Step daughter in almost naked pictures

[FirstTimeMum54321]

My DSD has just celebrated her 15th birthday. Like a lot of girls her age, she could easily pass for 18. She is very good with makeup and looks beautiful. She has a public instagram account that anyone could see, and poses very 'sexy' pictures which leave very little to the imagination. I know I'll get hammered for this, but she is making herself look really cheap. There are pictures of her breasts with hearts over the nipples. Naked bum shots with just a tiny thong I'm not exaggerating. I would kill to look like her but the pictures make me cringe. I'm not her mum and I've spoken to her dad about it but he's not interested in doing anything about it. I have a terrible relationship with her mum so can't speak to her about it. I don't know if her mum knows about it as I don't think she uses instagram. I've tried reporting this to instagram but they don't give a flying fig.

I'm worried that some old paedo is looking at her pictures or worse still she'll be groomed.
Should I just stay out of it?

School safeguarding staff are working. Send it to the school and ask them to keep your name out of it.

Don't see anything wrong with the wording of the op either

Young girls of this age follow the herd mentality and at 15 what she is doing is against the law by uploading them,my GDs friend did this last year and she was referred to a safeguarding unit ran by NSPCC it took a while for them to instill into her how wrong she was acting,get her father to man up and confront her and also speak to her mother reguardless of your relationship with her.

Agree school safeguarding lead is the person to contact anyway.
Even more so if the CHILD can be identified as a pupil.

Ideally, the parents should be all over this issue & talking to the school for guidance & support. For now, that has stalled.

However, given the school uniform, even more you should contact the safeguarding lead as the girl may be following a trend or meme going round the school.

School is open for this. Just ask for safeguarding lead when you ring.

If you don't talk to her mum, you don't know if/how she's addressed it or not. Not much you can do there.

But I find it really shocking that her dad is aware and doesn't care. What an awful way to parent his daughter
Any 15 year old deserves better than a father with no regard for her safety. Is there no way that you can get through to him? He should be stepping up and dealing with his child himself. Not relying on other people to do it for him.

@spatchcock What exactly are you reporting?

Even though you don't have a good relationship with her mum, can't you send the IG link to her and say you haven't said anything and won't interfere but you thought she'd want to see.

Then, sadly, other than letting the school know and explaining to your partner to take his parenting more seriously, there's nothing else you can do.

Even though school is closed staff will still be taking calls and able to direct you to safeguarding who will still follow up and try to support albeit not face to face at present. We are.

Just seen your comment about pathetic parenting - I agree, but why do you want to be with a man who parents like this?

I work in a school and we've done safeguarding recently on this.

DO NOT SEND SCREENSHOTS of this girl. You could be prosecuted if you're sending images of a questionable nature (naked/part naked) to anyone. By all means screen shot for evidence, but don't send. If police get involved they will advise you from there.

If she looks 18 to anyone seeing the pictures, why do you accuse people who look at them of being a "paedo"? As far as they're concerned, she's an adult.

All Safeguarding staff in schools are still working, whether at home or at school (I know because I am one of those members of staff, legally some one has to be working at all times). If the school has a SHARPs system or something similar (check the website) you can report it anonymously, if not, check who the DSL is at school and email them immediately. Make sure you mention here are photos of her in her school uniform.

@shimy the level of detail, the weird comment about being envious of her body and the name change.

But I could be wrong - in which case apologies.

@AvoidingRealHumans You want the OP to copy pornographic images of a child and then to email them to other people?!

Pathetic parenting from both if you ask me

Yet you are the one calling her 'cheap' on the internet.

Has the dad actually seen the photos? Have you explained to him that it’s public and his mates from the pub/ work colleagues could see them? I find it really hard to believe a dad wouldn’t have issue with this.

Have you spoken to the step daughter yourself and expressed your concern? Do you have that type of relationship that you can do that?

Fgs don’t tell her she looks cheap though.

Would cloud my judgement of her df also...
Not an attractive quality - dc neglect - which it is..
Again imo.

It’s worth fighting with your husband over this.

First, tell your step daughter you love her, she’s beautiful and that her body should be treated with honor and respect. That posting these isn’t showing respect for herself.

Tell your DH that he has to take care of his daughter. Raise hell until it’s easier to do his job as a parent than to listen to you bitch at him. She’s crying out for attention because he is not doing a great job as a father.

Email her mother and tell her you wanted to make sure she is aware of the content of her instagram. Then back off.

Then report to the school for safeguarding if one or both don’t react within 48 hours.

I believe this is our job as step parents; we signed up for it when we married men that had children. I am so adamant about this because I dropped the b-ball on a few things when my SS was younger.

Well tbh Simon I didn't think of it like that, also if they are on Instagram I doubt they are pornographic but highly inappropriate due to the age of her. Sounds like her bits and bobs are covered but they are provocative pictures.
If worried about that then op could put an emoji over the image so the school can get the gist of the image otherwise what is she meant to report with no evidence of the inappropriate and worrying pictures?

Let's leave a child at risk of harm just so we don't get accused of something ridiculous like sharing child porn.
Seriously

Screenshot the images and the ones of her in uniform and email to the school with your concerns about safeguarding

Jesus Christ, DO NOT DO THIS. You could be done for making and distributing pornographic images of a child.

You can report to the school without sending images, obviously.

Both her parents should have a major issue with her doing this and stop her from putting these photos online. You can’t do much about her mum but why the fuck are you with a man who is letting his just turned 15 year old daughter doing this. What a vile man and absolutely useless father.

Not sure how you can judge the mum for her ‘pathetic parenting’ when you don’t know if she’s seen the pictures, don’t know what steps she’s taken or tried to, and are in a relationship with the other ‘pathetic parent’ who most certainly has seen them and just can’t be arsed to be the bad guy. Definitely jump on the mum though 🙄

Don't copy or forward photos. Motivation is nit a legal defence around distribution of illegal images - which these may be.
Call NSPCC, children and families social work, or school. Services are still operating.

Thymelord no one knows who the OP or her daughter is, you plonker. And we all know that cheap is pretty good shorthand for ‘taking your clothes off on the internet for likes’ (unless you’d prefer to use the word ‘empowered’ or something?). She’s 15 and needs telling.