To complain to head teacher about finding my 5 yr old in playground at home time

[Tessadavies1001]

My daughter started at a new school today.The school made a big deal about making sure I filled in the forms about who collected her and handed it today or she couldnt start only for me to turn up to pick her up and find they don't have her. She had wondered out.We found her in the playground in a sea of parents,kids looking around and scared not far from the exit. The teacher blamed her and said she kept trying to find me but surely this would of made them keep and eye on her more.There is a teacher and 3 TAs.They have a system where they queue up out side in from of gate and she had gone through the gate while her teacher wasn't looking.In her previous school they didn't let children out unless the parent was there so she assumed I was outsid and behind the gate.Her teacher told her off and told me to make sure to tell her she needs to wait and that was that. Im in shock at what could of happened if she wandered out ,got run over or abducted.Imagine I had been late and they hadn't realised.My mum saying not to complain since it's her first day because and the teacher might resent me or my daughter for getting her in trouble with head but that sounds really backward.What should I do?

I don't know how it all became about me being late.The teachers DID fail to safeguard my child
If you were not late your child would still be with the teacher. You should have found out which door they come out of. You planned on being 5 minutes late, went to wrong door so you were probably more than 5 minutes late. Take collecting your child more seriously and less selfishly.

@Pudcat I totally disagree with you. I never said I planned to be 5 minutes LATE.Why on Earth would I plan to be "late".I have actually made it clear that I was not late according to the school in my previous posts.People seem to be taking rules from their school and emposing it on me.Apparently in some.schools turn up 5 minutes after the school officially ends means a 30 pound finds and serious neglect.Yes ,her school finishes at 3.30 BUT there is a 15 minute collection window probably because being a small village school the collection area is not big enough for everyone to come at once.The front gate is the size of small door. But if a parent had actually planned to be late I'd get they would be wrong but never ever responsible a child they left in the responsibility of a teacher.The child should be supervised until the parents arrive but school should share their concern.

*fines

Small village school and 3 teaching assistants to one class??

Where is this dream school?

I planned to pick her up at 3.35 and she finishes 3.30. That is planning to be late. Your child's first day at the school and you do not know where to pick her up, so you should arrive 5 minutes early to find out from other parents. Do take some responsability for your child. What would happen if all parents planned to be 5 minutes late?

I think it should not matter how late a parent arrives

Of course it does! They are not paid to take care of your child beyond 3.30pm.

You need to be there 5 mins before, not 5 mins after.

It's not ideal to be late for pickup but I think it's a bit of a red herring and some people are just piling in because that seems to be the culture round here these days.

Letting a child out without a parent or carer being present is absolutely a safeguarding issue. (Bit concerned a safeguarding lead said it isn't ) The school is in loco parentis until the child has been released to a parent or carer (or social services if they're really late being picked up.) I'm a preschool trustee (and ex teacher) and we had an incident where a child got out of the gate without an adult but was still in school grounds. We had to self report to ofsted and do an audit of all relevant policies and procedures, then undergo an ofsted inspection which was triggered by the self reporting.

In your position OP, I'd have a look through the school's policies (should be on website) and find the relevant parts around end of day and escaped children, then take it to the head and find out how your child was allowed to leave without being released to an adult. If you're not satisfied with the outcome from school you are within your rights to report it to ofsted.

I don’t get the 15 minute collection window thing, assuming as you say it is to avoid congestion at pick-up. Does this apply to drop-off as well? In theory, all parents could still be there for 3.30pm if they wanted.

As for your 5 year old daughter being able to get out of sight of the teachers and potentially leave the school premises - totally unacceptable and a major safeguarding issue and what was the teacher thinking trying to blame the child? I would have to bring this up with the school and if the teacher behaved negatively towards you and your child as a result, that would have to brought up as well.

@Rumnraisin yes Same @JemimaPuddleCat yes dream school until none of them see your child walk out.But not sure they all Stay until end of day.@pudcat it took me 2 mins to find her class , and If all parents came 5 minutes into the 15 min they could collect I'm assuming it would get very crowded the same as if all arrived at 3.30.
JellyTeapot yes the "late" thing is defo a red herring.Like I said school does not consider me as late.

Right, so what should the teacher have done when your child was insistent on going out? Restrain them? Grab them by the arm and pull back? Shove everyone else out of the way to reach your child?

I'm sorry, but I don't think the 'late thing' is a red herring. Having seen three children through school, I always planned to be there before the end of the school day - and if you had done that, your dd would have come out into your care.

When my boys were in the Infants, school policy was not to let them out until the teacher had seen the person who was picking them up - but teachers are human, and if the child says 'I can see Mummy', and dashes out, the teacher might not be able to stop them (and can't chase them because they still have a bunch of other children to look after).

