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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Can't believe I'm even posting this. Christmas dinner highchair'gate'

831 replies

Nobhobs · 29/11/2019 11:49

Spending Christmas with DH, DS and the in laws. We're weaning DS so mentioned in passing bringing his high chair so he can sit with us during Christmas dinner (if he's not napping or anything like that) he's very alert and active and gets arsey if not being entertained. He loves being in his high chair and round the table and it's his first Christmas so we're a bit excited (yes I know he worn remember it)

MIL has said we can't bring his highchair, as her other sons baby will only be 8 weeks old and can't sit in one and we can't leave out one of the babies on Christmas Day. I laughed thinking it was a bad joke, but no, deadly serious.

We sort of ignored and thought we'd deal with it on the day, but had a text from 8 week olds mum saying that MIL had told her we were going to try and leave her child out and that she's not happy about it. Her baby will be the only one not in the Christmas dinner photos if we bring our highchair Hmm I said well obviously baby can be held up in the photos if that's what's upsetting you, DS is at the age where he doesn't just nap constantly and wants to be involved and entertained and it's nothing to do with leaving her child out.

It's totally ridiculous and DH is now saying just to leave the highchair at home to avoid drama. I've never had any issues with the in laws before and I'm mind blown by how stupid this is. Or am I BU? Is this a thing?! If one babies on the floor they all have to be?? Hmm

OP posts:
Dollymixture22 · 30/11/2019 15:27

Well done.

You are totally right to take a stand now.

Ginfordinner · 30/11/2019 15:36

I love it when an AIBU has a good result.

Winterdaysarehere · 30/11/2019 15:38

Bet it was purely your decision... Has dh told mil yet?

Clettercletterthatsbetter · 30/11/2019 15:40

They’re fucking bonkers. I wouldn’t go there on Christmas Day out of principle.

Are they going to feed the 8 week old a Christmas dinner too so he doesn’t feel left out?

MustShowDH · 30/11/2019 15:41

Great update and send them a link to this thread so they know why and that EVERYONE else thinks they're batshit too.

Have a lovely Xmas.x.

Clettercletterthatsbetter · 30/11/2019 15:41

Just seen your update. Well done you!

firstimemamma · 30/11/2019 15:43

Yanbu, that's insane!

It's a good job your MIL and SIL aren't coming to ours for Christmas. We don't even have Christmas dinner photos full stop - that would send them over the edge!

NowApparently · 30/11/2019 15:47

Take the highchair but don't take it in with you right away. Let little one roll around the floor with some mashed potato and gravy. See how long it takes MIL to regret her choice.

Lweji · 30/11/2019 15:49

Take the highchair

She will, but to her parents. Grin

PersonaNonGarter · 30/11/2019 15:56

Well done.

They’re weirdos.

itzybitzy · 30/11/2019 15:56

Makes me wonder what MIL has said to SIL to make her think you are trying to "leave out" her 8 week old.

She sounds like a right silly bint.

Take the high chair, if she kicks off, ask if she is suggesting you don't feed your weaning child?!

This isn't some competition, it's a baby eating ffs!!

itzybitzy · 30/11/2019 15:57

Sorry late to the post and just seen your update.

Good choice OP!! Grin

EL2019 · 30/11/2019 15:57

Well done OP. The only way out is not to play.

Hope you have a lovely Christmas day

WhereYouLeftIt · 30/11/2019 16:07

Good call. Have a lovely Christmas!

LaurieSchafferIsAllBitterNow · 30/11/2019 16:09

Excellent decision OP, but you must make a gift of a high chair to your ILs at some point, and tell them it is not to be used for the other child ...two can play at that crazy game

ysmaem · 30/11/2019 16:09

WTF!!! OP YANBU. Take the high chair and tell them to get a grip.

LionelRitchieStoleMyNotebook · 30/11/2019 16:12

This is crazy. SIL messaged me to ask if they could bring DNs high chair, I said no.... Because we have a spare so no need for them to take up space in their car, not because I expect babies to be on the floor! Older DN will be on a normal chair albeit with a plump cushion, should he have to sit in a high chair at 5 because that's what the other children are doing??

Comradesally · 30/11/2019 16:37

Well done op.

Watch out for strange behaviour in future comparing them

spanglydangly · 30/11/2019 16:39

Well done op!

BloggersBlog · 30/11/2019 16:48

Have you/DH told them yet @Nobhobs and why you arent going there? Really good that you have put your foot down at this early stage

Winterdaysarehere · 30/11/2019 17:01

My mil tried to stop me bf my ds as she hadn't bf her ds and it wasn't right!!

Darbs76 · 30/11/2019 17:03

They can’t be for real?

Rtruth · 30/11/2019 17:26

DH needs to man up and tell his parents they are not leaving anyone out, it’s just normal food etiquette to have a chair.

MrsBadcrumble123 · 30/11/2019 17:32

@ChristmasbloodyChristmas seriously?! You sound like a barrel of laughs!! Christmas is about the whole family celebrating not picking and choosing who fits in and who doesn’t!!

nuxe1984 · 30/11/2019 17:35

Take the chair. Tell them that's how he now eats his meals. That as he grows up he needs to learn by example. That it's nothing to do with leaving the other baby out.
Ask he if she expects your ds to sleep at the same time as the 8 week old? And when your ds walks, comes out of nappies, etc is she expecting the other child to do the same? Or do you keep your ds in nappies until the other one catches up?

Ridiculous!!!!

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