Where is the worse place you have farted ?

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Mine has to be at work and in front of a customer. I tried to hold it in but it just popped out and was very loud. Luckily the customer burst out laughing and we both ended up with tears in eyes as was quite funny. I apologised and she said was no problem
Where is the worst place you have farted in ?

Hampton court palace and the witches museum in Boscastle - luckily we were the only tourists in both rooms at the time

Love these 😂😂

When I was about 10/11 I did a club in a large church hall, while stretching I did the loudest fart you gave ever heard... it echoed off the walls, ceiling and floor, one of those that feels like it will never end. Everyone heard and knew it was me.
I never went back.

Another time I was having a smoke break at work chatting to a colleague and some people from another company in our building were there too, I coughed and a super loud fart came out. I tried to style it out by just carrying on but my colleague nearly choked laughing.

Third place goes to during a PT session in a quiet gym with a hunky trainer.

During a yoga class - namaste

We were out with two friends and I drop a silent but violent fart. It was so gross that I could practically taste it. The other couple were covering their noses and commenting whilst I also covered my nose and blamed DH 😂

Oh and sorry to lower the tone but DH has still never forgiven me for farting in his face when he was going down on me 😬

Mid run once, I started getting horrendous gas pains, literally bubbling through my insides. Incredibly painful.

I had to stop and once I let it go, it didn't stop. The longest fart in my life, even had to bend over with the force of it.

Afterwards following the sigh of relief, I had that feeling that someone was watching me.....and stood about 6 ft away was a man putting his bins out at the end of his driveway.

There are 2 toilets in the bathroom in work and every time I go in I check if the other one is free. If it is I can then shit and fart away to my hearts content. I went in one day and the second one was free so off I started clearing my insides except it wasn't free. They hadn't locked the bloody door properly

In my office. I can be my myself all fucking day and the second I let one rip, suddenly someone needs me ,🙄

I have since read that you need to fart 665 times to kill someone

Lol, where on earth did you hear that FraughtwithGin I can just imagine some scientists in a lab.... Still, good to know!

Omg @mamansnet my DH is the same! Says B&Q just makes him fart!!! It’s soooo embarrassing. Wtaf is wrong with these men

Harrods

These are hilarious 😆

I once bent over to kiss a new boyfriend goodbye and farted by accident. His face was .

I don't think we saw much of each other after that 😷🙈

Not me but when I got married myself, my late dad and two bridesmaids were waiting outside the ceremony room for our big "entrance"...my dad always the joker let off the biggest fart...

My best mate (chief bridesmaid) was dying laughing, as was I ,tears and everything and it was just at the point where we had to walk into a silent room to walk down the aisle. My sides were killing. I have no idea how I got down that aisle 🤣🤣🤣

There have been a few... once at work sat next to one colleague (I’m talking a meter away at most), it was only us... nobody else around and I had a bit of a painful tummy and a fart popped out. I thought how lucky I was as it was silent so he’d never know and then the smell just hit me, like a freight train. Probably the worst smelling fart I have EVER done. Neither of us said a word but I was dying inside 🤣
Another time when I was younger but embarrassingly in my 20’s (and this is gross so I apologise!) me and my brother used to wind each other up in a jokey way allot and we used to do a thing called “cupcake” (it’s grim ) where we’d fart into our hand and catch it really quick, release it in the others face and shout “cupcake” 😂 but as I went to fart in my hand some diarrhoea came out so I essentially shat in my own hand 🤣

After the birth of my first baby, I had to have a spinal block to have stitches 'down under.'

After being wheeled back onto the ward and hubby had gone home to get changed, I COULD NOT CONTROL MY GAS.

The farts just kept rolling out 🙈🙈

And there is the shameful bit...I BLAMED MY HOUR OLD BABY 🤣🤣🤣

I kept saying "oh dear, you are a windy baby, aren't you!!"
🙈🙈🙈

OMG I am doing full on Muttley wheezing laugh with a sort of high pitched involuntary hnggggg continuous noise as I try and breathe reading these!

Farting is always funny and I don't understand those pious MNers who get all (pardon the pun) sniffy about it on other threads. This one is fantastic!

I used to sleep-fart on my ex's leg when he was lovingly cuddled behind me.

He said the very worst part was the vibrations he could feel on his thigh from it

When you have a C Section they swab your back with iodine before they inject you for the spinal block. I was sitting in a pool of iodine that had collected under my bottom when I farted. It was pretty powerful and it blew bubbles in the iodine. I didn't dare laugh in case I moved and they paralysed me with the needle. I was so busy thinking about all of this I didn't even feel it!! 😲😂

Once when I was about 19, finally met a guy I'd really fancied for ages, we ended up play fighting, I had his head in a leg lock and he tickled me to get out. I laughed and farted while his face was still pressed up against my arse, what made it worse is it made me laugh more so I farted more.. just kept letting out rhythmic pumps on the poor guys head.

The second time was years later with a different guy, very new relationship, falling asleep with him with my bare bum against his wall. My relaxed bum cheeks parted with a massive fart as I was drifting off, it bounced off the wall and ricocheted through the room. It woke me up fully so I paused in silence to see if it had woken him up, a few seconds later he said "....nice". He could have had the decency to pretend he was still asleep! I actually cried!

Whilst invigilating an English GCSE exam. In front of 140 boys.

@Purpleorangegerberas, that's awful!

So awful I nearly pmsl.

Torn between two..

In a very small, very hot, very airless tropical fish shop... I did a silent but incredibly deadly job that hung around for a long time according to my friend who works there. The other girl who works there was convinced something terrible had happened in one of the marine tanks (they can produce vile toxic gases!) but when I confessed it was me, my friend thought it was hilarious!

As a teenager, I was once the 'casualty' for a St John Ambulance cadet competition... I had to lie on teh floor covered in fake blood and someone would come and put me in the recovery position..

I relaxed rather too much and when i was rolled into position... my guts let rip with the LOUDEST, SQUEAKIEST fart, it went on for ages... I could not clench, the more I clenched, the squeakier it went...

There were five St John branches there with teams of 4 people each plus parents, friends etc.... it was mortifying!

In Aldi.I was in the queue with my dp,and i thought there was no one behind me.I let rip,it was silent [thankfully]but it wasnt odorless.My dp made a face ,i laughed and then turned around.To see a man stood behind me going 40 shades of green.I ran,but it was funny.

Pilates

In a hoist on a manual handling course, in front of about 6 other HCPs. We were all crying laughing.