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Can't believe I'm even posting this. Christmas dinner highchair'gate'

831 replies

Nobhobs · 29/11/2019 11:49

Spending Christmas with DH, DS and the in laws. We're weaning DS so mentioned in passing bringing his high chair so he can sit with us during Christmas dinner (if he's not napping or anything like that) he's very alert and active and gets arsey if not being entertained. He loves being in his high chair and round the table and it's his first Christmas so we're a bit excited (yes I know he worn remember it)

MIL has said we can't bring his highchair, as her other sons baby will only be 8 weeks old and can't sit in one and we can't leave out one of the babies on Christmas Day. I laughed thinking it was a bad joke, but no, deadly serious.

We sort of ignored and thought we'd deal with it on the day, but had a text from 8 week olds mum saying that MIL had told her we were going to try and leave her child out and that she's not happy about it. Her baby will be the only one not in the Christmas dinner photos if we bring our highchair Hmm I said well obviously baby can be held up in the photos if that's what's upsetting you, DS is at the age where he doesn't just nap constantly and wants to be involved and entertained and it's nothing to do with leaving her child out.

It's totally ridiculous and DH is now saying just to leave the highchair at home to avoid drama. I've never had any issues with the in laws before and I'm mind blown by how stupid this is. Or am I BU? Is this a thing?! If one babies on the floor they all have to be?? Hmm

OP posts:
Irisloulou · 30/11/2019 17:42

Mil has a favourite clearly.
“We’re bringing the high chair or we’re not coming! “
Mine sat in a bouncy chair on the table ( *look away health visitors) or lay on a mat, babies are social!

*all grown, no one fell😀

Ali154 · 30/11/2019 17:44

Stay at home and enjoy a lovely time with your little one. It’s their loss

user1485851222 · 30/11/2019 17:44

Have you told MIL you aren't going, if so what did she say?

Notasmugknob · 30/11/2019 17:45

MIL are always lovely until the maternal grandchild comes along, then everything you do will be questioned unless it’s the same as SIL. My (ex) MIL used to have my children 2x a week one Monday one Friday, when SIL had her baby suddenly she had 4/5 days a week and MIL could only do one child once a week 9-3

StarClaws · 30/11/2019 17:53

Send your in-laws a link to the Sun article

EstrellaGalicia · 30/11/2019 17:59

As a previous poster said, I would let MIL make the decision. Either take the highchair or you are staying home because otherwise you won't enjoy your meal because you will be too busy dealing with a bored grouchy baby and if you do end up taking the high chair and SIL gets grouchy tell her she's welcome to sit in it herself when DS isn't using it because quite frankly she's acting like a child herself.

PrettyPurse · 30/11/2019 18:04

@Nobhobs - so what are you going to do?

BackforGood · 30/11/2019 18:05

Good decsision OP and great news your dh and you have nipped this in the bud now.

PrettyPurse · 30/11/2019 18:06

@Notasmugknob - except in this case the MIL has two son's....

Cherrysoup · 30/11/2019 18:07

We've decided to go to my parents instead, purely because I can't be bothered to humour this situation, especially at DS' expense

Hurray! The perfect solution. Is your dh 100% behind this?

PrettyPurse · 30/11/2019 18:08

@Nobhobs - just seen your update. Good decision!

womenspeakout · 30/11/2019 18:11

We've decided to go to my parents instead, purely because I can't be bothered to humour this situation, especially at DS' expense

Good call, go where it's easier and you're welcome as you are.

You wouldn't enjoy the day regardless now, if you took it (as you should) you would have been thinking if there was going to be an argument, if you didn't you'd be annoyed at placating this insanity and worried what you'll do with your baby. Not to mention feeling the stress of it all.

Have a lovely day at your parents.

billy1966 · 30/11/2019 18:15

Good call OP.

Wishing you the best.

I sincerely hope that this is the last time they embarrass themselves with such silliness.

Something tells me it won't be.💐

AcrossthePond55 · 30/11/2019 18:16

Good decision! After all, next year BOTH babies will be able to sit in high chairs as equals 🙄 so MiL will think everything is just peachy!

EleanorReally · 30/11/2019 18:18

well done op.
fuck the sun indeed

candlelitteacakes · 30/11/2019 18:20

Well done OP your IL's are freaks!

Notasmugknob · 30/11/2019 18:26

How did I miss that? Given that I RTFT. Oh no wait I did know that. My point was about MILs changing. Thanks for telling me know though mumsnet police. What would we all do without you making sure we don’t make any mistakes.. 🤣

Minxmumma · 30/11/2019 18:27

Well played op! Best outcome and no more batty demands from the ILs

Notasmugknob · 30/11/2019 18:27

@PrettyPurse perhaps if you RTFT you would see she already said she’s not going

Poppinjay · 30/11/2019 18:30

I think that's a sensible decision.

Hopefully this will prevent any future ridiculous demands designed to appease your SIL, who sounds quite entitled and controlling.

HappyintheHills · 30/11/2019 18:35

Absolutely the right thing to do, it seems that yourDS is to play second fiddle to your DN.

ironickname · 30/11/2019 18:35


Please keep us updated next year when your mil and sil ask you to tie your son's legs together because his cousin isn't walking yet!

Meirou90 · 30/11/2019 18:53

Best update ever. Simple, but to the point. Loved the bit about the Sun also.

FrancisCrawford · 30/11/2019 18:55

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Thestrangestthing · 30/11/2019 18:57

Buy a cheap high chair for the new baby and take it for them. Then when you get their bring it out and yell "surprise" now everyone will be in the Christmas photo. Combat batshit with batshit.

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