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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

DH wants us to go on holiday to somewhere I don't

218 replies

Realitea · 04/02/2020 11:51

DH has said he's tired of me choosing where we go on holiday. In the past he's just said he's happy to go wherever so I spend ages researching places and booking somewhere I think everyone will like.

He said this morning he wants us to try something different and go somewhere else. No beach, not much there from what I can see and it's near Afghanistan. I really don't think this is the ideal place for a family holiday at all. I know he's adventurous but this is madness.

He's now in a huff because I immediately said no. He said we won't go anywhere in that case which I thought was a bit of an over reaction. I don't know what's got into him recently. AIBU to say no straight away to this?

OP posts:
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5
saraclara · 04/02/2020 13:18

Will you go with a travel company, OP? Or independently? To be honest I only stayed in little guesthouses and hostels, so I don't really know about pool availability. I still came across families with kids though.

AryaStarkWolf · 04/02/2020 13:20

Usually since having our dd we've done resorts in more usual places like spain, portugal etc.

I can see why he's fed up tbh, I hate those type of all holidays, each one is exactly the same as the last imo

lovelyupnorth · 04/02/2020 13:23

YABU - can I go in your place. Looks awesome one to add to our list

Currently holidaying in Ghana which is fantastic.

Mayorquimby2 · 04/02/2020 13:23

"He's now in a huff because I immediately said no"

I'd be even more in a huff now.
He suggests it = immediate no
Friend says it's actually quite good = I've made my mind up, we're going.

Justcallmebebes · 04/02/2020 13:25

If it is Kazakhstan, the US rates it as one of the safest countries in the world to visit

BrimfulofSasha · 04/02/2020 13:25

It sounds like, now your DD is 10, your husband wants to move away from the (boring) beach resorts he has 'suffered' since becoming a father.
If this is the first place he has shown an interest in in 10 years and you have flat out said no that is really unfair of you.

There are lots of amazing places around Afghanistan...I'm a bit of an adventurer though and like to go off the beaten track...my DD (also 10) has been brought up knowing nothing else.

PooWillyBumBum · 04/02/2020 13:26

I’m glad you’re embracing a holiday off the beaten track. I think you’ll have a great time and I’m jealous!

JessJonesJumps · 04/02/2020 13:27

I've always wanted to go to the 'stans. Have a fantastic time OP.

Sammi38 · 04/02/2020 13:33

I would love to go to Uzbekistan, would it be suitable for a 3 year old?

BrimfulofSasha · 04/02/2020 13:35

Just RTFT well done OP. You will have to let us all know how it goes.

eurochick · 04/02/2020 13:35

A colleague is just back from there and had a great time. I'd never heard of it as a holiday destination before but it sounds really interesting.

ScatteredMama82 · 04/02/2020 13:39

Highly recommend trying holidays that aren't just beach resorts. We've got 2 kids, currently aged 5 & 10. They've been with us to Hungary, Czech Republic, Slovenia and Slovakia. This year we are taking a motorhome into the mountains in Canada, and they following year we hope to do a new glamping experience in the hills of Slovakia. Don't be put off by the unfamiliar, Uzbekistan looks amazing!

TeaForTara · 04/02/2020 13:44

Uzbekistan is quite high on my bucket list; I'd love to go there. Sounds like its popularity has soared in recent years; maybe I should bump it up a few places.

NoIDontWatchLoveIsland · 04/02/2020 13:44

I would not describe this as a "holiday". I would describe this as "travelling". The difference being whether it's easy/relaxing (holiday) or interesting etc (travel).

TeaForTara · 04/02/2020 13:49

I would not describe this as a "holiday". I would describe this as "travelling". The difference being whether it's easy/relaxing (holiday) or interesting etc (travel).

We clearly have different definitions. If/when I go to Uzbekistan it will probably be on an organised tour where I just book the trip then everything else is arranged for me - hotels, transport, sightseeing. To me, that's a "holiday". "Travelling" would be booking a flight there and maybe the first hotel in advance, then using public transport to get from place to place and deciding how long I wanted to spend in each city and not having to follow anyone else's itinerary.

Boredisboring · 04/02/2020 13:59

We're planning to do a tour of the 'stans' for our next family holiday.

unlikelytobe · 04/02/2020 14:05

We went to Uzbekistan a few years ago - flew direct from BHX! We loved it, very interesting and not hard work to get around independently . Samarkand, Bukhara and Khiva all fab. Silk Road splendid architecture, bazaars, tea houses, camels, carpets! Very hot in the summer though.

crosspelican · 04/02/2020 14:05

I would love to go to Uzbekistan! Lucky. It's so beautiful.

Butterflyflower1234 · 04/02/2020 14:13

OP in future perhaps you could hear your DP out instead of shooting him down straight away. That must be a horrible way to be in a relationship.

lovelyupnorth · 04/02/2020 14:27

@NoIDontWatchLoveIsland
Couldn’t disagree more this would be my perfect holiday could think of nothing worse than doing just a relaxing / beach holiday it would do my nut in.

Aridane · 04/02/2020 14:30

The only problem with Uzbekistan now is that it is so touristy and on the beaten (Silk Road) track. You will be joining fellow coachloads of travellers.

The above is not by way of travel snobbery about Uzbekistan but by way of reassurance that Uzbekistan is on the beaten track (albeit not on your beaten track).

And it is stunning!

cologne4711 · 04/02/2020 14:33

OP in future perhaps you could hear your DP out instead of shooting him down straight away. That must be a horrible way to be in a relationship

Can people stick to the point please and not be nasty? There's no need for this comment or the other one about divorce.

AmICrazyorWhat2 · 04/02/2020 14:40

I want to go to Uzbekistan now!

I'm glad you're giving it a try, OP. I think your DD is old enough to enjoy something other than a resort holiday now (although those are super-relaxing grin]) and you might both love it!

My DH took DD (then 13) on an amazing Asian holiday visiting several countries. OK, she was older, but she loved it. We've travelled to both resorts and more adventurous destinations, my DC have been fine.

MrsTerryPratchett · 04/02/2020 14:41

It's on my list. I used to work with an Uzbek women and she encouraged me (whereas the people from China I know looked bemused when I went there).

One thing people don't think about is crime directed at foreigners. The worst is in places where a lot of tourists go. It's an industry in Thailand, Spain, America. But if you go off the beaten track, particularly with governments who are maybe a little scary, you aren't a target. Partially because people are worried about what the police would do and partially because they don't really know what to do with you.

Off the beaten track in China, Nicaragua etc. I've felt incredibly safe. LA and Barcelona, it's money stuffed into socks and a hand on the bag at all times. I bet Uzbekistan is safer in that way.

Dunin · 04/02/2020 14:51

I wouldn’t be taking my kids anywhere near that region, sorry. I just don’t think it’s worth the risk. There are plenty of safer places in the world. Why doesn’t he take a week and go on his own? No reason why he can’t go explore.