To think consistent lateness is pretty rude ?

[Username109876]

Every time I arrange to meet with friends, "sorry might be a bit late" virtually every time. Ok it's not hours, but at least 10-20 minutes.
I have only been late for work once in several years because my alarm didn't go off, otherwise I am always on time.

Same with meeting friends, if we arrange a time, I get there for that time.

It's just very annoying and it feels like they don't respect your time. At work my employers know I am reliable, but with friends it feels like they just take it for granted.

Anyone else feel this way ? I know sometimes things can come up, but when it's virtually majority of the time that's different.

Also none of them have kids so that makes it even worse.

Have you ever mentioned you have an issue with this?

I am late more often than I am on time, and rarely early. It doesn't matter what actions I take to get to a place on time. I can set alarms to leave, build in extra travelling time and permanently have clocks which are 5-10 minutes fast so I leave the house at the time I designated. I have a diary, wall calendar and use the calendars on my phone. I still end up running late.

It's not that I value my time more than yours, I just end up running late whatever happens. Luckily my friends 'know what thesword is like' and tease me about it. Especially on the super rare occasion I get somewhere before they do.

Speak to your friends. They might not be aware how annoying you are finding it. You might be one of those people who is always early, so are always waiting around longer. Your clock might be faster than theirs and they genuinely don't know you think they are late.

Yes it’s rude.

arriving on time if on foot is a simple calculation. If using other modes of transport it is courteous to build in extra time for delays. I bet you would if it made a difference to you.

consistently late is just 'I am more important so you can wait around'. Such people should be dumped.

@theswordthatdangles ....genuine question, if you had to catch a train to get you to say Gatwick airport and had to be on the one at 8am (and the next train was at 11am and would mean you’d miss your flight for a once in a life time holiday), would you be late for that train?

I'm exactly the sam as you @theswordthatdangles I genuinely don't know how time gets away from me.

Yes I find it very rude, if you’re consistently late then you’re suggesting your time is more valuable than other people’s because it doesn’t matter that they’re kept waiting for you.

Curious about people who are late frequently, are you late to every work every day? Do your bosses mind?

Yeah it’s rude.

@maddiemookins16mum for that situation I would plan on being at the station at 7am. But for everyday normal life planning to get places an hour early isn't practical and not helpful. I have little tricks to help me be more on time.. the clock in my car is about 8 minutes fast so I'm my head I use that as they real time' .

I read (on a similar MN thread actually) that there is a medical thing where some people just cannot accurately judge time, and are therefore often late. As I read it it was like reading about myself! I'll try and find it...

Yes it’s rude. Time doesn’t “just get away from you”, every other person figured out how to be there on time and made the necessary effort to make that happen. You don’t have a personal dimension where time travels differently and is completely non-linear and unpredictable. You’re either to lazy to bother working out how to make it work, or (unconsciously or not) too arrogant about your own time’s value over those who have to wait for you.

Ah, that feels better. Can you tell i’ve had several “friends” who were “just always late”? I don’t bother being friends with them anymore, as they clearly couldn’t be bothered to value my time as highly as their own.

I find it frustrating..but i know friends i have that are consistently late aren't doing it on purpose..its just the way they are built. Im built to always be early, i can't help it. I sometimes try to be "on time"... or even a bit late lol but i just can't do it. frustrate myself sometimes haha

If they’re constantly late, can’t you show up later to? I would. But yes it’s very rude, once or twice is understandable but every time is ridiculous.

I am late on a regular basis (5-10 mins) and I agree it's very rude. It's certainly something I'm trying to work on, all comes down to organisation really doesn't it?

Also, being late for a friend is different to being late for an appointment imo. I'm regularly late for friends etc but usually early for interviews/appointments

It is rude though and if anyone said to me that they had an issue with me being late I would absolutely try my best to make sure I'm not. I guess as it's usually with friends/family I don't se it as incredibly important.

I used to be late everywhere. I have made a mammoth effort to turn that around so that I am always slightly early. My kitchen clock is set 20 minutes early and I use it as the time to set off. I think my friends appreciate the new me much more than the old one.

My best friend is like this and it drives me bonkers. I’ll literally be on the way to meet her with the kids and she will message

‘Were ruining a big late. Kids wanted a lazy morning so we’re just getting dressed! Sorry hun you know what we’re like!’

Honestly if she didn’t know so much shit about me I’d ghost her!

I just end up running late whatever happens

It's still your choice to be late though, and rude.

As PPs have said, I bet you're never late for a plane.

I find it rude: it’s almost like saying my time is more valuable than yours. I don’t generally mind if people are coming to my house but when you’re waiting on people I find it very frustrating

I absolutely detest lateness. I always let them know they've pissed me off 😂

I’m always late. Not hours but a bit. All my friends are the same! When you have small children life just sometimes gets the better of you! If I am on time and friends are late I just get on with it until they arrive. Life’s too short!

If time gets away from you. Or oh you know what I’m like. Then start earlier it’s so rude.
We had it at work once. Consistently late person ‘had no concept of time ‘ l asked if that’s the case how come they’re never early?
Rude

I’m a consistently late person. I have several health issues that cause me chronic fatigue and often find it a huge effort just to get out of bed. I honestly don’t care if people are late and keep me waiting, it really doesn’t irritate me, I just... wait? I don’t really understand why it causes such anger if I’m honest. It doesn’t mean they think their time is more important, it just means they’re running late! People don’t do it on purpose because they enjoy keeping people waiting. And in answer to the previous question yes I am late for work every day and no my boss doesn’t mind. As long as the work’s getting done for when it needs to be I don’t think it should matter what time people turn up but I realise certain jobs can’t operate like this. I would never choose a job in which punctuality was paramount because I know I’d be unable to do it

@dodgeballchamp just because apparently your boss doesn't mind doesn't mean your colleagues don't.

It’s rude. Dh is like this. Always late. It’s as if his time is more valuable than anyone else’s.

It was interesting though when I was on mat leave it was still my fault when he was late if I dropped him into work (despite me getting myself a toddler and a baby ready and only having to go to nursery and back...)