Can't believe I'm even posting this. Christmas dinner highchair'gate'

[Nobhobs]

Spending Christmas with DH, DS and the in laws. We're weaning DS so mentioned in passing bringing his high chair so he can sit with us during Christmas dinner (if he's not napping or anything like that) he's very alert and active and gets arsey if not being entertained. He loves being in his high chair and round the table and it's his first Christmas so we're a bit excited (yes I know he worn remember it)

MIL has said we can't bring his highchair, as her other sons baby will only be 8 weeks old and can't sit in one and we can't leave out one of the babies on Christmas Day. I laughed thinking it was a bad joke, but no, deadly serious.

We sort of ignored and thought we'd deal with it on the day, but had a text from 8 week olds mum saying that MIL had told her we were going to try and leave her child out and that she's not happy about it. Her baby will be the only one not in the Christmas dinner photos if we bring our highchair I said well obviously baby can be held up in the photos if that's what's upsetting you, DS is at the age where he doesn't just nap constantly and wants to be involved and entertained and it's nothing to do with leaving her child out.

It's totally ridiculous and DH is now saying just to leave the highchair at home to avoid drama. I've never had any issues with the in laws before and I'm mind blown by how stupid this is. Or am I BU? Is this a thing?! If one babies on the floor they all have to be??

Can't you go to your parents instead, and next year at MIL's they can both be in their highchairs?

I'm really stretching here, but there's no way that they've bought you a fancy highchair or a booster type thing for Christmas is there? And then their complete insanity is actually just an ott cover up for that?

Erm they are not normal. Stay at home instead.

It would be perversely amusing to go without the chair, let him sit at the table on someone's knee and just put his hands in everything and knock shit over.

This is one of the most ridiculous things I've ever heard.

Message your SIL back. 'Obv not excluding the baby 😂 MIL seems to have a batshit idea that using a highchair will somehow ruin Christmas. Dd is too wriggly to be held at the table, and we want to enjoy Xmas dinner. DH will speak to her, don't worry'

Just to add to the chorus. They are fucking crazy. I thought my in laws were until I read this. They're relatively sane in comparison.

Where is your baby to eat then 🤷‍♀️ if weaning then they will be having christmas dinner too. People are strange.

'tip of a very stupid iceberg' . Nothing to add except this thread makes my in-laws' Christmas arrangements look normal.

If it's an issue after that I would have Christmas at home ' we'll come to you when the baby's old enough to sit in a chair so no-one feels left out, it just won't work before then'

They are bonkers, bring chair anyway. Option 2
Stuff him full of additives and let him loose in their house, then say " Oh if only we had the high chair we'd be able to manage him better."

I would want to clarify what they mean. Because if the issue is that your DS can't be in the Xmas dinner photograph (which I have never heard of as a thing, we are generally too busy eating) then presumably him being on a lap will not be acceptable either. So do they mean he is not to join you in the dining room at all? If so where do they think he ought to be?

Stay at home and let them get on with it. They're batshit!

Tell them you've been training your DC to take photographs so he do the Christmas dinner photo for them, but needs to be in his highchair to be at correct height.

I would position myself on the moral high ground without giving in. So, "The last thing I would want to do is cause upset, but DS will kick up a fuss if he's on my lap for dinner and I won't get to eat anything (and I do love MIL's cooking so it would be a great loss). So to keep the peace we will have Christmas dinner just the three of us at our house. Would you like us to drop off presents on Christmas day or would you prefer a few days beforehand?"

Stay home. don't spoil your memories of your baby on his first Christmas. She'll realise she's stupid when she gets to see baby on boxing day.

Bring a second highchair n say oh just chuck the 8 week old in here so he won't miss out.

I'm mind blown by how stupid this is.

Indeed! Come back, OP...

So basically you’re at fault because your child is older than your SILs child, wtf!
Just put this to them ^ and take a booster seat instead.

Can you imagine what’ll happen if your DC wants to eat at the same time as you all - does that mean you won’t be “in the photo” because you’ll be behind a freak show-barrier-curtain feeding your child Xmas dinner - what a load of bollocks.

Stand firm and tell your SIL that YOU didn’t mention her baby at all as it’s none of your business, that you instead are planning ahead for your OWN child so that comment she’s made is ridiculous!

But I thought I was the law that all grandparents must have Ikea Antelop high chairs. Perhaps PIL didn’t get the memo. They will need two for both babies eventually or ‘gasp’ they won’t be able to eat with you at the same time. (£15 or whatever they are and they stack (I have twins and this is what all the GPS did)

I don't understand, baby's first Xmas where they can actually eat all the food is magical! Why would they want to take that experience away from everyone :(

I'd honestly be tempted to stay at home.

Batshit crazy in my opinion

Take the high chair or stay home! They are batshit!

Batshit. We have a high chair that straps to an adult chair like a booster seat. Take one of those. She didn’t say you couldn’t have a booster seat!

That's crazy! Yanbu
Sorry it made me laugh, bring the highchair and use it. At 8 weeks old the other baby may well be asleep ,won't care if it's at the table but your DC will. As soon as.my DC were old enough to sit in a high chair they always ate at the table with us. Just explain it firmly , the other baby is at a completely different stage and no one is suggesting for one minute they are left out.