smell (and so need product). Even more so for people who have animals who are told their houses smell constantly even though they clean.

The OP is clear she does clean/they clean together the house to a normal standard, I don't think a couple of diffusers count as animal abuse.

This thread is an eye-opener, and not about the OP!

Trying to mask smells with synthetic scents never works. If you like artificial scents in their own right, fair enough.
There's really no substitute for fresh air, though. Not getting enough air circulating in your home is really unhealthy.

She is mad as a box of frogs. Report to the HA. Keep a diary of everything and if you can get a video or audio recording of the harassment. Write down time and date and also how it has impacted on you/how it made you feel.

I suspect the reason you haven't heard anything else from the HA about her complaints is that she is a serial complainer.

I'm sure you already know but some essential oils in diffusers are toxic to cats and dogs so please check before use.

• Poor bloody dog, subjected to diffusers and scent materials all the time. A dog has an incredibly sensitive nose. I would report you to the RSPCA.

Why don't people just clean their house instead of filling it with masking chemicals?*

Why don't people read my posts before writing questions that I've already answered?

The diffusers are not on all the time, they are set on timers. Also, I use one or two drops of essential oil, it's not a strong smell.

Assuming we live in a filthy dirty flat is bonkers and I have no fucking idea how some people are arriving at that conclusion.

@GrumpyOldFart I get the being able to take the dog out (when you have it) but not get the chance to reach the door when a courier arrives esp since many give you about 2 seconds before they get thumpy with the door.

What about one of those Ringo type doorbells where you can answer telling them to leave it on the door, you can also record your neighbour if she is being abusive.

I'm sure you already know but some essential oils in diffusers are toxic to cats and dogs so please check before use.

Yes, have been using essential oils for years, originally for massage and checked toxicity to animals before I started using them in the diffusers. The smell is a lot "cleaner" than the plugins etc too.

Does your HA allow dogs? I think you just need to wait out the HA and SS inspections. There have been some good suggestions about having parcels delivered to a click & collect point for your daughter to bring.
I suggest stopping the diffuser and other smells for a few weeks. Then you can evaluate if there's more you can do to eradicate the dog smell (change of diet, more showers and dental hygiene etc).

I think the ndn just doesn’t like the sound of your front door opening/shutting and is trying to bully you because of it.

OP, is your neighbour thinking you’re responsible for the pot smell?
I too am registered blind. I have a tiny bit of light perception in the corner of my right eye so I can tell if it’s day or night, that’s it. I also have a diagnosed mental illness. I am a single parent and I run a household by myself. I have to get someone to help me shop and I get someone to help me with cleaning for an hour a week but I do the rest. There are plenty of things you can do if you can’t see, I know, I’ve spent the last 38 years doing them, and answering the door is the least of them.

Also, e the parcels, Have you explored the posability of asking your HA if you can get a safe installed outside the flats? Then you could give the code to the parcel delivery people and ask them to leave it in there so nobody get’s disturbed, including you. You’d have to change the code regularly but it might be a good solution.

But OP, why do you have a dog if neither of you are capable of looking after it properly? That doesn’t seem very fair on the poor pooch to me.

Sorry you are having this OP, life will be hard enough with your issues.

With the door knocking I'd usually suggest a ring type doorbell, or if not affordable we got a £5ish cheapo stick on doorbell which the sound part just plugs into any socket. I know this might not be doable budget wise, but worth looking at if it is. That plus a sign asking not to knock might help? You'd know someone was at the door but batshit neighbour wouldn't hear.

Try to write down dates/rough times and any previous incidents, then keep a log as PP said. Get onto your housing officer, ask for details of the complaint (what the smell is for example) and give them your side. That way any further complaints against you or issues you have are not leaving you on the backfoot. Our HO made it clear they can't do much without logs and they will usually ask you to keep a diary of antisocial behaviour.

If you have the strength to push for more help please do, it really sounds like you should be getting more support.

Does your HA allow dogs?

Is that what this thread is about? No. Do you think it might be possible that the OP knows whether she can have a pet or not, and doesn't need you helpfully piping up.

@oakleaffy I will shock you, I don't have odour problems in the house but I LOVE scented candles and diffusers, and have something on most of the time. So my house may smell like baked bread or autumn leaves or fresh cut roses. Not everyone wants their house smell of nothing.

OP, a lot of people dont get the interest in home scents, so just ignore. Nothing wrong with a diffuser on! There is a reson they sell them.

I think your neighbour sounds very difficult.

Could you try and arrange a meeting with them and the HA? (With your log book)!

It may not be possible due to the HA rules and cost but could you explore getting a ring doorbell?
Someone can talk to whoever is at the door instantly and you have the added security of seeing what is going outside your own door.

Hi OP x Are you able to have a parcel box put next to your door? I have one out the front of.my house with a 'parcel box' sign on it. It works a treat and the delivery men simply take a photo of delivered parcel in the box for proof of delivery. As for your neighbour I would write a log of their behaveour ready for when you need to officially complain. I wish you all the best x