Friend wants the same ring as me

[anon1387]

My friend is engaged and she likes my engagement ring (OH letting her pick her ring) and has asked if I mind if she gets the same one. I've said I kind of do mind as mine is really specific and personal for me and my husband (has a specific engraving on it). AIBU to ask her to get something else? There's literally so much to choose from!

I would mind. It’s not like you had a solitaire and she chose one too. That’s fair enough.

If this problem is a reflection of your worries, you’re lucky.
It impacts on you .... nada. Nothing. Nowt. Zilch. Zippo. Zero.

Does it really matter? How often will you sit beside her with your hand outstretched?

She could have had it done without mentioning it to you and my guess is you’d have hardly noticed.

I would hate that. And I would tell her. If she couldn't respect that she would no longer be a friend.

I would think it was Very Weird and would be v pissed off. If it was just a usual engagement ring, you wouldn't really have a leg to stand on. Let’s face it, there’s only so much variation in ring design in the world! However with the special stones and - even more personal to you - a special quote engraved then I cannot fathom how she thinks its ok? I don’t really understand this last bit - if it is for example a pet name you use between the two of you or a quote from a film you saw on your first date, why on earth does she want that on her ring??

Her lack of imagination is properly shite.

Yes I agree that's werid. I'd mind too!

I wouldn’t be happy at all .. it’s special to you and your oh
Tell her you do mind and maybe look at other ( not as nice as yours ) rings and steer her away
She has a cheek tbh it’s not like it’s any old ring

I think it’s definitely odd. What did you say when she asked if you minded?

It is very weird OP and I would not like it.
100% YANBU

If she's a good friend I would sit down with her and help her design her own

I’d find it a bit weird and I definitely wouldn’t do it to a friend of mine so I’m not sure why everyone else is saying it’s not weird.

Oh it's just a ring OP, I would be more concerned if she wanted your bloke! Hate materialistic things like this, so I think Yabu.

How did she take it when you said you did mind?

It doesn’t change your ring so I don’t see the problem. It’s quite strange that she can’t find any other ring that she likes though.

Weird, weird, weird. YADNBU.

Can we see the ring please? I love an unusual engagement ring but not enough to copy them

So what would she have done when she'd got engaged if you and your bespoke ring hadn't come along for her to like? Tell her to have a think about that and get a different ring, or you'll be reconsidering the friendship

Oh I was all ready to say you were being unreasonable (I was wrongly assuming it would be some kind of diamond) but you’re not at all - she is being really weird! I would definitely mind that.

Off topic really and I know you probably won’t want to (it is so unique sounding that it probs is outing) but I would love to see what your ring looks like now!

If the ring is as personal as you say, I would not be impressed if my friend copied.

I had a friend who copied most things I purchased for my son, for her son, it didn't bother me, she bought the same clothes as me, again it's a free country, but to imitate something so personal, would annoy me, immensely.

I’d be a bit annoyed about that

I think it’s really weird

I'd be pissed off about that. Doesn't she have the imagination to design her own?

Let's see.

I think if you had a ring specifically designed for you she is being unreasonable to ask to copy it, and kinda cheeky too.

YANBU

That would piss me off - especially if I had to stand by and watch other people complimenting her on her 'original' design. No thanks

It is a bit odd, but it is a form flattery.