To suggest I'd rather he didn't shower

[ladybirdees]

And blow dry his hair at 4.30am pre leaving for his flight. This is my DH leaving for a ski trip in the morning and he feels he cannot possibly get up and just sneak out whereas I know that him doing his full morning routine at that time will wake the baby and I could really do without that given i'm going to be here managing 3 children on my own for the next 4 days. I feel it's a small give on his part for family harmony whereas he cannot fathom the idea of leaving without a shower and has suggested the only alternative is him leaving tonight and staying in a hotel so he can have the shower without disturbing anyone. Who is being unreasonable?

Eww, to not showering but the blow dry happens the night befor.

He is. FGS, what a diva.

Can he not just shower last thing before going to bed ?

He is!! We’re not in the height of summer. He won’t wake up a sweating mess. He can easily shower the night before and sneak out quietly in the morning x

Why is it "eww"? @AgentJohnson ?
He can shower the night before and then shower again once he gets there. He's being selfish and inconsiderate.

Neither of you are being unreasonable.

I understand you do nt want the baby to be woken up and understand why he wants a shower before a long flight.

An obvious compromise is for him to have a shower at the airport.

Couldn’t he just have a thorough shower before bed ?

Why doesn't he shower tonight and then have a shower when he gets to his hotel? I always want a shower after a flight.

Wouldn’t a shower but no hair drying be a compromise?

Wouldn’t a shower but no hair drying be a compromise?

Sounds reasonable.

He is being unreasonable. Tell him that if he wakes the baby he can’t leave the house till he gets the baby back to sleep!!

"darling, I know you might want a shower before you head to the airport on xx morning. Do you think you could manage without the blow-dry so the baby doesn't wake up?"
Is that unreasonable?

before a long flight

? Unless he is heading for the US/Canada the flight is only going to be a couple of hours, surely

YADNBU. Of course he'd like a shower, but you need the sleep. Has he not heard of using a flannel on his sweaty bits? What a princess he is.

Tell him to have one tonight. He’ll be plenty clean enough for his day ahead tomorrow.

I've suggested he shower tonight and then once he gets to the hotel but it's a no go. He wants to go straight out and ski. I just feel it's a bit inconsiderate of him. I know I wouldn't do that the other way around and I'm a bit shocked at the suggestion of booking a hotel as the answer as it's clearly only been suggested to make me feel like I'm totally unreasonable.

No to the shower and blow dry. Point out that 4:30am is still technically the middle of the night, he hasn't had a full nights sleep, only a nap. Would he shower after a daytime nap, no. So why would he shower after a nighttime one

I would expect him to ninja out of bed, actually no, I'd expect him to sleep downstairs and disappear without you even knowing he's gone. He should return with four family sized bars of duty free milka too, one for every day of abandonment and a giant tobelerone just for the inconvenience you've had having to start this thread.

Hibu unless he's flying to Canada or something

Haunted you have the perfect solution there!!

I'd LTB for blowdrying his hair, wtf? Am I the only one who thinks this is prize knob territory?
And that's before the showering at 4am nonsense.
I regularly rise at that hour, hair night before, 5 second special that morning, no fan on, literally noone wakes.

He's an unreasonable selfish twat.

He could shower quietly and not use the hairdryer for fucks sake.

I'm sure if it was the other way round, he would be screaming blue murder about being left with a woken baby at that hour.

He's going to France so max 2h flight! Thank you all for making me feel less like a battle axe.

Blowdrying his hair?! Seriously? YANBU just for that.

Tell him as a compromise he can have his shower and blowdry his hair at 2.30. Then he'll have time to get the baby back to sleep before he leaves the house.

He is being selfish. Hide the hairdryer, OP.