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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

BF told DH about pregnancy before I did

220 replies

Namechange112349033939838319 · 08/02/2020 19:16

NC for this as it’s incredibly outing.

My bestie was with me at the time I took my test for moral support as DH was away with work, and I wanted to tell him in person. Ideally I would have waited until he was back, but I wanted to surprise him with the news!

Obviously the test was positive (yay Smile ) and I was planning to tell my DH the night he came back over a nice dinner!

My bestie came round the same day (she knew what my plan was) to pick up some stuff for her house, and was still here when DH walked in. She immediately walked over to DH and started congratulating him on our pregnancy knowing full well he didn’t know ! Angry

AIBU to be annoyed Sad? I was really looking forward to telling DH after a nice dinner together and seeing the look on his face & she stole that from me!

OP posts:
conduitoffortune · 08/02/2020 20:08

There is no coming back from this. There is no possible reason or excuse for her doing that, what a bitch.

TheMotherofAllDilemmas · 08/02/2020 20:09

I wouldn’t confront her about that, unless she ask why we are no longer friends...

lemonysnickett88 · 08/02/2020 20:09

Any chance she fancies your other half? Or maybe it's because she's jealous you're in a place she's perhaps not- does she have children or a partner?

HeadachesByTheDozen · 08/02/2020 20:10

*for you to do this.

should be for her to do this to you.

user1493494961 · 08/02/2020 20:18

Your 'bestie' is jealous, cool the friendship as she will only cause trouble.

Orchidflower1 · 08/02/2020 20:19

@Namechange112349033939838319
I’m sad to say I feel your friend did it deliberately. Why?? Only you can find out. But you must- we will steel your thunder for everything going forward.

HouseOfCrayCray · 08/02/2020 20:19

I'd absolutely message her to see why she did that & I'd tell her to fuck off at the same time, she's no bestie. What a biatch Shock

Original poster
Namechange112349033939838319 · 08/02/2020 20:19

Text her asking why she did it and she replied saying she just got “too excited” and it blurted out. Hmm

Not sure if I believe her tbh Confused i think I really need to re-evaluate this friendship and if I believe her

OP posts:
Sagradafamiliar · 08/02/2020 20:20

It would seem to me that she's a bit of a cunt.

AriadnesFilament · 08/02/2020 20:20

got too excited

My arse. She wanted the vicarious pleasure of telling. Also known as stealing your thunder. Selfish cow. It wasn’t an accident, she did it on purpose.

HouseOfCrayCray · 08/02/2020 20:20

Got too excited, silly cow. I'm fuming for you OP. I personally could not be friends with this person. She didn't even have the decency to apologise after she's blabbed, knowing full well you had plans to tell him later.

iolaus · 08/02/2020 20:20

Bear in mind if you stay friends when you tell her anything about the baby (gender/birth/name etc) she will tell everyone immediately - it may be done in a way that seems she is excited and doesn't mean to do it - but she'll be centre of attention

She's the sort of person that seconds after you tell her on facebook she'll be tagging you in a post 'Congratulations to my bestie on the birth of her beautiful baby girl. 7lb 3oz, absolutely stunning so proud of you - can't wait to meet little Babyname' - sharing your news

TaliZorahVasNormandy · 08/02/2020 20:21

Jesus, talk about pissing on someone's parade.

Over excited my arse. I've been excited over my close friends pregnancies and successfully managed to keep my mouth shut.

IhateBoswell · 08/02/2020 20:26

That's just weird. I'm not violent but I would've skull-dragged her out

speakout · 08/02/2020 20:27

Your OH should know before your BF.

rumandbiscuits · 08/02/2020 20:28

Are you really asking this question? If you are certain that he didn't know but she continued to congratulate him then there is something seriously wrong with her, she's dangerous and you need to stay away!!

FizzyGreenWater · 08/02/2020 20:28

You need to get rid.

Text her:

'I think I was in too much shock - that someone could possibly do something like that - to react properly. I'm reacting now. Don't contact me again.'

SlapItOn · 08/02/2020 20:29

Congratulations OP!

Sounds like your friend has some serious issues.
She stole a moment from you that you can never get back. Inserted herself into your relationship when it was absolutely not appropriate. That was not excitement, that was a severe lack of boundaries and smacks of some weird kind of jealousy. How could she think that she should be part of that moment?
I would have been waiting by the phone for you to tell me how it’d gone and got far more pleasure from that, than stealing your thunder. Bin her.

LangSpartacusCleg · 08/02/2020 20:30

I’d be massively pissed off in your shoes. And I would text back something like ‘that’s you off the list for godmother then’ just to see her response. If you change your mind later, just remind her that she was ‘too excited’ and in the same way, you were ‘too upset’.

FizzyGreenWater · 08/02/2020 20:30

And yes you need to dump her - it's not just a case of 'how dare she' - this is the kind of 'friend' who shits on you, who will stab you in the back, who doesn't have your back. Really really really listen to the posts on here - this is the kind of friend you will regret keeping in your life. Get rid NOW.

OscarWildesCat · 08/02/2020 20:31

WTF?, that's out of order OP and I think I'd tell her so.....

Guacamole · 08/02/2020 20:31

She’s not your friend, and I don’t believe for a second she got excited and blurred it out. She might be jealous of you and your relationship. If she is, she’ll get worse.

Confuddledtown · 08/02/2020 20:31

I'm sorry but I would find that unforgivable

Interestedwoman · 08/02/2020 20:32

WTF No! YANBU

TeeniefaeTroon · 08/02/2020 20:33

There would be no going back for me, I'd be absolutely fuming! What a complete cow!