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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Don't want to Zoom with friends

137 replies

Petals23 · 22/05/2020 07:50

6 friends are organising Zoom drinks tonight for the first time during lockdown. I really don't want to participate, it's not my thing. We've been in touch with each other via WhatsApp etc. Anyone else said no to zooming?

OP posts:

Aretheystillasleepbob · 22/05/2020 07:52

I duck in and out of a regular weekly one that a grp of friends have. Most of us do the same. I don’t regret the ones I join tho sometimes beforehand I’m not that up for it.

GeorgieTheGorgeousGoat · 22/05/2020 07:53

Don’t then. Personally I think it’s lovely and I enjoy it. I think it’s a bit sad that you don’t but each to their own.

BigSandyBalls2015 · 22/05/2020 07:56

I’ve had enough of all that now, the novelty has worn off. Very little to say as none of us are doing much!

ChasingRainbows19 · 22/05/2020 07:56

I've not done any of it. I've still kept in revaluation touch with my friends and family but don't feel the need to do it on zoom. Strong friendships can survive anything and also you can now meet up individually outside .
Everyone's different just do whatever you want to.

ChasingRainbows19 · 22/05/2020 07:57

*regular touch

Packamack · 22/05/2020 07:58

Zooming with friends is saaaaaaad. Tell them you're deep into a gripping novel and can't spare the time.

Locked down extroverts are a pain in the arse.

BlueJava · 22/05/2020 08:13

It's fair enough to not join in if you don't want to. But perhaps you're just writing it off as you think you won't enjoy it - it can be nice to speak with friends for a catch up.

Stingeray · 22/05/2020 08:18

It's the closest thing we have to just hanging out together and chatting. Might not be your thing but do bear in mind that some people need this for their mental health. Especially those alone or with small children all day. I'm not always the most sociable but I do make an effort to go to zoom events and check in on my friends to see how they are holding up. You can read faces much better than voices or in a text message. I do prefer the relaxed chats where we are all doing our own thing (craft projects, prepping food, painting nails etc) and dipping in and out of the conversation.

ShandlersWig · 22/05/2020 08:20

Like a pp, even when I cant be arsed to join, I end up enjoying myself. Why not give it a go, and if you dont like it, dont do it again?

ChocolatelyAsFuck · 22/05/2020 08:23

Zooming with friends is saaaaaaad. Tell them you're deep into a gripping novel and can't spare the time. Locked down extroverts are a pain in the arse.

What a nasty comment. Why bother having friends at all, or are you one of the posters who thinks having friends is weird and unnecessary?

BikerChick91 · 22/05/2020 08:23

I got Zoom fatigue...

It’s a nightmare for an introvert. I already have to do my work on Zoom like software everyday. I’m really fed up with also getting FaceTimed at all hours or these Zoom get togethers. I think people split into two camps, the ones who love it and the ones who find it intrusive.

pictish · 22/05/2020 08:24

I’ve done a couple of Zoom meet-ups with friends and have to say I’m not fond (of Zoom, not my friends) - it’s disjointed, laggy, terrible sound quality and there’s no natural flow of conversation.
I do it because I want to show my friends I care...I don’t really like it though and have swerved a couple because I just cba with it.

user1487194234 · 22/05/2020 08:35

Its your call, if you don't want to do it fair enough.

I am sure you are supporting your friends in other ways.

I do enjoy them,I am doing 4 a week,it is not the same a seeing people,but it is better than nothing.

But I am very close to family and friends,and very sociable

wehaveafloater · 22/05/2020 08:41

I don't mind video chats with close family, but hate it with anyone else. It's become a way for people to brag about their homes or amount of books etc in my view. I have my cameras covered with a bulldog clip and will pop in and say I'm on a call and I'll call them back later .

namechangenumber2 · 22/05/2020 08:50

I find them hard work unless we're planning on doing a quiz or something. I'm quite introverted and can't ever work out when to speak!

MouseMartin · 22/05/2020 08:51

'Zooming with friends is saaaaaaad. Tell them you're deep into a gripping novel and can't spare the time.'

That made me laugh.

ShirleyPhallus · 22/05/2020 08:54

Zooming with friends is saaaaaaad. Tell them you're deep into a gripping novel and can't spare the time.

Fantastic way of making yourself sound 100% weirdo, great idea.

nowornever1 · 22/05/2020 08:56

I'm sat in front of a laptop from 6.30-5 so when I finish I refuse to do zoom calls because I'm fed up of starting at s computer or phone

So don't join in if you don't want to

Frazzled2207 · 22/05/2020 08:59

I did quite a few in the early weeks but the novelty has definitely worn off. That said I am enjoying one to one FaceTimes.

Waiting1987 · 22/05/2020 09:00

Can't believe how fuking rude people are being about this. Some people love all these video chats and other people would rather stick pins in their eyes. It doesn't make you weird/sad/tragic to like something other people don't.

Do what makes you happy OP.

SRS29 · 22/05/2020 09:01

We had a zoom call last weekend with friends for Eurovision which started off ok...nice to see everyone etc but soon turned into disaster...everyone talking at the same time...people dropping in and out - was really hard work! We all bailed after an hour
Also WFH 8 to normally 5-6 so my evenings I want to hug the sofa, drink wine and watch crap TV really

Settle59 · 22/05/2020 09:03

YANBU. There are plenty of other things to do in lockdown. Good friends would understand that it's not your thing.

Dishwashersaurous · 22/05/2020 09:05

Why don’t you want to talk to your friends

wineandroses1 · 22/05/2020 09:07

I'm sat in front of a laptop all day long, but I still really like zoom meetups with friends. One is a group of 5 ladies, and it is great laugh, as we all have the same sense of humour. We zoom and drink wine twice a week for an hour. Also zoom with two other families once a week, so we can keep in touch with what's happening in their lives and so can the kids.

I think Zoom is great during lock down.

IdblowJonSnow · 22/05/2020 09:09

If you've not tried it yet give it a go?
It's not my thing either but theres one set of friends I'm a bit more comfortable with that I've really enjoyed. But either way it's fine. Each to their own!

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