Aibu to ask how your life changed between the age of 30 to 35??

[Gieennorg]

If it has!

Being nosey having just turned 30 and wondering where I will be in 5 years time! Hoping to have bought a house (waiting for the market to stabilise) be married with children (at least one!) Not asking for much am I haha!! 👀 anything could happen so i dont want to jinx it but looking forward to the future is really keeping me going right now!

How about you? 😀

Lived in four countries, did a master's, changed job, had a baby, married and swiftly divorced. It was a very intense few years! Things quietened down after that.

Mine didn’t change much at all really - I’d done marriage, house, babies in my 20s so early 30s have been all about trying to stay sane with 2 young dc. However, I would say that I grew a lot as a person - had to rediscover myself from just being ‘mummy’ etc and it has been a lot of fun.

An awful lot of my friends have gone from single / casual relationships at 30 to settled with a baby by 35 though so it’s definitely a natural time that those things seem to happen for many.

One of the things I’ve learnt is if you put timeframes on things it’s easy to end up disappointed - much better to enjoy the now.

Got sensible and started dating some who lived in same country (first time in 10 years!)
Married him
Changed from very lucrative meaningless career and went back to university
Had baby (whilst at uni)
Went through grueling year of cancer treatment (whilst at uni and with newborn)
Graduated and started new career in new field

It was an intense few years

Always wanted to be married with children by the time I was 30 but that didn't work out 😂
Got engaged at 30, split up 3 years later when he didn't actually want to get married, we'd been together 14 years.
Ventured into online dating and had a bit of fun 🤣
Met my husband age 35. Now happily married with 2 children.

Pretty shit really. Psychiatric issues that have been around all my life really came to a head in my late 20s - pulled the rug well & truly from under my feet!
I was unable to work so career disappeared, friends faded away as they went through life changes (career, relationships, children), we no longer had anything in common.
I've spent years in & out of psych wards - the idea of meeting someone, settling down, buying a place, marriage, kids went completely out the window.
Would love to go back to my early 20s. Life had the occasional psychiatric blip but I felt I was winning the war. That person died when I became ill. I'm 48 now & I've discovered there's only so much lemonade you can make.

Sounds very tough, Jocasta. Psych stuff can steal years from you.

Had a baby, divorced cheating husband, moved house, remarried, my dad died, got promoted. Quite a lot really!

My 30’s were my favourite decade.
Met DH at 30, married at 33, had DD1 at 35 and DD2 at 37.
Am 54 now and life is still good, but my 30’s were great.

Had twins
Bought a house

I'm 35 now.

The year I turned 30 I was married to a man, financially secure, starting to think about buying a house. I was slowly coming to terms with how awful my parents (especially my dad) had been during my childhood.

After that I left my husband and became estranged from my parents when my dad decided this was evidence I wasn't mentally stable. I moved to a new city, got a job, got very, very lonely. I ended up sharing a house with a friend who was very unhappy, but also a thoroughly disgusting person to live with.

Met my current partner, had a lovely few months of whirlwind romance. We had a baby together, both lost our jobs, moved 200 miles, our finances crashed, and we had a really, really, really rough couple of years. It's still up and down with her.

However, I now have my gorgeous DD who is the most perfect thing in the world. I've published a book and two articles. I'm still friends with some of the people who helped me leave my husband aged 30, but I lost friends I'd had since childhood who couldn't cope with the fact I came out as gay. Still renting, no prospect of buying a house any time soon. Still no permanent job or security; financially just edging toward tenuous stability. Still badly depressed.

I am in a much better place overall, though. Absolutely.

I met my DH and had 3 babies in 4 years I also graduated with a B.Sc and an M.Sc. The only bit I knew/thought would happen was the B.Sc.

At 30 I owned a lovely flat and had a boyfriend I'd been seeing a year. By 35 we had got married, been travelling, bought a house together and had two kids. It's doable!

