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AIBU?

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Original poster

To speak to the school re. this

196 replies

peaches99 · 18/07/2020 17:33

Name changed for this one, its a bit outing. My dd of 14 has been very bored during lockdown (just like most of us). She has been wanting to experiment with her hair, and I have let her........to a degree!
She even said she wanted to shave her head at one point; yes right, over my dead body!
She has been staying at her friends for a few days, and guess what, she walked in with a totally shaved head!!!
It was such a shock, after questioning it appears that she has been chatting to some of her male friends from her school about this. When she stayed with her friend they met these boys at the park, and one of them took along his clippers and shaved her head!
I am distraught, surely this is not allowed, she is 14.
Please help me, does anyone of you know if I can speak to the school re. this?

OP posts:
Walkingtheplank · 18/07/2020 17:35

I dont understand what it has to do with school?

CuppaZa · 18/07/2020 17:35

Talk to them about what? The fact that she will be attending school with a shaven head? Does a number one shave come under their ‘extreme hair styles’ ban? Are you worried they will send her home for an extreme hair style?

PawPawNoodle · 18/07/2020 17:36

What are the school supposed to do about it? You're the one responsible for her.

CuppaZa · 18/07/2020 17:36

I don’t know what this has to do with the school

LBOCS2 · 18/07/2020 17:36

Why do you think it's anything to do with the school?

And what do you mean, not allowed? It's only hair. It'll grow back.

NotShiny · 18/07/2020 17:37

I dont get the link with school either. Hasnt school just finished for the summer?

ilovesooty · 18/07/2020 17:37

It's nothing to do with school.

Spanishmama0114 · 18/07/2020 17:38

I'm not sure what the school would do.
DD has obviously asked the boy to do this so I think the only person you should have an issue with is her

Cattiwampus · 18/07/2020 17:38

Is it against school rules?
In which case, she’ll be suspended until her hair grows a bit, and as the holidays have started, she’s got a few weeks.

BoggledBudgie · 18/07/2020 17:38

At 14 your daughter is old enough to decide what to do with HER hair.

Finfintytint · 18/07/2020 17:38

It’ll grow back.

TheFormerPorpentinaScamander · 18/07/2020 17:38

Its hair. It will grow back.

Idontgiveagriffindamn · 18/07/2020 17:38

Do you feel like she was pressured into it? Or are you concerned that it will fall into the extreme haircut category?
If it’s the first it sounds like it’s been something she’s wanted to for a while and that someone has enabled it rather than pressurised her.
But my take is she’s 14 so old enough to decide what she wants to do with her hair.

Freddiefox · 18/07/2020 17:38

Are you saying that the boys forced her to shave her hair? Otherwise I’m not really sure what
You expect the school to do.

She’s 14 it’s her choice

labyrinthloafer · 18/07/2020 17:39

I can see you feel upset so Flowers but take a deep breath - she wanted to do this and it is a non-permanent change.

The school will probably have some stupid hair rules so she will need to comply with whatever they are by September or face school's pointless bossy boots consequences.

Beyond that, I don't think it can be a school matter as it wasn't done in school, and I am not sure what the misdemeanour is if she requested it happen.

MrsTWH · 18/07/2020 17:39

I understand you weren’t expecting it and it came as a shock but, and I mean this kindly - it’s just hair and you need to calm down!
It will grow back and will be fine/pixie crop length when she goes back in September.

PatriciaHolm · 18/07/2020 17:40

oh it'll grow back.

School aren't going to get involved. It didn't happen on school premises, or presumably in school uniform.

Be lovely and cool for summer ;-)

Cabinfever10 · 18/07/2020 17:40

If your dd agreed to have it done then at 14 there is nothing anyone can do however if it was done without her consent then it would be assault and a police matter.
Why would you want to involve the school?

annie987 · 18/07/2020 17:40

If you are saying this boy shaved her head against her will then it is possibly assault and a matter for the police. If she consented, it’s not a police matter.
Either way, nothing to do with the school.

nettytree · 18/07/2020 17:41

I wish I would have the guts to shave my hair off. She's 14, thats the time to experiment. Relax. It's got 6 weeks to grow back before school.

annie987 · 18/07/2020 17:41

Cross post with Cabinfever10- almost identical responses!

Pinktruffle · 18/07/2020 17:41

The school have no jurisdiction over what students get up to outside of school if they are not in uniform. I don't know what you expect them to do?

In 6 weeks her hair will be long enough not to break any school rules so you have no real need to speak to them.

lifesalongsong · 18/07/2020 17:42

I'm sure you can speak to the school but to say what?

40andginger · 18/07/2020 17:42

She's shaved her head and will probably regret it
There's nothing you can do it's certainly not the schools responsibility
It's done

Cattiwampus · 18/07/2020 17:42

What is she saying about it?

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