Man with persistent cough shopping with partner - just why?!?

[Defenbaker]

I went shopping today, for essential items, to a large supermarket. There was a small queue, with a security guard letting people enter as others left, to ensure social distancing inside. All very calm and not many people inside, so that was good.

However, in the second aisle there was a man coughing. I thought, oh well, it's probably nothing, just an ordinary cough, don't panic. I avoided him anyway, just in case. However, he then kept on coughing, at regular intervals, all around the shop. He never once used a tissue, or even his hand or the crook of his arm to catch the cough, and the cough was just the sort of dry, persistent cough that medics have described as a symptom! Regardless of whether he had the Covid19 virus or not, he was certainly not being careful to keep his germs to himself. I wondered how many people he could be infecting.

Although I tried my best to avoid him, he then appeared quite near me, where I was using the self scan till. This conversation took place:

Me: "It might be a good idea if you wait outside while your partner does the shopping, as you have a cough."

(He looked stunned, as though the idea hadn't occurred to him.)
Him: "Oh, it's just a cough, I don't have a temperature!"

Me: "That's a symptom, you might have it, you don't know."
Him: "I've been to the doctor... I don't have it."

Me: "So, have you had the test then? Did you have a negative result?"
Him: "The doctor said I'm fine... " (He looked shifty, like he was tempted to lie but found it difficult while I fixed my gaze on him.)
Me: "Even if you haven't got it, people are bound to be anxious when you're coughing all over the store. It really would be best if you wait outside."
Him: "Mmm... maybe... "

All the time his partner said nothing. I got the impression she was a bit embarassed to be with him, as she knew how others would view his germ ridden presence.

He then sloped off. AIBU to think that he had no reason to accompany another (able bodied) adult around the shop, and should have known better than to behave so thoughtlessly during this health crisis?

The speed at which it happened (neighbours berating neighbours who go out twice a day/walk their dog once too often/buy Easter Eggs/don't clap) has been terrifying.

ItalianGreyhound posted:

"I think OP that if this were to happen again it would be good to report it to a staff member and ask them to speak to the person. Perhaps they could be provided with a complimentary pack of tissues by the store.

It's not about demonizing people, it's about encouraging everyone to look out for each other."

Many people probably won't believe this, but I did speak to the shop assistant about it, while I was self scanning at the till. She agreed it was worrying, but said there's nothing they can do. She also said "You wouldn't believe some of the awful behaviour that I've seen here since all this began... it's really changed my view of people!" I said it must be awful for her, being on the front line. (Not in the same extreme way as nurses, obviously, but exposed to all sorts.) I felt really sorry for her and all the other staff. Then he appeared, quite close to me, the timing was such that I felt I ought to say something, knowing that no one else would.

I realise I was unreasonable in some of what I said to him, but I don't regret speaking to him, especially if it gives him pause for thought next time he's out and about.

Maybe he was being honest when he said the doctor told him 'it's fine, it's just a cough', but maybe the doctor added something about self isolating, just in case, and the man lef that bit out. I'm pretty good at reading people, and he just looked like he was lying, from the get go, but I'll never know.

Ironically, the reason I suggested him waiting outside was partly because it seemed too personal to point out that he hadn't made any effort to use a tissue etc... I would feel awkward picking someone up on their poor hygiene, like a mother telling off a child. So, instead I ended up grilling him out what his doctor had said, which I was wrong to do, but honestly if you'd seen him, read his body language, I think most people would think he was lying.

Yourt digging yourself a bigger hole all the time OP. Good art reading people

OP should change her name to " Walter Mitty"

If you know- you know 😜

If someone confronted me in a supermarket i think i'd also look shifty... My mind would be wondering what this person was on and if I could take them in a fight.

This nasty habit of putting individual rights above the group is what's making Britain S%&@! We did it with criminals which ruined our law & order, and we're doing now.

The man coughs without covering his mouth IN A PANDEMIC that's killing thousands and the woman who called him out is vilified??! WTH!!

Only mad people should be making excuses for him on here. These monsters want the majority conflicted on right from wrong, then we give them our power. We're failing governmentally AND failing morally.

Fine them OR lock 'em up... No one.. NO ONE's right to cough without a covering their mouth is greater NOW then the rights of thousands to not get sick and die.

We either stand together on these rules or divided THOUSANDS more will die unnecessarily because we will not stop the spread. ITS NOT THAT COMPLICATED!

"You wouldn't believe some of the awful behaviour that I've seen here since all this began... it's really changed my view of people!"

