MIL has moved in with SIL but she has no guest bedroom - so how will we visit?

[NeedASwissBankAccount]

My MIL has helped SIL buy a bigger house. On the proviso that's she live in part of the house. I've not seen it yet but it was mine and DH's understanding that MIL would have two bedrooms in her part of the house so our DC - her grandchildren could visit.
MIL is keeping her flat but moving in with SIL.
When DH went to pick up MIL it turned out her part of the property only has one bedroom.
SIL has two DC and their bit has three bedrooms - the fifth bedroom is going to be rented out so they can pay the mortgage.
Thing is MIL gave them a few hundred thousand £s so she could live there.
It's not as if we hardly spend time with MIL. DH myself and our DC often go to see her - several times a year.
Annoyed but knew this would happen...

@NeedASwissBankAccount, you should step back but your husband really shouldn’t. There’s no way he should stand by and watch his sister abuse her mum like this. I could cry for her, this is one of the saddest stories I’ve heard in a long time.

Adopt an 'expect the best but prepare for the worst' there is very little we can actually do...apart from support MIL - and keep an eye on her. It's a bit heartbreaking

Heartbreaking indeed. All the PPs who judged you as "grabby" need to eat their words.

Your MiL is in a very risky position, and could be made homeless. I hope she'll be OK.

OP is your SIL your husband's brother's wife? Is so why are you putting all the blame on the SIL. Presumably your brother in law was involved in the decision to deprive MIL of a second bedroom?

Sil is OP’s husband’s sister. The blame is being put in precisely the right place.

The poor woman is just a cash cow for both of her kids.

I wouldn’t be surprised if your SIL has a drugs problem or shopping addiction and where on earth have they bought such an expensive house that even with your MIL’s financial contribution she is still talking about having to rent out a room to finance her house/lifestyle choices?

SIL does have an eating disorder. She had drug problems in her late teens and early 20s.
She's a strange one because she had an m/c a few years ago and DH was told by MIL it had happened but that he was not to say anything to her - not even a text to say 'hope you are okay'.
Then MIL tells us yesterday that SIL (who is in her late 40s) cannot cope with any emotion and she's too upset about m/c (she has since had 2 healthy children ) and also FIL's passing away to talk about it.
Basically we can't talk to her about anything that's likely to be emotional including all this house stuff....

Any luck with persuading her to visit a solicitor with someone she trusts who’s completely neutral? Sorry @NeedASwissBankAccount, I’m way too invested in your poor Mil.

I think I'd be tempted to talk with SIL directly and try to get her perspective.

A bit of me worries that she too could be in a vulnerable position. Has she done anything to ensure that her DH can't walk away with half her cash?

While I buy into marriage and all being equal. That doesn't extend to massive gifts intended to provide security for an individual.

MIL is going to see her solicitor as she has changed her will and she now knows how worried DH and I are about her.
She gets very very prickly when we try to point out things to her.
It's a part of the grieving process but also convinces me more she's vulnerable.
She is very protective of her Son in law - I think she's determined her daughter was going to 'marry well' and not have to work - but the only reason SIL's DH has anything is because he's benefitted from SIL having money - as MIL and FIL gave her money to buy a flat in London 12 years ago.
I always felt it was a shame to had to sell that to buy house with her DH to be who had no money to help with the deposit.

This gets worse with every update. Your mil is being financially abused, everything is shrouded in secrecy and your sil actions are not being held to account, the fact you can't even address this with her for fear of upsetting her atest to such. Everything should be in your mil best interests, this is clearly not the case. Please get proper legal advice.

The Bil is not sounding good.
Mil wanted her to marry well yet it’s her that’s put the ££ into the marriage 🤔

YummyChipCurryDip 😂😂😂 that’s my thinking exactly lol, escape is often needed. On OPs problem I think people are missing the point, she’s disappointed about the lack of spare room as it appears one of the conditions on her mum giving thousands , so her sister can buy a bigger house, is that mum is provided with two rooms!!! Sister May have took advantage

Sorry I was reading this long after it ended so still had posts to read, I must get up to date 😀