I was married with 1 DC and been in our second house together for a couple of years by my 30th.
Had DC2 before my 31st and started concentrating on my career after mat leave. I've had 2 job changes and got up to the salary we needed to buy our (hopefully) forever home which should have completed next month but is on hold for now.

With the DCs being a bit older we've been able travel a bit further afield for holidays, and leave them GPs to get some trips in ourselves - something I'll miss in the next few years if this purchase goes through 😕

Bought a house.
Got engaged.
Got major depression.
Quit my job because of said depression.
Planned a wedding.
Got a new job.
Haven’t been able to start a new job because of Covid.
Cancelled wedding because of Covid.
Plans for children now cancelled because of Covid.
Depression very much resting it’s head again.
You can have all the plans in the world it doesn’t mean they’ll happen. Take each day at time.

Despite having 2 children by 30 I really don't think I properly grew up until I was 35.

When I turned 30 I was single, and I'll be turning 35 in November. I'm now married, 8 months pregnant, own a home and my own business.
Definitely didn't waste any time once I figured out what I wanted

Other than my MIL passing nothing major has happened but what I can say it that at 35 I'm definitely a lot more mature than I was at 30,I finally feel like a bonafide grown up if that makes sense.

Got promoted
Got divorced
Got happy
Got one parent less (death)
Got married
Got one parent-in-law less (death)
Got to be a mum
Got lucky.
From 30 to 35!

First baby at 30. Married at 32. Second baby at 33. Separated at 35.

I didn't realise it at the time but I was at the peak of my particular career at 30, as we got bought out a year later. I found it a time
In life where things shifted and became a bit more "real." I became a mum (unplanned) at 34 and then my focus shifted again but still with the whole grown up vibe of - security, owning a home, pension, plan for daughters education etc

I'm now 38 and have calmed down on trying to control and plan every little eventuality.

Pre 30 I partied, was care free, close to loads of my mates who's priorities were also festivals and parties, albeit while focusing on our careers...

Turning 30 can be a mind boggling and confusing experience so if your having "that" wobble it's very normal FYI.

I hope you achieve your dreams, aim high and dream big is ALWAYS my motto!

I bought my house, met my now fiance, got a dog, left a job I hated, got counselling, ditched bad friendships. Life is good right now

Got engaged
Moved cross-country
Got new career-style job
Got pregnant
Got married
Had Baby #1
Moved for better job
Got pregnant
Got laid off and new, better job with remote work
Had Baby #2
Bought a house
Got pregnant
Got new, better job

36 now and due with #3 soon.

Two days after my 30th birthday, I had a bit of a breakdown, sobbing and total hysterics, to my now-husband, after his best friend's wife had announced a pregnancy. I had years of infertility with my first husband, and I found myself telling my then-boyfriend that I felt like if I didn't have a child by 35 my life wasn't worth living. I told him I'd always wanted to be a mom more than I wanted any of the other good things that had actually happened to me, and it was killing me that it hadn't happened yet.

It was kind of a watershed moment in our relationship, and cemented for him that this wasn't some passing idea for me or something I was on the fence about. We were engaged 6 months later, and started our "12 months of trying" right away since I'd had PCOS-related infertility before, so we could get fertility treatments soon after the wedding. Instead I ended up a pregnant bride, and we've never had trouble conceiving.

35 looked so different than I thought it would at 30! By the end of 35, I made 4x the salary of my 30 year old self, had two beautiful children and a third on the way, and the boyfriend I thought was so amazing has become a devoted, attentive stay-at-home dad. What a ride it's been.

At 30 I was very career focussed. I spent the next few years having a lot of professional success, moved jobs and cities twice, ended up in my dream job.

Then at 34 I left that job to look after my mother whilst she was terminally ill. My outlook on life changed totally, realised I wanted a life centred round the people I love not the job I do.

At 35 I met my husband. Moved cities again and started a new life.

I moved back to my home country.

I gained a lot of confidence and see the same in many of my friends.