How does this text make you judge my recently ended relationship?

[swervedmrnasty]

Dear Swerved

It is important for me that you know the effects you had on my self esteem during our relationship

1. Kissing a squaddie in a bar and getting an ex boyfriend undressed when staying at his place while I was looking after my grieving kids in 2017

1. Going to the pub in 2018 with no knickers on whilst I was working 400m away, getting chatted up by an ex con and coming home with their number

1. Calling me a ‘cunt’ last Christmas in front of all the children

1. Calling me a ‘cunt’ after the skiing holiday

That accumulation is when I eventually gave up on us: I hope you learn something from me pointing this out.

Regards

Mr Nasty (or is he.... hence AIBU?)

Those are pretty crappy things to have done. 1 and 2 particularly. He should have pulled you up on them at the time but what the hell were you on?

Well did you do that stuff?

Is this a reverse?

Obvious reverse is obvious

Only having that side of things does not show you in the best of lights.

If you did those things while in a relationship with this man, then I would say you were being unreasonable, and it’s fair enough for him to bring them up. But there are two sides to every story.

Oooh interesting.

See I'm wondering if when he blathers to others will they believe?

Seems plausible from first round of replies!

I'd say it's a good job your relationship is recently ended. Based on that text alone and making lots of assumptions I'd say you are both better off without each other.

What do you think op? I am guessing there is a back story...or a 'gotcha' moment coming up?

🍿

If you’ve done the things he stated in the text then the only thing he is unreasonable for is only breaking up with you now!

If you have done what he says then that text's fine and a lot nicer than I'd put it

This is a reverse. Don’t send it. She doesn’t give a shit. It makes you sound whiny. Block and move on. In the wild off chance it’s not a reverse - block and move on. Regardless of whether this is a reverse or not, block and move on. This relationship is done.

Ah, there we are, so did he make this all up? Look, some people do this when they break up. It is very nasty if he made it up. Whether or not other people believe it is really hard to say, as, with respect, we don't know you IRL. You could seem the type or not at all. I hope people don't believe any of the lies he tells about you though, if he does decide to spread lies about you.

Have you replied?

The relationship was ended by me.
3 months ago.

Did you do the things he has said in the text?

If you did all this then he’s well rid of you and you deserve zero sympathy.

Did you do those things or not, OP?

If it had mentioned snogging Shakespeare and a trip to mars then of course it's not plausible but this is a list of things that someone might well have done. Without knowing you it's hard to say whether a third party would think this was out of character for you or not

If this is a reverse thread then you're well shot, if you did in fact do these things then he's well shot. Either way the relationship was quite toxic.
Also if he's a fantasist and you didn't do these things you are well shot too.

I'm confused. Were they all done by your ex? By you? I'm not sure how that message proves any affect on your self-esteem, it's just a list of shit things.

@swervedmrnasty

The relationship was ended by me. 3 months ago.

I don’t think it matters. Maybe they felt they supported you despite these acts and needed to point out what you did and why you are not necessarily better than them. Which is maybe how the felt you felt when you dumped them then.

It’s not a reverse?
Is he correct in what he says?

What are genuinely trying to get out of this thread OP?

No point to this whatsoever