My manager just sent me a ridiculous email!

[ItalianinLondon]

I've been off work sick for the last 3 weeks on my GP's insistence (I have lupus and had some viral things going on and GP said not taking time off would be a bad idea).

My line manager has been calling me at various points during this period and, to not make the story overly lengthy, called (from a blocked number) on Friday evening and I couldn't hear anything wheni picked up, assumed it was a cold call and hung up.

She then sent me an email yesterday accusing me of childish and insulting behaviour, because I'd clearly, quote, stuffed the phone under a pillow and pretended I couldn't hear when I realised it was her.

Obviously it is not something I would do, however tempting it might be... so I denied it, and we got into a bit of a back and forward by email.

I said it was a very insulting allegation and that she should apologise, to which I got:

"As for pretending that you couldn’t hear me on the phone, I know what I heard, and I was convinced that you answered and then made a pretence. I was shocked beyond measure that a colleague could behave like that. It embarrasses me to talk or think about it."

Although she has clearly managed to talk and think about it quite a lot...

Anyway, I contacted HR today and said I found it really weird for her to make totally demented accusations about me (paraphrase). They were clearly quite shocked when I said what was in the email and asked me to forward the emails.

Should I do it?? Without her consent? I hate to make a big fuss, and my bad temper has simmered down now, but seriously, I think she has gone a bit crazy over this and it is kind of concerning!

I was off long term sick before I was finished at work, I only worked term time. I had exhausted my sick pay, during the school holidays my manager rang me when I was sat on the beach on a short break before my next operation. I was fuming, they weren't paying me & I wasn't contracted to work during school holidays anyway.

Its fantastic that she has actually put this in writing!
Crack on op

For those commenting about calling out to sick people, where I work its part of our policy - you should expect a call daily from your manager to check in. As I manager I don't like doing it and rarely do but have been made to by HR in the past when they became suspicious.

Andtwomakesix, fine in your case, but the OP says 'And no, she's not supposed to be contacting me - if anything needs passing on, our organisation policy is that it goes through HR!'

I got an email back from HR asking if I would be happy to have a chat on the phone with our senior HR person today. I said yes - so, we shall see!

@IntermittentParps unfortunately I don't think the teacher LOL'd! She rung up DH and said, "It was really quite difficult to explain to the other children!"

@AJPTaylor Yeah, I think the HR woman I spoke to yesterday could not believe she'd put it in writing!

She rung up DH and said, "It was really quite difficult to explain to the other children!" Poor woman. Who'd be a teacher?

Good luck talking to HR today. Maybe take notes.

She shouldn't be phoning you when you're off sick anyway so even if you had pretended you couldn't hear her, she would still be in the wrong. Is that 7:15am she phoned? That's so out of order when you're sick

Just send them.

You’ve been off sick for 3 weeks on the advice of someone with a medical degree and this bitch face has been calling, accusing you of lying.

Yes I’d complain....

Best of luck with phone call.

And who's voting yabu?

Good luck OP. She sounds like a manager I once has. I wish I’d had your gumption to deal with it!

It's great she put this on writing,makes it all so much easier for you.

Hope the chat goes well. I always use a burner phone for any work contact. The phone is just for that. Never give them a personal number. She's way out of line.

Good luck with the phone call, definitely the right thing to do.

It sounds like HR are quite rightly taking this very seriously. Just to say, please don’t downplay it on the phone - she’s behaved in an appalling, bullying (and illegal!) manner and if she’s doing it to you she’ll do it to others. She needs to be disciplined for this.

AryaStarkWolf, the OP says it was Friday evening. Just as out of order as if she'd called in the morning.

@IntermittentParps Yes still out of order but AM seems alot worse to me (definitely not a morning person here)

I am more of a morning person, I admit. I think outside of office hours, whichever way round it is, is inexcusable. Even if she was permitted by company policy to contact the OP while off sick, which she isn't.

It might be worth mentioning to HR how many times you have already answered the phone and spoken to this woman since you have been off work ill, if you have not already done so.

I hope you feel better soon although I imagine lupus is very difficult to live with

OP, please keep an audit trail of all emails, plus the number of times the manager has contacted you by phone. It sounds like definite, deliberate harrassment to me.

Our company (supermarket) policy is to visit people at home when they're off sick!!! Currently a colleague is off sick due to planned surgery, she was visited last week by 2 managers. I think it happens after 6-8wks off, I'm assuming they go to offer any help or support??

Strategicchoring, I agree. And also mention the previous accusations of making up that you had a health condition for leniency.

Forward them to HR - she should not be contacting you at all when you are signed off work. Have no further contact with her. If anyone needs to find out how you are doing it should be HR contacting you, not your boss. I speak from experience.

Our company (supermarket) policy is to visit people at home when they're off sick!!!

Crikey, that sounds intrusive. I'm surprised it's legal tbh!

Fucking Boris Johnson

That's had me in stitches