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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think a 2 year old should walk?

170 replies

blanche85 · 05/07/2020 21:20

I have a 2 year old who will not walk anywhere! I have a pram,obviously,but he absolutely will not go in it - I've tried everything...toys,snacks,distraction...nothing.

If I manage to get him in there (with a huge struggle) he will just go crazy and scream and go red...you get the picture.

Thing is,I don't drive and I live a good 30 minute walk away from shops/park/anything...

The main problem is when I have to get heavier shopping...all of that plus him is just killing me.

He is generally very clingy and wants to be carried everywhere.

So...any tips to get him to stay in his pram? Enjoy it even?

Thank you

OP posts:
BankofNook · 05/07/2020 21:25

When my DC went through this 0hase I told them that they had to go in the buggy until we got to wherever it was we were going (e.g., supermarket) and then once we got there they could come out and go on their reins, then they had the option of either get in the buggy under their own steam or they could be put in it and strapped in. There were some tantrums but for the most part it worked.

On days where I wasn't limited for time and/or didn't have bags to carry I let them walk (with reins) and just accepted that it would take longer to get where we were going, the good part of this was that it helped build up their stamina so that they were able to walk for longer and longer periods.

Cottipus · 05/07/2020 21:25

Have you tried a trike or something along those lines? I have a 2.5 yo who loves being carried, you have my sympathies.

HTruffle · 05/07/2020 21:25

That sounds difficult. Could you consider one of those push along trikes?

MissRabbitIsExhausted · 05/07/2020 21:26

We used a trike when dd refused her Pram around 18 months. Made things so much easier, she loved it!

bridgetreilly · 05/07/2020 21:27

I'm confused. Do you want him to walk or do you want him to be pushed?

He certainly should not be carried. That is ridiculous.

Stannisbaratheonsboxofmatches · 05/07/2020 21:28

Trike is a good call. DS went in one of those trikes with sides and a handle a lot as it avoided naps at the wrong time. Or you can get those really ergonomic carriers that might make it possible to carry him sometimes.

AlongCameRosie · 05/07/2020 21:29

We have started using the trike on trips where I don’t need much shopping (just fill my backpack) and LO gets so excited and asks to go on her bike as soon as she sees it. Another plus is she doesn’t fall asleep in it so no chance of a danger nap! I got mine off marketplace for £20 last year.

GreyishDays · 05/07/2020 21:29

Have you tried a scooter? Mini mico type of thing.

LaurieMarlow · 05/07/2020 21:29

Raisins keep mine in the buggy. It’s the only way, Blush

GreyishDays · 05/07/2020 21:29

*micro

Original poster
blanche85 · 05/07/2020 21:29

I've tried a trike - was not a success unfortunately! And I can't really talk to him about it either - he's just under 2 - 22 months actually,I've tried explaining to him and reasoning with him,but he doesn't understand...just wants to be held/carried constantly.

He won't even go in the shopping trolley 😣

OP posts:
bridgetreilly · 05/07/2020 21:29

Also, hard as it may seem, this is the point at which you really need to be making it clear to your child that you are the parent and you are in charge, not him. So yes, he'll scream and go red. Ignore him. Let him have his tantrum, then make him do what you want anyway. Don't give in, because the only thing that teaches him is how to get you to give in.

Original poster
blanche85 · 05/07/2020 21:30

@bridgetreilly

I'm confused. Do you want him to walk or do you want him to be pushed?

He certainly should not be carried. That is ridiculous.

Either!
OP posts:
ThePlantsitter · 05/07/2020 21:31

You can't carry him. So he has to go in the pushchair. YOU need to believe this before he will. He is going in the pushchair whether he likes it or not. He's safe in there, he doesn't have to be happy.

NoIDontWatchLoveIsland · 05/07/2020 21:32

I would stop carrying him asap. He will only get heavier and the longer it goes on you will have an increasingly unfit large child who thinks the only mode of travel is on mums hip.

Balance bike or scooter. I wouldnt start encouraging a pram over the age of 2 except when you want them to nap in it.

