aibu about your 40's

[notespeciallyno]

Aibu to wonder what your 40's were like or are like?

Wish I was in my 40s again! Just had 56th bday and had to fill in an online form - age group: are you 46 to 55, 56 - 65 etc. Am suddenly in the latter - aaargh!!!!!!

You have to take it all on the chin. DH was recently 50 (toyboy, yay) and his friends pointed out that the local pub does half price meals for over 50s on a Wednesday lunchtime. So there are some plus points (shame he's at work....).

And the parish magazine advertises a social club called 'Autumn Leaves' - yes, it's for over 50's.....

So make the most of your 40s, all of you. It's all downhill from then on...…..

@TatianaLarina
40s are great. You stop giving a shit what anyone thinks and your kids are old enough not to eat snails and electrocute themselves.

Exactly.

My eyesight is getting terrible though, definitely need reading glasses; also annoyed with my greying temples and inability to have more than two glasses of wine without feeling hungover the next day...although I suppose that's good health-wise as it limits alcohol intake!

Social life is great, much better than my 30's with young children. Career meh, but I have ideas to improve it. Concern about elderly parents are my main worry.

I feel so behind the times, irrelevant and invisible. I'm disabled and my health is deteriorating. But...
I married my wonderful husband at 40 and I feel I'm the luckiest woman in the world!
I'd say my 40s have been a very mixed bag.

Feels a hell of a lot older than my 30’s (becoming a grandmother didn’t help) but in many ways I’m more relaxed about things that would have freaked me out before

I turn 41 this summer. Had a complete melt down last summer turning 40 and just kind of switched off to life until a random moment between Christmas and New Year when suddenly just woke up. I've lost about 2 stone in weight, got fitter, am in the process of changing my job role at work. DD is off and about at 16 and doing her own thing.
I've discovered that I want and enjoy a social life again, and developed a huge and inappropriate crush on someone that I didn't even notice for the first 3 months we worked together. Nothing to happen there but I'm enjoying the flutters and feelings, haven't had them for a long time, enjoying the excitement of new career challenges and personal ones, and I love feeling thinner and attractive again. My confidence has gone through the roof.
I really was a miserable, permanently tired and anti social person through my 30's, I'm complaining different now, long may it last!

Split from 22 yr relationship at 40. Dc started leaving home for uni - I had the best time. So much fun and as previews posters said, didn’t give a fuck about things I didn’t have to gives a fuck for at all. Travelled solo around the world and had various gorgeous and intelligent lovers without too much commitment which suited me then. Built up my career. Married again in early 50s so more settled but have great 40s memories.

A bit fat throughout!

about to turn 46 and i would say a mixed bag. Had DC3 at 43 nearly 44 so still very much in the daily grind of young kids so in that respect doesn't feel much different from 30s and I feel more the same age as people in their 30s with young kids than people my age with older teenagers IYSWIM. Career going really well.

Less anxious about silly stuff, but I would say slightly more depressed than in my 20s and 30s. Definitley feel as though I look older, more middle aged, fatter etc. Can still just about scrub up to look nice but rarely get a second glance walking down the street etc. Met a gorgeous younger man recently through work and could tell he was looking at me a bit like his mum which was depressing!

But overall I would say life is good- still interesting, less anxiety, still feel relatively young and still in the game. This thread is a good reminder to remember that.

41 here, and I don't feel any different physically to how I did in my 30s... or 20s really, except that I've had to knock drinking on the head because it no longer agrees with me.

I’m 46 & best decade yet. I’ve got divorced, made a big group of new friends, run a half marathon, taken up yoga in earnest & learned to crochet.

44 last month. Fitter and more energy than I had at 34. More confident, more money. Yes also more wrinkles and grey hair but so what ? Feel like I'm on the home straight with child rearing (DCs 13&15). Yes to getting a social life back.

Great so far. I'm coming into my own.

And I certainly won't be judging my wellbeing in any given decade on how I bloody look.

Worst decade so far. My 30s were epic. I feel like I’m done now.

I'm 45. At first I didn't notice any difference, felt like my 40s were great! The last couple of years though I can feel things changing (I assume perimenopause). My periods are going haywire, I feel tired and suffer from terrible anxiety. There are added life pressures like having aging parents in poor health. On the plus side I'm managing my weight really well (I do 16/8 which I find effortlessly easy).

Not great. Anxiety through the roof and constant worries about health. Stressing about money and pensions. Hoping the dc's get through school and onto Uni relatively unscathed.
I'm halfway though it and it already feels like a lost decade.

43 this year. Aesthetically good. I train quite a bit and so my body is good and I’m nice looking.

Financially good.

Career. Ok.

Relationship. Ups and downs.

Mental health. Disappointing. I still have the neurosis I’ve always had.

Friendships. Fab

Interesting thread

I loved my forties. The kids had left home and the grandkids started arriving. I seemed to be rushing round all the time.
Equally, I love my fifties. I'm still rushing round 😂

I’m nearly 42 and very happy.

I’ve got more money than in my 30’s and I’m much happier with my now DP than I was with the DC’s dad. DC are getting older and I’m planning a great holiday with them this Summer. Physically my body is the same, I’ve decided to embrace the grey hair and invest the money I save from dye into Botox for my face!

Only concern I have is the health of my ageing parents. I can see that being the biggest issue over then next decade.

43 here, the last couple of years have been hellish, major relationship dramas and horrendous hormonal issues! So not great, kids are older and I seem to have lost myself a bit, I know what I need to do ( get out more, get a social life and perhaps retrain ) but don't seem to have the oomph to get there right now. I think my 40's will be a work in progress.
Objectively speaking I've never been in better physical shape than I am now and friends/ family have said I've never looked better, so that's something at least. In my 30's I couldn't have given two fucks what people think but now I give ALL the fucks. Bizarre!

Absolutely shite. 50s on the other hand....

Alright until 44 then couldn't cope with stress in the same way, hormones went mad, still got young kids so no freedom.

Roll on the 50s!!

I'm nearly 48. My 40's have been wonderful so far. I'm debt free. I'm at university for the first time, I'm fit and I have quit drinking alcohol too so feel healthy. I am obviously aging but its better than the alternative.

Bit shit as my husband died and I worry endlessly about getting a serious illness but other than that

I’ve got plenty of money
Energy is the same as in my 20’s and 30’s
Kids more independent
I feel confident and comfortable in myself
It’s pretty good.

Had my 2 babies in my 40s so life changing :) and brilliant.