AIBU to think this is anything but proof he has cheated.

[Cornnuts]

Sorry not AIBU but posting for traffic. I was looking for some old files on my husbands laptop that I needed. I have found screenshots of text messages he received in September 2018 from two different sources one saying ‘you’re test came back negative’ and the other ‘you’re clear’ from googling the numbers one is linked to government NHS chlamydia testing, the other is free test.me which is an STD testing site. We have been married 2 years and together 10. I’ve been lying here all night going through every possible scenario that somehow this has an explanation. There isn’t anything I can think of apart from he has cheated. I don’t know what to do or think. I will talk to him today but I don’t know if I’m ready to hear what this means. I love him and thought he loved me. We are trying for a baby. I just can’t even think that he would do this. Sorry not even really a question. Suppose just looking for a hand hold and somewhere to vent.

Ok - so he doesn’t take it out to work all day, but he does take it to buy condoms and then subsequently use it to conveniently store the receipt
All too convenient

Again your thinking is strange. My DP doesn't take his wallet to work all the time, he doesn't take it to the shops all the time. But he does sometimes. Depends on lots of things, what he's wearing, whether he can be bothered carrying it around, whether he has a lot of cash to carry around!

Stepping into the realms of impossibility here in your world but perhaps he happened to have his wallet that day because he wouldn't be home for days? Went off for the week away to cheat work, and forgot all about the receipt when he got home!

@missrks I was agreeing with your comment, the rest was for Cheshirehotmum. Thought I'd better clarify lol.

I got visually "diagnosed" with a possible STI by an A&E doctor when presenting with unrelated symptoms

I got tested in line with their recommendation

I didn't tell my partner

It came back negative

Thank you to those who have been supportive. I’m telling my sister today so I have irl support and can put things in place before I speak to him, as silly as it sounds it just feels like once I’ve told someone irl it’s actually happening.

I’m sorry for my convenient story to those who have questioned it. I looked in his wallet last night After he had gone to bed. The receipt says ‘chemist goods’ not ‘condoms’ which is why I am assuming he hasn’t gotten rid of it. However that’s what boots ring condoms through as and the pricing is the same. So no I haven’t just found all this evidence I’ve spent all day and night looking whilst my life has crashed around me.
Thank you again to those who have been supportive .

Boots itemise their receipts with the product - condoms are listed as condoms. They don’t use generic anonymous terms - despite my ‘age’ I do partake purchase them myself on occasion.

I'm so sorry OP. Are you in a strong position financially? Really glad to hear you have some real life support from your sister. I think his reaction will tell you everything you need to know.

Watch out for "the script" being used on you - if you google "mumsnet the script" you'll find it

@BobbieDraper not quite. The OP's intention would normally written as 'could be anything but proof' but what's here is not incorrect.

Yeah Boots actually itemise their items on the receipt and condoms do definitely get named rather than 'chemist goods' could be he has paid for a prescription item or something over the counter rather than condoms?

Boots itemise their receipts with the product - condoms are listed as condoms.

I just read someone posted on a different forum (over a year ago) laughing about how they loved that condoms were listed as 'chemist goods' on boots receipts.

Not sure I'm allowed to screan shot or name the forum. Easily found with a quick google.

I'm sorry OP. You must feel sick to your stomach.

So sorry this is happening to you. Definitely put a hold on trying for a family until this is sorted out

Hope you're able to talk to your sister, then tell him what you know

Sorry to read your update OP. I'm afraid it doesn't look good.
I'm glad you're talking to you sister for some support IRL.

It seems strange that he would get tested for chlamydia separately. That suggests he either had UTI symptoms that could be consistent with chlamydia so the GP told him to get tested or became aware that you could be asymptomatic so decided to get a test or someone from his past got in touch to say that they had it. Maybe he saw the free test packs in your GP (ours used to have a box at reception) and decided to do it. I'm fairly sure that the posters for the kits used to say something along the lines that you could be a carrier for years without knowing so everyone should get tested as it can cause infertility. I'm guessing that having kids was probably on his mind 2 years ago if you were getting married. It doesn't necessarily mean that he cheated.

It's also odd that he would get tests done from 2 different services at the same time. Did he get tests for other things? Why not get all the tests by the NHS or the site? Maybe he did the chlamydia test because of the campaign then decided he ought to get checked for everything else once he realised that you can carry STIs without symptoms. If he had cheated and needed testing for everything, why didn't he just go to the GUM clinic or do all the tests with the online company?

I would ask him and see what his reaction is. He's hardly likely to have a story prepared after 2 years.

Oh, I'm sorry, it seems things have moved on and I cross-posted. That doesn't sound great if he is lying about work trips

So sorry this is happening to you. Hope your sister is a good support for you.

I hate these men.

OP - at least you have found the evidence before you became pregnant. You can make your decisions with a clear head and do what's best for you alone.

So sorry. This doesn't look good. I can empathise as when I found something to show my XDP was cheating, I felt as if my world had fallen apart.