Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Who should pay?!

288 replies

Boatymcboatofftheboat · 25/04/2020 21:17

The specifics of this are incredibly outing so changing a few of the details (hopefully it still makes sense! Please bear with me):

My friend has a boat she can no longer afford. I am interested in her boat, but not 100% sure I need one at this time. We had an agreement before lockdown that I would have 100% ownership of the boat for a trial period of 2 months (all of April and May). I would pay costs totalling 350£ a month for this period. In exchange I would have 100% use of the boat and my friend would not use it at all. Because of lockdown I am not able to use the boat, but I agreed to pay before this and a deal is a deal/I value my friendship so have paid for April and planned to pay for May. However my friend has mentioned several times that she has been using the boat during April.

DH thinks I would be crazy to pay for May as agreed since I have not used it and actually friend is using it which breaks our agreement/essentially means I am paying for her to use her own boat.

I am in two minds as I value her a friend and don’t want to be petty, and lockdown is not her fault obviously - but equally I’ve paid one month and I am rankled she has been using it.

YABU - pay for May as agreed
YANBU - you paid for one month already and that’s enough/don’t be a mug

OP posts:
Thread gallery
5
Original poster
Boatymcboatofftheboat · 25/04/2020 22:12

@Inthemuckheap

That about sums it up! Yes!

OP posts:
Original poster
Boatymcboatofftheboat · 25/04/2020 22:13

@Fruitsaladjelly

Times have changed fruit salad, it’s no longer a horse.

Is it even still a Panda?!

OP posts:
Original poster
Boatymcboatofftheboat · 25/04/2020 22:14

@donquixotedelamancha

I don’t want people to mistake me for Joe exotic, what with my mullet and all

OP posts:
Honeyroar · 25/04/2020 22:14

Fair enough. In that case, because of what the yard asked and because you’re in the vulnerable category I’d definitely say you’ll need to postpone the trial until the situation changes.

donquixotedelamancha · 25/04/2020 22:14

Is it even still a Panda?!

Oh yes. Buying a real tiger would be ridiculous.

bettybattenburg · 25/04/2020 22:15

OP, is you?

InThisMultiverse · 25/04/2020 22:15

Put the car on the boat and take it to the other side. Leave the car there and come back for the horse. Take the horse over then get in the car and run your friend over. Solved.

donquixotedelamancha · 25/04/2020 22:16

Put the car on the boat and take it to the other side. Leave the car there and come back for the horse. Take the horse over then get in the car and run your friend over. Solved.

What about the panda?

Flummingbird · 25/04/2020 22:16

Oh god this is the thread I needed today!!

@InThisMultiverse You forgot about the panda-tiger! Does it have to swim over itself???

Original poster
Boatymcboatofftheboat · 25/04/2020 22:17

Imagine if I hadn’t made the car typo and we Were all talking about a boat still.

Or would the boat story have been riddled with holes because I know nothing about boats and boat costs

OP posts:
CrotchetyQuaver · 25/04/2020 22:17

So what was the £350 that you paid for? Did that cover the horse's full livery for the month? It wouldn't in my area, but I know it would elsewhere in the U.K. which is why I ask.
It sounds to me like she agreed to fully loan the horse to you for a couple of months, on a LWVTB (loan with View to buy) basis then she's very cheekily taken advantage and gone up there to ride him/her even though she wasn't meant to be doing that and didn't discuss with you beforehand? By my reckoning, that means she voided the loan agreement you had. I'd be asking her for my £350 back and I certainly wouldn't be paying for May. Quite where you go from here is up to the two of you, I reckon she's intending on pulling out of the sale, but I wouldn't be confident you'll get your £350 back.

What she should have done was tell the yard owner of your arrangement and then you could have gone up to ride once they relaxed the rules. I suspect she's taking the mick.

donquixotedelamancha · 25/04/2020 22:17

You forgot about the panda-tiger! Does it have to swim over itself???

Nooo. The paint will come off.

Flummingbird · 25/04/2020 22:17

Definitely don't pay for a boat riddled with holes. That's just silly.

InThisMultiverse · 25/04/2020 22:17

I thought the car was a Panda. Back to the drawing board.

Original poster
Boatymcboatofftheboat · 25/04/2020 22:19

Definitely don't pay for a boat riddled with holes. That's just silly

What if they are speed holes?

Who should pay?!
OP posts:
TrainspottingWelsh · 25/04/2020 22:20

Just for future reference I knew it was a horse before I'd finished reading the op. I can see the logic in paying for a different month instead of May, but depending on how valuable it is, and how likely she is to get a quick sale, there is another side to it.

If you use the example of a car, nobody would expect to lease one for running costs only for two months whilst they decided if they wanted to buy it. Theoretically she could have sold it to you, or someone else, before lockdown if she hadn't agreed to a trial. And if you're in the vulnerable group then you would have had the costs the £350 represents, plus the cost of extra services for whatever she's been doing, and still not got any personal use.

Of course, if it isn't the type to sell easily then there's more grounds to delay the trial.

Flummingbird · 25/04/2020 22:20

Drug smuggling on the boat??? Jesus you're really getting borrowing a panda all wrong here...

Original poster
Boatymcboatofftheboat · 25/04/2020 22:20

Amazingly, 97% of people think IANBU, even though keeping pandas is against all sorts of laws

OP posts:
donquixotedelamancha · 25/04/2020 22:21

Or would the boat story have been riddled with holes because I know nothing about boats and boat costs

It was very obviously not a boat. I had assumed it was an ice cream van.

Original poster
Boatymcboatofftheboat · 25/04/2020 22:21

Of course, if it isn't the type to sell easily then there's more grounds to delay the trial

It won’t sell easily it’s incredibly green and arthritic

OP posts:
Eddielzzard · 25/04/2020 22:21

Well I don't think you should be paying for May certainly. And I think she's being a bit of a CF accept your payment for April, given you haven't managed to ride the mongoose and she has. I suspect she's a bit of a user, but a lot of fun so you want to keep the friendship going?

Original poster
Boatymcboatofftheboat · 25/04/2020 22:22

I had assumed it was an ice cream van

I’m scared because I don’t even know how seriously to take this comment

OP posts:
LochJessMonster · 25/04/2020 22:22

This thread is an absolute trainwreck but I enjoyed every minute of it.

InThisMultiverse your comment made me laugh.

Lemonblast · 25/04/2020 22:22

Are you sure it’s a panda?
It looks more like a racoon to me.

But I have had wine....

Original poster
Boatymcboatofftheboat · 25/04/2020 22:23

@Eddielzzard

She’s actually really, really lovely and sweet. Her husband is a bit controlling though, and I suspect some of this will be that she just doesn’t want to pay for May/financial break and doesn’t want to get into an argument about it.

I’m happy to let her have the money for April, I just think may is going too far. I dropped some heavy hints about it already but she did not pick them up. Now that I have some more opinions I think I will have to take the panda by the horns.

OP posts:
Swipe left for the next trending thread