DH wants us to go on holiday to somewhere I don't

[Realitea]

DH has said he's tired of me choosing where we go on holiday. In the past he's just said he's happy to go wherever so I spend ages researching places and booking somewhere I think everyone will like.

He said this morning he wants us to try something different and go somewhere else. No beach, not much there from what I can see and it's near Afghanistan. I really don't think this is the ideal place for a family holiday at all. I know he's adventurous but this is madness.

He's now in a huff because I immediately said no. He said we won't go anywhere in that case which I thought was a bit of an over reaction. I don't know what's got into him recently. AIBU to say no straight away to this?

Sorry, this is less about the destinations and more about your attitude to him.
For years he has agreed to your ideas of holidays, but the first suggestion he makes , you flat out say no. That is a disgraceful thing to say and I would be fuming if my DH did the same.
Why should he then accept your recommendations when you wont even consider his, its not an over reaction at all.
Now after speaking to friends, you want to go, which means his view is worth even less.
I suggest you apologise profusely to him and promise to change your attitude.

I wouldn’t be taking my kids anywhere near that region, sorry. I just don’t think it’s worth the risk.

But the country is pretty safe. Do you not go to France because Germany has terrible food. Or not do to Thailand because of China's awful human rights record? It shares a tiny border with Afghanistan, which they'd be going nowhere near.

Uzbekistan? I'd go. My mum and I always planned to go and never got around to it before she got too old

not much there from what I can see

way to describe one of the most site rich places on the Silk Road!!

My friend went to Uzbekistan last year. She went cycling. By all accounts it's pretty undeveloped and not really geared up for huge amounts of tourism but she had a great time. No kids though.

not much there from what I can see

It's shit innit?

YABU to immediately say no to something you didn't know anything about. No wonder he was upset.

Fine to have been surprised and said you'd like to look into it, but a straight out just looks closed minded.

I know of 2 separate people how been to Uzbekistan in the past year or two, and both enjoyed it, but they are both over 60, retired, and it wasn’t their sole major holiday.

I wouldn’t think it’s a place to take a 10 year old, not if you want them to enjoy their holiday, or unless they’re a very unusual 10 year old. I gather you need to be on an organised tour, with an awful lot of hither and thither, coaches and flights here and there, guided tours of lots of buildings, mosques etc. One of those who went said that although it was very interesting she did get ‘mosqued out’!

And before any hyper-woke MNer raises a racist flag, it’s the same as I’ve heard people saying about ancient Egyptian sites - ‘tombed out’ and a brother of mine in Bulgaria - ‘churched out’.

I've been templed out in Cambodia.

Spsin to Uzbekistan seems like a huge jump! Maybe he just wants to go somewhere a bit more exciting now your dd is a bit older. If so, why not suggest somewhere a bit more exciting like South America or even Vietnam, India or Thailand?

why not suggest somewhere a bit more exciting like South America or even Vietnam, India or Thailand?

Every single one of those countries/areas, I would guess, is less safe than Uzbekistan. I mean India? With their current issues with women. A 10 year old girl? Not to mention air quality and health concerns.

People can find it so hard to think beyond the conventional.

We went to Berlin for a week with our then 5 year old. A couple of people wondered what on earth we'd do there for a Whole Week. I can't abide that 'do Venice' 'do Barcelona' mentality.

Last year we went overland from home to Zagreb. It was fab.

OP, Uzbekistan has an appalling record on human rights. Your money will be supporting a government that allows torture, slavery and child labour -- but not homosexuality or free speech. Governments like this rely on income from people who don't care.

I'm sure your choices were better!

From en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Uzbekistan :
Human rights organisations ... define Uzbekistan as "an authoritarian state with limited civil rights"[15] and express profound concern about "wide-scale violation of virtually all basic human rights".

... The most widespread violations are torture, arbitrary arrests, and various restrictions of freedoms: of religion, of speech and press, of free association and assembly. It has also been reported that forced sterilisation of rural Uzbek women has been sanctioned by the government.
... The Freedom House has consistently ranked Uzbekistan near the bottom of its Freedom in the World ranking since the country's founding in 1991. In the 2018 report, Uzbekistan was one of the 11 worst countries for Political Rights and Civil Liberties.[53]
... The government of Uzbekistan is accused of unlawful termination of human life and of denying its citizens freedom of assembly and freedom of expression.
... Male homosexuality is illegal in Uzbekistan.[59]
... Uzbekistan also maintains the world's second-highest rate of modern slavery, 3.97%[61] of the country's population working as modern slaves.
... World Bank loans have been connected to projects that use child labour and forced labour practices in the cotton industry.[63]

I mean India? With their current issues with women. A 10 year old girl? Not to mention air quality and health concerns.

You know India is HUGE, right?
Granted, you may wish to avoid a country which treats girls and women so poorly, but there are plenty of place with good air, and with the right precautions you can stay healthy.

We took our 7 yo to India for 4 months.

The only problem with Uzbekistan now is that it is so touristy and on the beaten (Silk Road) track. You will be joining fellow coachloads of travellers.

Mmmm. And about 8 years ago, my parents came home from a 3-week coach trip there with tuberculosis. More original than tourist photos, I'll grant you, but check your jabs.

Why there? What appeals to him? What does he want to do there? It wouldn't be somewhere I'd be heading off to, but there have to be some other places in the world that he'd consider and that you'd be happy with also.

Uzkbekistan is an amazing country, you're so lucky to be going there. We don't do beach holidays and have been to some fantastic places.

Just to add, I wouldn’t think the sort of sightseeing tour which is almost inevitably going to be 98% adults, would be most children’s idea of fun at all.
Whether it be Uzbekistan, India, Vietnam/Cambodia, etc.
IMO that’s the sort of thing to do when kids are a lot older and v likely won’t be coming anyway.

If it were me, OP, and your OH is fixed on it, why not let him go and you and your dd go to your choice of holiday?

All the more reason to do it with children, they learn so much and are likely to really be fascinated by it. Mine have been to all kinds of places off the beaten track and don't like conventional holidays at all - we went to Florida and did 1 morning at Disneyworld for them to do their favourite rides and then they wanted to go and do something more interesting. We take it in turns to choose where we go on holiday - last year we went to Moscow and St Petersburg at my youngest's request, the year before we went to Sweden at my eldest's request.

I’ll be jealous of a holiday to Uzbekistan. It’s on our list of places to go to. Our family would hate a resort holiday in the Mediterranean but an adventure would be brilliant.

It's a big world out there, surely you can find somewhere you both fancy.

Don't you just love reading a thread where the OP has been open minded, realised they were a bit unreasonable, have some new ideas and is happily solving the situation offline by page 2, and people are insulting the OP for future pages.

My sister just took 6 months off to travel and she visited all the "stans" (except Afghanistan!) and she said it was amazing. The pictures were beautiful. There seem to be a lot of people visiting these "off the beaten path" places. I say go for it!

That sounds a little bit racist, ozy. Not nice. Or accurate. Less than 25% of the population of Bradford is from Asia. Not all of those are from Pakistan ,so...