To take kids to visit my mum on her birthday (from afar)

[Beingyellow]

Ok I will probably get flamed but I'll put it out there anyway. I am all for following rules but also think common sense needs to prevail sometimes. So here's my scenario....

I have been going shopping for my mum. She is on her own now, less than a year since my dad died. She's in her 60s and it makes sense for me to shop and drop stuff off for her rather than us both shopping seperately during this period. I usually just put it on her doorstep, ring the bell and walk to my car and we shout across to each other to say hello etc. Only been twice so far as I shop once a week.

It's her birthday next week, so I planned to do the same as above but take the family with me when I drop it off (along with her present). We would all stand way back and not go near her.

Is this really that bad? I would have to come back and pick up family but its on the way to my mums anyway. My kids are old enough not to run over and hug etc...they understand (7, 9 and 11)

Yes it’s that bad ffs how can people still not understand the rules. It’s not an essential journey.

I waked down to my mum's year with DS and we sat in the garden and she sat in the doorway for half and hour and we chatted then went home.

No contact and she never goes in the garden as she can't manage the steps
Up.

Don't this a couple of times now for our daily walk. It's good for all.

This said she only lives a ten minute walk away and we do use it for our daily outing on a weekday after I've finish wfh.

It's ready good for mum as she's on her own and feeling lonely now.

Go and shout happy birthday to your mum.

*yesterday

I think the kids could probably have a better conversation with their grandma on a video call rather than shouting across a road. It's classed as a non-essential journey and I can't see what either your mum or your kids would get out of it that they couldn't get from a video call or phone call.

Yes I’d do it

I’m sure most people will say no, but if you’re going anyway, I think it will be lovely for her and you’ve already said you’ll observe the 2m rule. If it’s just a quick hello, then hopefully you’ll avoid the wrath of the angry curtain twitchers who hate the idea of anyone having even 1 minute of happiness. X x

It's a journey you are doing anyway to drop off food?
Fine imo.

Be prepared you may get stopped and told off by police. Unfortunately this is non essential and should not happen. Why don't you video call instead or if she hasn't got access to this buy her something for her birthday. This is what we have done for grandparents.

We will phone her too. I will be going there anyway to drop off her shopping....the only difference would be taking them to give her a wee wave and smile from afar. Dropping off supplies to vulnerable is an essential journey I thought?

Can’t you walk to your mums? If not then don’t do it

If you’re all shouting ‘happy birthday’ from the road that’s fine.

I would do it if I were you.

The OP has said she’s dropping off shopping as she would normally, and including with that her mums present. She has also said that her house is on the way to her mums. So she is doing the essential journey that she would anyway.

FFS what bit of stay at home, do people not get. How many more times does the government need to say it??

Honestly it’s like dealing with a load of over grown toddlers...people not listening finding a way to bend the rules that little bit, the reason death rates are going up...nurses and children dying and for what the advice to still be ignored

At least on video call or even the good old telephone the children can speak to her properly rather than shouting

I wish people would actually read the OP properly

If was my dm’s birthday after Mother’s Day and I dropped off some essentials for her including some flowers as she has a heart problem. She was waving at us through the window and my dB grabbed everything as we left (he lives and cares for her).
We just Skype/FaceTime now.

Do your actions help protect the NHS or potentially create risk?

You dropping her shopping off at the door step and leaving is essential yes.

You putting your dc in the car and taking them to see her, is essential how?

She's dropping off shopping and saying happy birthday to her mum

fgs, it's fine. Absolutely fine.

I have 8 grandchildren and 1 great grandson I cant see any of them because I don't want any of us getting ill im in my 60s there is absolutely no reason to put your children into the car get them out to say happy birthday leave them at home and safe get them to ring her

You dropping shopping off for her might be deemed essential. Taking your children for a journey like this isn't.

It's fine ignore the people who are making up new rules. My in-laws have done a similar thing to us they dropped off some nappies whilst we were isolating then stood at the end of the drive to talk to us.

To be fair the OPs children are young enough that if she left them in the house on their own MNetters of, like, 2 months ago would have been pearl-clutching and on about calling SS to report her for endangering her children - who also should be walked across busy garage forecourts for the time it takes to pay for fuel and pick up a packet of wotsits.

It's an essential shopping trip and doorstep drop off. If the kids stay in the car (and for the shopping) what's going to happen that wouldn't be happening anyway. It's not like she's heading off to Brighton to picnic on the beach (and I bet some fuckers will be).

I'm likely to have to make a 3 hour round trip (essential journey) in 4 weeks time. If we're still in lockdown do I take my 9 and 11 year old or not? No their father can't watch them - I'll be dropping him off at a ship (he doesn't want to go by train as if one person takes it to work the whole crew will have a problem).

The journey is necessary as it's a food delivery. If the children get in the car parked on their driveway and don't get out at their gran's then they are not putting anyone at risk.

Waving from the car is ok, kids getting out is not.