Mummyof2girls5and10 · 05/07/2020 21:32

Maybe try a parent facing pushchair so he can see you. And like some others have said a trike. Some trikes are really good and strong and even cove with storage baskets under the seat and rain covers

TheMiMit · 05/07/2020 21:34

I promise you it's a phase. Mine used to kick off about being in buggy and want to to walk a
everywhere instead. Then hit two (when he actually could walk properly) and would kick off about being carried. It's like they are desperate for freedom and then, when they have it, it terrifies them (or they are just lazy blighters!) He's 7 now and that all feels like a distant memory (although bet he would still get carried now if he wasn't nearly as tall as me!)

NoIDontWatchLoveIsland · 05/07/2020 21:35

I dont see why what he wants is coming into it? Of course he wants to be carried, tough shit! My 3 year old wants to eat cake for lunch - another example of tough shit.

You are the parent. You make him do it.

Ps apologies if you have some physical disability that means you are quite literally unable to manhandle a 22m old into a trolley seat

daisypond · 05/07/2020 21:36

Just double checking that you mean a pushchair or a buggy. Surely you don’t mean a pram, do you?

Napqueen1234 · 05/07/2020 21:37

Clearly giving him the option- walk or pram. If he starts to paddy or refuses strap him into the pram and get in with your day. When he’s calmed down offer him to stay in or get out and walk nicely. If he messes around back in the pram. It’s not a battle of wills you are the parent you decide!

Cheeseislife2020 · 05/07/2020 21:37

I think I’d just let him scream I’m afraid. You get him in there using chocolate buttons or crisps or whatever and then you just walk briskly whilst he screeches. He will soon realize

Watermelontea · 05/07/2020 21:37

My daughter went through a stage like this, I had to take the pram everywhere. I hated it! I once went to the supermarket with her in the pram and balanced the basket on it as I could t hold it any longer, and it fell backwards as I went to grab something - she was absolutely fine I’ll add but it shocked her and I was very upset!

She did grow out of it pretty quickly, but during that period of time whenever I took her to the park to meet a friend and she wanted to go and play, I told her that as she hadn’t walked there she wasn’t playing either unless she walked home. She agreed (though tried to go back on the deal, obviously being a crafty two year old!) but I refused to move with her in the pram. She then started to walk.
We did that same arrangement (minus the bluffing on her part) for a while, until I told her that there was no park/wherever we we’re going, unless she walked.
I always made sure they were still short walks, as she was still little, and I imagine her legs got quite tired when one of my steps is about three of hers. We built up the time, after the tantrums about not wanting to walk, stopped.

MrsArchchancellorRidcully · 05/07/2020 21:38

At that age you need to show him you are in charge. Start when you're not in a rush to go anywhere. Give him choices; you need to sit in the buggy to the shops or walk on reins. Which would you prefer? If he insists on being carried then you tell him he loses choices and you decide he is going in the buggy. And strap him in. You must then ignore a tantrum. He won't hear you anyway.

Even if that means you have an embarrassing walk to the shops. Sod it. Feel free to bribe if you want but do not give in and do not pick him up. At the shops you could say you can stay in the buggy with a sweet (or whatever) or you can get out and go on reins and walk.

Keep going and be consistent. He's young but not too young to get the message. I used a time out step for mine at that age and one day we had 28 returns to time out. Now aged 8 I just have to count 😁

Not saying use time out for this but you have to be persistent and never give in.

One thing I did with mine was use a sling from newborn. By the time mine were 18m or do they went in a toddler sling on my back with my hands free. Could you do that? You can even get pre school ones which my then 6 year old used to pop in occasionally 😁

Cheeseislife2020 · 05/07/2020 21:39

Also you could try and get hold of a forward facing push chair so he can see you? Or you can get iPad ‘arms’ so you could put peppa on as a treat whilst he is in there?

Ohnoherewego62 · 05/07/2020 21:39

can you give him something to play with? A ball or car of something to distract him along the way.

Does he try and kick a football or go and down kerbs?

I would try him again with the trike and give him a load of stickers to attach to it. If that fails, tie some balloons.

It could be he likes what he can see from.yoir height. But at the end of the day, it isn't negotiable. You have things to do and he needs to do what.you need him to do.