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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

DH wants us to go on holiday to somewhere I don't

218 replies

Realitea · 04/02/2020 11:51

DH has said he's tired of me choosing where we go on holiday. In the past he's just said he's happy to go wherever so I spend ages researching places and booking somewhere I think everyone will like.

He said this morning he wants us to try something different and go somewhere else. No beach, not much there from what I can see and it's near Afghanistan. I really don't think this is the ideal place for a family holiday at all. I know he's adventurous but this is madness.

He's now in a huff because I immediately said no. He said we won't go anywhere in that case which I thought was a bit of an over reaction. I don't know what's got into him recently. AIBU to say no straight away to this?

OP posts:
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TeaForTara · 07/02/2020 09:48

Axis not access.

Samhradh · 07/02/2020 10:00

But it's still a very, very authoritarian government - more like North Korea than Russia (or more liberal than Turkmenistan but less than Kyrgyzstan, if comparing to other post-Soviet Central Asian states). So there's an ethical question, if that's something that bothers you - do you want to give money to one of the world's most repressive governments? That may not bother you, but if it does then I wouldn't go to Uzbekistan.

While I entirely agree that this is a fair point, Mumsnetters regularly go to Dubai and shrilly defend their decision to do so on the grounds of 'if you chose holiday destinations on the basis of the ethics of their governments/rulers, you'd never go anywhere' -- the UAE gets 17 out of 100 (one point less than Iran), compared to the UK's 98.

Alsohuman · 07/02/2020 10:33

I really wish I hadn’t opened this thread. Uzbekistan has now been added to my list of places I really want to go.

IntermittentParps · 07/02/2020 10:38

Uzbekistan has now been added to my list of places I really want to go.
I know! Well, it was on mine already, but in a vague way. Now there are little voices in my head saying 'It's a sign! It must be meant to be!'

Did anyone see the programme where Michael Palin went to North Korea? Fascinating but sad and anger-making. He visited a woman scraping a subsistence living on a tiny bit of land, clearly malnourished, rhapsodising about the time some officials visited and brought her delicious fish, with a picture of the Glorious Leader on her house/shack wall. I got the impression she remembered the fish so well because it was the only time she'd eaten anything not rice and vegetables in years.

vagmons · 07/02/2020 12:51

We travelled to Uzbekistan with our 5 year old and we all loved it. The history is fascinating with just enough gore for kids to find interesting. It is safe and easy (posters suggesting Vietnam as an alternative - haha - I lived in Vietnam and can assure you Uz is much ‘easier’.

And as to contributing to regimes with poor human rights records - the worst possible thing is to isolate the people of these countries. Go, talk to people, connect with you, learn, share. I say that as someone who (1) works in human rights and (2) lives/works somewhere with a poor human rights record. (And perhaps also learn more about how oppressive regimes have been allowed to flourish..propped up by countries like the U.K...)

lalta · 07/02/2020 15:05

why not india its safe and a beautiful country

Sossadtoday · 07/02/2020 15:27

Could I possibly have a link to the information on how free each individual country is? Sorry I did see the name back a bit but can't remember which page. How lucky are we to be 98/100?

IntermittentParps · 07/02/2020 15:28

lalta, the level of violence against women in India is shocking.
In terms of human rights, too, it is nothing to write home about.
But I do agree, in my (very limited!) experience it is absolutely beautiful and fascinating. Then again, Uzbekistan probably is too.

vagmons, that's an interesting perspective on contributing to regimes with poor human rights records. I've never quite known how to think and feel about it.

Sossadtoday · 07/02/2020 15:28

why not india its safe and a beautiful country it is, but pretty much guaranteed stomach problems and it's very full on culturally. I've spent a few months there in a couple of occasions and you do need to take a deep breath! Wonderful place though for sure

cardibach · 07/02/2020 21:32

Sossad I went to Rajasthan for 2 weeks with two teenagers and none of us has any form of stomach upset. It’s not inevitable at all.

saraclara · 07/02/2020 21:55

Uzbekistan is far FAR easier to travel in than India! I've done both several times, and while India is wonderful, it can be really hard work.

Better transport, cleanliness, hospitality, safety and general helpfulness of people make Uzbekistan a vastly more comfortable and relaxed trip than India, imo.

Sossadtoday · 08/02/2020 19:07

cardibach you must be only one in a zillion not to get ill then, most people do it's just a fact of life out there

Aridane · 08/02/2020 21:23

Make it two in a zillion then

cardibach · 09/02/2020 14:53

Week there were 3 of us Sossad, so with Aridane we are up to 4...

cardibach · 09/02/2020 14:54

Well not week....

StrangeLookingParasite · 10/02/2020 16:59

why not india its safe and a beautiful country

Safe? Not if your female it's not. And there's no way on earth I'm supporting a government that just does not care about violence against women.

StrangeLookingParasite · 10/02/2020 17:00

*you're

Oh the shame.

IntermittentParps · 10/02/2020 17:09

you must be only one in a zillion not to get ill then, most people do it's just a fact of life out there

My DP and I and our two friends didn't. 'a fact of life'? Confused I don't think so.

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