What do the cloth addicts/babywearers/BLWers etc do when their kids get older???

[BabyofMine]

Having a small child I’m fascinated by how obsessed certain parents (ok, honestly it’s mostly mothers) get with certain aspects of parenting. To a crazy amazing degree. So far I’ve noticed the complete fanaticism with:

Cloth nappies
Baby wearing
Breastfeeding
Baby led weaning
Wooden/open ended toys
Certain brands of children’s clothes (Scandinavia/ethical brands)
Prams (having so many and getting new ones all the time)
Car seat safety (rear facing, some people I know seem to know every seat on the market!)

I can’t believe how obsessed some are with the above! Just to clarify I have an interest in most of the above and think there’s nothing wrong with any of the above! I just wonder, if you have older children, do you know anyone who was fanatical with any of the above (or were you yourself)? And if so what do they/you DO with themselves now those things aren’t important?! It just seems an all encompassing part of some of my friends/acquaintances lives I can’t imagine what they will do when our children get older!!

Especially wonder about the “cloth bumming” mums when their children toilet train!!!

They have more kids
Homeschool

Obsses over reading levels/school dinners/what the teacher does wrong with reference to their little snowflake

People will always find new obsessions though. It probably just shifts on to things like extra-curricular stuff for kids or hobbies for themselves. A few couples I know have become running fanatics since their kids got older and their FB is full of personal bests and all that stuff nowadays.

I do a lot of stuff on that list, but I can't say any of it consumes much mental energy or thought time.

Balance bikes vs stabilisers. Erf types like a good balance bike obsession. I include myself in that

Yes I was like that. I have moved on to pets!

Went back to work full time and got too busy to obsess about anything 🤷🏽‍♀️

I’ll over look the massive generalisations there.

However one mother I know who very hands on with her child and into many of the things you mention chose to homeschool.

This is in an area where homeschooling is almost unheard of (school provision is excellent and there’s no culture of homeschooling at all).

I hate that expression baby wearing

You're carrying your baby in a sling, not wearing it.

Minimalism, veganism and homeschooling. Lots of crossover between these interests anyway!

Out of your list

Cloth nappies - I didn’t do
Baby wearing - sometimes
Breastfeeding- yes for both up to 1 year old
Baby led weaning - yes for both
Wooden/open ended toys - yes I had a lot of wooden toys
Certain brands of children’s clothes (Scandinavia/ethical brands)- yes I used a lot of these brands ... frugi etc
Prams (having so many and getting new ones all the time) - I had 3 in total
Car seat safety (rear facing, some people I know seem to know every seat on the market- I rear faced mine until they were 4 - but I bought seats that catered for a good few stages

What do I do now? I work and have fairly normal children... I don’t really understand the question though tbh

Going back to work fixes most of these obsessions promptly....

I'm probably the opposite of what you describe but I guess they focus their drive elsewhere.

Yes balance bikes and micro scooters
Reading levels
Who gets the lead role in the school play
Smiling smugly while their children run amock
How much their children love houmous/ olives

Yes next stage is
Playdates
Party invites
School gate woes
School run dress (I miss the old school run dress threads!)
Cramming as many structured activities into spare time as possible
Posting in gifted and talented topic

I’m a mum of over 25 years. I don’t think it’s any different. Parents always fuss over the best pram, clothes, dietary fads, toys etc...
Having a baby exposes parents to a multi million pound market where the biggest players shout loudest but in this case, new parents are obviously more anxious as they generally want ‘the best’ for their baby.
I don’t think it will ever change.

Just to clarify I don’t just mean people who “do” these things. I do most of them. What I mean is for example I have a mum friend who baby wears, she talks about it constantly, has a massive collection of wraps carriers etc, goes to event meet-up things with others from a sling library thing, follows favourite brands and gets v excited by new prints and most of her disposable income goes on slings/wraps etc. I just can’t imagine what she will spend her time thinking about when her child is too old to carry. I’m not talking about someone who has a baby carrier or two.
Ps my friend is lovey and I’m not criticising her really though it probably sounds like it. She’s lovely. Just really, really into baby wearing.

I did most of the above with my DC. I don’t think I was obsessed with any aspect of it though, I just did it because it worked well for me. I don’t obsess over anything now really either, I mean I’m interested in their academic abilities and in them generally as people but I’m nowhere near obsessed.

Probably the same as people who get fanatical about other things.

I'm interested in all those things as having a baby and being on maternity leave is currently my job so want to do it as well as I can. Is that so weird?

I think most parents obsess in one way or another whatever their parenting style. Yes you get fanatics with stuff you have listed but I've found it works the other way too: anti breastfeeding, anti Co-sleeping, pro leaving baby to cry otherwise they will be clinging to you in their 40's etc etc

Get a life probably.
I look back at my evangelical breastfeeding, attachment parenting, weaning rules and I CRINGE.
I do think it was because I was at home for 3 years with DD.

@BabyofMine from my experience it's people who are intelligent and used to having full time jobs and doing things to the best of their abilities and these are currently seen as some.of the best ways. Otherwise what else do you do on mat leave I guess.

What do mothers do once their children grow up and they can no longer criticize other mothers for the choices they make, or belittle them for caring to a different degree than they themselves do? Hmm, OP? What are you going to do then?

@BabyofMine but you ARE criticising...you say you’re not but REALLY you are!!! It’s ok though...we’re all human, we all do it in some way or another!

Based on an VERY small sample admittedly:

Homeschool, or
run the school PTA
Become an NCT advisor
Set up as a ‘baby wearing consultant’

(No offence to anyone that does those things, especially the school PTA as I think you’re all marvellous, but just an observation about some characters I have known)

I was low-level pram obsessed and had about 8 over two children. Now I just miss my pram. I haven't developed any new interests though, I just liked prams.