BF told DH about pregnancy before I did

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NC for this as it’s incredibly outing.

My bestie was with me at the time I took my test for moral support as DH was away with work, and I wanted to tell him in person. Ideally I would have waited until he was back, but I wanted to surprise him with the news!

Obviously the test was positive (yay ) and I was planning to tell my DH the night he came back over a nice dinner!

My bestie came round the same day (she knew what my plan was) to pick up some stuff for her house, and was still here when DH walked in. She immediately walked over to DH and started congratulating him on our pregnancy knowing full well he didn’t know !

AIBU to be annoyed ? I was really looking forward to telling DH after a nice dinner together and seeing the look on his face & she stole that from me!

Wow she sounds like a terrible person, definitely get rid. Has she done anything spiteful like this before?

Congratulations on your pregnancy. She really messed up but I’m not sure it’s worth ending a friendship over if you are extremely close (guessing you are). She probably got over excited and blurted it out, some people are rubbish at keeping secrets.

I think it was the equivalent of cocking her leg on you to mark her territory, and I'd treat it accordingly.

If someone had done that to me I'd have ripped them a new one.

Completely out of order, I'd steer well clear in future

If she'd have blurted it out from excitement she'd have been immediately embarrassed and apologetic.

Three's a crowd.

Tell her how it made you feel so she knows. Something along the lines of, 'Well, I wish you hadn't. I feel robbed of a particularly monumental moment in my marriage and family. You knew how important it was too me and it's really upset me. I thought I could trust you. I might need some distance while I calm down.'

If she’s done this at the first point of what’s going to be several very special but sometimes anxious months ahead she’s not your friend.

I know this is a crackers question but you’re not in NE Scotland are you? A story virtually identical to this came to my attention today. Guy works offshore, they’ve been trying for a while and BOOM! twat emotionally parasitic “friend” whips the happy moment right out from under them.

The fact you had been speaking about you telling him moments before and she goes in with “congratulations” is spite, jealousy, and envy, all in one action.

If it were me, I don't think our friendship could recover from that. I would start to live my life without her in it, and I certainly wouldn't be sharing any more confidential information with her as she clearly cannot be trusted.

So sorry Op. For what it's worth I think DH was first to know about our three kids. We're in our 50s and neither of us can remember the moment I told him. I only asked him because of your thread and because I can't remember. It would have been massively important at the time.

She was an arse but shes obviously an important friend to you since you chose her to be with you to take the test (bit overly dramatic tbh imo). Is she type of person who cant hold water and blurt stuff out? You know your friend and if she has faults like this and is worth keeping as a friend.

Did she manage to keep it secret for the two weeks between the pregnancy test and your DH coming home?

Way out of order

She sounds jealous and clearly can’t be trusted, definitely pull her up on it.

My ex SIL was a thunder stealer extraordinaire. I ended up telling her absolutely nothing as I found that whoever I met had heard it all from her first. Empty life I guess... Ditch this rubbish pretend friend or she will do it again

Bestie!?

You need to end your friendship

Well firstly I would say why on earth have a friend with you when you took the test? Surely after you it should be your DP who should have found out you were expecting not your "bestie". Is nothing sacred? She was definitely out of order though. If she can't keep her mouth shut about someth8ng so personal she is not a friend you can trust.

Well I normally roll my eyes about amost of the "should I still be her friend?" playgroun/drama nonsense on MN, but this is a stone cold, 100% "never have anything to do with this woman again".

She has muscled in and ruined what should have been a truly special moment for you both. I would never speak to her again (after making sure I told her why first).

Congratulations on your pregnancy.

Is your “friend” normally this way ie “can’t hold her water”?

I’m so sorry she did this, it is a shitty thing and for her to say she just got excited.......well???? I wouldn’t believe her.

Time to have a think about this friendship and if you do decide to remain friends with her, take a massive step back, DO NOT tell her the sex of the baby if you decide to find out or the names you have chosen infact tell her nothing ever again.

I don't get why you wouldn't want to tell the father of your chold straight away. I don't see why you heed moral support to do a pregnancy test, it all seems over dramatic to me so personally I think yabu.

Congratulations op!I hope your pregnancy goes well🌸🌸
Think very carefully about allowing this woman in your life.
She is jealous and scheming and spiteful and does not have your best interests at heart.
To do this to you is so nasty ,if it was,by any way accidental she would have been apologising profusely immediately . And left you two to celebrate!!
In your shoes I would cut her out of my life ,now,for good.
She's shown her colours,now you need to decide what you're going to do about it.if she gets away with it then she will see this as an open invitation to do what she likes.
Very difficult for you to lose a ' friend ' right now but better now than before she causes more damage.

That’s unforgivable