If I were you, I'd contact the school and ask to clarify the hand-over procedure for your dd's class - does the teacher have to see the parent/carer before releasing the child, and also to ask how you can work with the school to ensure that yesterday's incident does not recur.

Being the 1st day is even more reason to get there early, not late, ffs.

Everyone excited. Every parent wanting to say hello to the teacher. No one 100% on the process...you should have obviously planned to be early.

That being said, the teacher is at fault for letting your child out of her care in this manner.

(Our school has a dual safeguarding process; teacher at class door; with the caretaker & senior staff member at the 2 external exit points).

A quiet word only will suffice. And get there on time for the next few weeks.

So what happens if op wasn't there. Ignoring the fact op was late (choice or not). Anything could have happened to op she could have been in the back of an ambulance for all the school know.

We have a 5 year old wandering around the playground unaccounted for, I'd really not be happy with that. She could have even left the school grounds without anyone realising.

I’d expect the teacher to restrain my 5 year old child if she was trying to leave the school yes.

Op the school near my kids have the same as yours, I think it’s pickup between 3.30-4. It’s so everyone isn’t there at the same time. As it’s so close to my kids school it would be bedlam otherwise.

I haven’t been late much but I have been late in my life, I expect that my child will be there when I arrive and the staff not just say ‘not our problem we have no idea where they’ve gone it’ll teach you for being late’ 🤣. If the teacher apologised and was mortified I’d move on from it but her attitude stunk!

I didn't think teachers were allowed restrain children and if they did you'd have parents on here complaining that is wrong too. Schools do not have a pick up window either, don't be ridiculous, they have a finish time. You are blaming everyone but yourself and can't see you're being unreasonable. How about you take some responsibility?
By the way on a different note am I alone in wondering why people keep saying teachers are not childminders or babysitters, I know they're not but why is it anymore acceptable to be late picking a child up from the childminders than it is from school?

omg you’re so funny hun.

Some of us take safeguarding of our children seriously.

You’re pretty hilarious yourself tbf.

It should not matter if the parent is late but this is one of the reasons I have massive anxiety about being there on time. It is unacceptable and a safeguarding issue that they allowed her out. This happened at my dc school and the child who was also 5 was missing for an hour. Definitely complain

I thought you were both wrong until i read your posts.
How could you plan to come after her finish time?
Her first day and you couldn't be on time, that must have been so upsetting for her!
If you didn’t want to be there with a bugger fair enough, but plan to be there early, don’t do that to your little one.

You planned to be 5 minutes late. On the first day of a new school. And you don't think you did anything wrong. Unbelievable Parent of the year or what!

If you were on time it wouldn't have happened - she would have seen you - all happy. Every day is a learning experience.

It should not matter if the parent is late

The adults may think this. But I guarantee you that it matters to the children.

@FamilyOfAliens oh I agree on that score. It's upsetting for the children. I hate to think of my dc not seeing me as soon she finishes. You should do everything possible to be there waiting. I meant in terms of school responsibility it shouldn't matter if the parent is late. The school is responsible for the child until the parent arrives

Thank you so much guys but I'm going to side with the quilified teachers on this one! Thanks to singleedition all the other teachers who have confirmed that the teacher was the one at fault and for confirming it is indeed a safeguarding issue and failure, and well done to all the parents who actually feel teachers have a duty to protect their children when they leave them in their care.I am very lucky that the head teacher was so lovely about it all.

Shame on the people who seem to be hell bent claiming I was late because of 5 minute's.
I personally refuse to be guilt tripped into thinking I was some how to blame for teachers allowing my child to wonder off and not handing her over to me as promised.I will be arriving 5 minutes early today not so I can be on 'time' as I was never late to begin with and I'm sticking to my guns! but because I feel I can't trust the teacher.I think I've have enough of this thread now. Ta-ra

• Teacher shouldn’t have lost track of her.
• Teacher shouldn’t have blamed child for teacher’s failure, or told her off on her first day.
• You should NOT have been late, particularly on her first day. You bear as much blame as much the teacher for how it played out. Pickup time is a deadline, aim to be there at least 5 minutes before, or you’re delaying the children who the teacher has to take to after school club / delaying the teacher’s next tasks. You are not the only parent who has a buggy!
• Complain to the Head if you want but you have to have a relationship with this teacher until summer, seems odd way to start it particularly as it was also your fault.

Bloody hell of course you should be on time to collect your child but inevitably you won't be there on the dot all the time. What if your car breaks down or you're in a car accident or are taken suddenly ill. The school have a duty of care to make sure the children are safe - they can't just shrug their shoulders at 3:20 and let the kids run off anywhere.