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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

MIL has moved in with SIL but she has no guest bedroom - so how will we visit?

189 replies

NeedASwissBankAccount · 18/02/2020 16:31

My MIL has helped SIL buy a bigger house. On the proviso that's she live in part of the house. I've not seen it yet but it was mine and DH's understanding that MIL would have two bedrooms in her part of the house so our DC - her grandchildren could visit.
MIL is keeping her flat but moving in with SIL.
When DH went to pick up MIL it turned out her part of the property only has one bedroom.
SIL has two DC and their bit has three bedrooms - the fifth bedroom is going to be rented out so they can pay the mortgage.
Thing is MIL gave them a few hundred thousand £s so she could live there.
It's not as if we hardly spend time with MIL. DH myself and our DC often go to see her - several times a year.
Annoyed but knew this would happen...

OP posts:
CalleighDoodle · 18/02/2020 16:32

Stay in a hotel.

LeekMunchingSheepShagger · 18/02/2020 16:33

Can’t you stay in SILs spare room?

Autumn101 · 18/02/2020 16:34

Could your DC share with their cousins?

RositaEspinosa · 18/02/2020 16:34

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Seventyone72seventy3 · 18/02/2020 16:34

Not everyone has a guest bedroom available for a few times a year! You can stay in a b & b, in the living room - what is happening to MIL's flat?

Original poster
NeedASwissBankAccount · 18/02/2020 16:35

Sorry - typo- SIL has 3 DC so there's no spare room to stay in. One of the DC is 18. The two younger DC share a room.
I guess we could all pitch in...

OP posts:
BendingSpoons · 18/02/2020 16:36

It's annoying (well reading between the lines to the bigger picture it is). Can cousins share a room when you stay and you can have one of theirs?

Skyejuly · 18/02/2020 16:37

Yabu.
Stay in a b&b

Original poster
NeedASwissBankAccount · 18/02/2020 16:37

MIL plans to sell her flat - she was told she would have two bedrooms. I'm posting this for her really.

OP posts:
MummySharn · 18/02/2020 16:38

YABU, stay in a hotel

Greenglassteacup · 18/02/2020 16:38

Get a hotel???

Ponoka7 · 18/02/2020 16:38

The most important thing is that your MIL knew what she was getting and has got a good deal.

They may have mislead you, so there wasn't any interference. How old is she and how old are your children?

Itwasntme1 · 18/02/2020 16:39

She gave them a few hundred thousand and they still need to rent out a room to pay the mortgage?

Are you sure this is right?

BuffaloCauliflower · 18/02/2020 16:39

You’re not being very clear - do you mean SIL has mislead MIL and she’s not getting what she was promised?

HermioneWeasley · 18/02/2020 16:39

If your SIL is having to rent a room she’s obviously struggling to cover the mortgage and it makes no financial sense to have a room sitting empty for a few visits a year. Either you all squish in on blow up beds etc, or stay in a hotel. Premier Inns do family rooms for not a lot of £

CuriousaboutSamphire · 18/02/2020 16:39

Its irrelevant that other people don't have guest rooms. The understanding before a huge amount of money was made available was that MIL would have 2 bedrooms.

Wonder just how much they have stretched themselves I'd they have to use the 5th room to pay the mortgage and also how protected is MILs input!

As usual with such home combinations, it all sounds like a complete bag of nails. I hope your MIL protected her cash...

AryaStarkWolf · 18/02/2020 16:40

If the issue is that you think SIL conned your MIL (promising her more space for the cash than she gave then you're not BU but if it's just you being annoyed you don't have a bedroom then you are BU

Dieu · 18/02/2020 16:40

I don't think you should have been a primary concern in her house moving decision!

Original poster
NeedASwissBankAccount · 18/02/2020 16:40

Yes I'm more worried she's been misled.
But she doesn't want me to say anything... though told me she's upset about it.
Sorry posting while trying to make dinner.
My DC are 11 and 6 and MIL is 84.

OP posts:
ShowOfHands · 18/02/2020 16:40

We have never had a spare bedroom and neither do many of our friends or family members. You share, sleep on blow up mattresses/sofas or you stay in a hotel or similar.

YummyChipCurryDip · 18/02/2020 16:41

Stay in a hotel. I actually prefer a hotel when we visit mil. I like to be able to escape.

IceCreamFace · 18/02/2020 16:42

Unless MiL has been mislead surely she just decided she didn't need a dedicated spare room. I wouldn't get involved in their financial situation. Most families don't have a guest room and everyone just budges up when there are visitors (sofa bed + camp beds for kids).

Charles11 · 18/02/2020 16:42

Can’t dc stay in their cousins room? My dcs end up camping on the floor of their cousins room and have a ball and vice versa too.

If mil needs to get you involved because she’s not happy with the set up then that’s a different issue.

drivingtofrance · 18/02/2020 16:42

Errrr.. Stay in a hotel?

I would never presume that anyone would put me up if I wanted to visit them.

BeyondMyWits · 18/02/2020 16:42

Is MIL happy that her investment has ended up with her having less room than promised? Does she feel she has had to put up and shut up?

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