Hmm, I wonder which people she was referring to here. Perhaps she was including the officious self-appointed cough police. This crisis has certainly opened my eyes to some deeply unpleasant behaviour on the part of busybodies who should mind their own business.

Wow.

The man coughs without covering his mouth IN A PANDEMIC that's killing thousands and the woman who called him out is vilified??! WTH!!

Did you miss the part where she 'called him out' for being in the supermarket when he had a cough, which may be CV? OP didn't 'call him out' for not covering his mouth.

Only mad people should be making excuses for him on here.

Not mad, not mad at all. Quite capable of making sensible decisions and looking clearly at the situation.

These monsters want the majority conflicted on right from wrong, then we give them our power. We're failing governmentally AND failing morally.

Eh? Who's a monster now?

Fine them OR lock 'em up... No one.. NO ONE's right to cough without a covering their mouth is greater NOW then the rights of thousands to not get sick and die.

The monsters? The people with a cough? Or just the ones who didn't use a tissue? Who are we locking up? And note to the point, where?

We either stand together on these rules or divided THOUSANDS more will die unnecessarily because we will not stop the spread.

What rules? The government guidelines? Well nobody knows these were broken.

ITS NOT THAT COMPLICATED!

Why are you shouting?

1000atfc5423 there, neatly demonstrating how fascism started.

and guess what panic buying still going on, need a new laptop so went on Curry's site tried to ring sales, message says all chest freezers are out of stock they have orders can't fill and cannot get enough from suppliers. only one reason for it! they are now buying up all the frozen foods. I put my little online order in and just pray that i get it all or I have to stretch meals over a couple of days. no local shops not that I am meant to go out, but can get fresh fruit and veg from my little plant shop on corner so not ordered that will buy from him as he has taken the time and effort to help the neighbourhood.

Oh to be like Finland, and not be working with a model that is 100 years out of date.

We should be demanding the government implements testing of everyone this is after all the 21st century, not that you'd know it from the witch hunting that is going on all over the place might as well be back in Salem!!!!

Finland tested the population, isolated correctly those positive and the rest of society went about their business normally.

I actually wonder of the ones that are doing the witch hunting are they all in their prime with no medical conditions, so even if they caught the virus, the chance of much more that a few days of not very nice suffering is about all they'd suffer. Well up until yesterday I had to go out and do my shopping and I am meant to be self shielding but there is no one to go get my food or my meds, fortunately now I can order online. but i am sticking up for the guy who yes lack some basic hygiene rules but as many said we no nothing about him. and if someone had fixed me with their gaze i'd probable be a bit reticent and reserved.

Its facism for someone to get upset at a man coughing without covering his face during a pandemic which has killed hundreds of thousands of people??? What kind of warped reasoning is this?

It doesn't matter if he's coughing up a chicken bone he should have his mouth covered. The defenders of this man's behaviour are the facists because he's acting out exactly what you would like to do.

You lets hope you get what you wish for and he coughs on your loved ones .. assuming you have any.

RTFT properly no one has defended him coughing without covering his mouth

You lets hope you get what you wish for and he coughs on your loved ones .. assuming you have any.

That is a disgusting thing to say to those who are just trying to explain why it isn't acceptable to quiz people on their person business in public. You should be truly ashamed.

but no one will ever know why he was coughing and lets get is right Covid 19 does not kill it is the underlying health issue that do that Covid is the catalyst and that is what all the papers etc report underlying health issues that is why those of us at most risk have to shield.

so now @1000atfc5423 go back and read RTFT properly then apologise to everyone

I am in permanent meds, one of which gives me an irritating regular cough.
I've had some filthy looks since CV started and now wait in the car while my missus does the shopping.

maybe @1000atfc5423 your tag should be @JohnAlden

@Childrenofthestones poor you I know you are not the only one but then you are probably like majority and not the exception and cover you mouth, like many on here who have nagging coughs that have lasted years. I hope you stay well and take no notice of them it is because of the all witch hunters and little fascists they have all become totally paranoid.

Perhaps if you're going to delight in being so vicious 1000atfc5423, you should read the thread first.

Thanks @SquashedSpring nice to get some backup

I wonder how some of these people would feel is someone came into their homes and started to quiz their partner or their children boot wold definitely be on the other foot then.

I suffer from asthma which makes me cough, also suffer from acid reflux. again which makes me cough.

See all you witch hunters and little Hitlers out there, there are lots of people who cannot help but cough. And your prejudices and paranoia are making their lives a misery. I hope you stay well @Notsosimple